spEak You’re bRanes

One from Paul Sharville on the subject of Mike Reid’s death.

mike was a true comic and acting legend, and will be sourly missed.
Kirk, London

Like a lemon.

“Is scouting still relevant today?
A word of warning to the PC loony lefty pro human rights pro Health and Safety to death extremeists. Without this great institution, our society would be a whole lot worse! Stay away from tampering with the Scouting movement and let youngsters enjoy what I did so much thirty years ago. You can’t replace, camping, firemaking, expeditions, knot and rope craft, canoeing, and service to the public etc with video games and a play station. 1977

Charlie the Cat Hatestheleft, ASBOville (formally known as Calne..) Speedcamerashire, United Kingdom

Chin up Charlie! You may have nothing left to live for but at least you’ll be dead soon.

ANYTHING THAT WILL IMPROVE OUR COUNTRY IS A BONUS. AS A COUNTRY WE DON’T WANT DRUGS , DRINK DRIVERS , ABUSE . SO THE MORE LAWS AND POLICIES AGAINST THESE THE BETTER .

EVEN IF IT ONLY SAVES 1 PERSONS LIFE ITS WORTH IT.

BECKY, BIRMINGHAM

They should make drink driving DOUBLE illegal and see if anyone still dares to do it.

Thanks to Greg for this one.

Of course doing 30mph is less dangerous than doing 40mph. So, let’s enforce the 30mph limit. But wait. Doing 20mph is even less dangerous, think of how many children will be saved. So, 20 is plenty. And why not abolish cars altogether: let’s just walk, think of how many innocent children we will save. Of course we don’t do that, because we know (even if it is not PC to say) that the benefits of driving (personal and to society in general) FAR OUTWEIGH the cost of a few thousand road deaths a year. That’s why almost all of us often speed. Me, too. I do about 50mph (like everyone else on that road) on a safe 30mph country road, every day as I drive to work and back. It takes me 30 min instead of 50. That’s 40 min each day that I can spend in more productive ways, and I feel also less tired and more efficient at work. Multiply that by millions of other “speeding” drivers over the UK, and you’ll understand how much our society benefits from the time gained by “speeding”.
Rob Barberis, Guildford

That’s awfully thoughtful of you Rob but I think it’s probably best if you stick to the speed limit and the rest of us will try to somehow get by without that extra 40 minutes of your “productive” time (although it would be an impressively long wank).

Thanks to Anthony for finding this one.

We could maybe start by showing that phaedophilia isnt accepted in our society since then the lefty do-gooders stop us from showing this atm. Phaedo’s seem to get as light a sentance as junkies do nowadays therefore gives the wrong impression that it’s only “frowned upon”. We need some serious judging and phaedos to be made an example off.

Scare the phaedos out of Britain instead of making excuses for em and thinkin society can cure them. What a waste of efforts.
[Egnite], Aberdeen, United Kingdom

When will our revolutionary pinko commie government get it into their heads that bumming children is wrong??

TERRORISTS WHEREEVER YOU ARE AND WHOEVER YOU ARE - GO GET A LIFE FOR YOURSELVES - INSTEAD OF TAKING THE LIVES OF OTHERS !! IN THE EYES OF ” JOE PUBLIC “, YOU ARE SUCH A SAD MINORITY - HOW PATHETIC THAT YOU ALLOW YOURSELVES TO BE CONTROLLED BY ” SOME OTHER ” -CAN YOU NOT THINK FOR YOURSELF,HAVE A MIND OF YOUR OWN,BE A HUMANE HUMAN BEING OTHER THAN BEING SLAVES/ROBOTS TO SENSELESS, WORTHLESS, BLOOD THIRSTY BULLIES !!
JAN, N.E. SCOTLAND

Thanks Jan. The evil ones will certainly think twice about exploding after reading that!

Are airport bottlenecks a security hazard?

In simple terms yes..but then again a football match, a cricket match, a rock concert are potential targets too. We just have to get on with life.

Andy, York

Then again, would it really be terrorism to wipe out U2 along with a few thousand shambling man-children who are so nearly dead inside that they think it’s worth paying actual money to watch that leather-trousered shitstain smugly wheezing his way through a few cock-awful songs whilst wearing “whacky” shades like he’s Timmy fucking Mallet or something?

An extension is not enough what is required is interment without trial considering the complete lack of co-operation from the Muslim community on the issue of terror. Revoke the human rights act and give police and security services carte blanche to control these people.

Nothing is to extreme in order to protect our indigenous population from these savage fundamentalists.

Bob Dole

I’m going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet.^*

^*Shamelessly stolen from bash.org

Thanks for these Angel.

Maybe if all these soft southerners had drunk the local water instead of causing global warming by having French sewerage shipped in, in bottles, their rivers would be lower and better able to cope. I just can’t stop chuckling over the irony

run rabbit run

Even now, they’re just floating around and complaining. Why not get loads of thirsty people to start drinking the flood water? Things would be back to normal in no time.

Thanks to Dave for this one.

NATO??? Did you say NATO??? Call me an ambulance, I’ve split my sides!!! NATO couldn’t defend my kid’s tree house without internal squabbles about whose troops will & won’t be put in harm’s way.
Once the objectives have been agreed the politicians should shut up & leave it to the military to deliver. To do otherwise is to tie the hands of the troops on the ground - and it’s difficult using an assault rifle in that situation.
Fire Storm, Chelmsford

That ambulance joke is BRILLIANT and really lends weight to the argument that follows.