Miscellaneous Prats27 Jul 2007 12:18 pm

Stiff Upper Lip

By Nelson

Are airport bottlenecks a security hazard?

In simple terms yes..but then again a football match, a cricket match, a rock concert are potential targets too. We just have to get on with life.

Andy, York

Then again, would it really be terrorism to wipe out U2 along with a few thousand shambling man-children who are so nearly dead inside that they think it’s worth paying actual money to watch that leather-trousered shitstain smugly wheezing his way through a few cock-awful songs whilst wearing “whacky” shades like he’s Timmy fucking Mallet or something?

10 Responses to “Stiff Upper Lip”

  1. on 27 Jul 2007 at 12:24 pm   Roderick Glossop

    I think you’ve stepped over the line here. What Andy from York says is both rational and well-articulated. The only (minor) fault in it is the strange Daily Mirror-style double-dot ellipsis.

    But you’ve used it as a springboard for a massively over-written Charlie Brookeresque rant. What was wrong with shooting fish in a barrel, eh?

  2. on 27 Jul 2007 at 12:33 pm   Nelson

    Sorry Sir Roderick.

  3. on 27 Jul 2007 at 1:24 pm   Nicky

    Yes Nelson you’ve crossed a line. This is not the place for such comments. The place for such comments is HYS!

  4. on 27 Jul 2007 at 1:27 pm   Nelson

    I’m weeping hot tears of shame right now.

  5. on 27 Jul 2007 at 6:24 pm   Nelson

    Well. I’ve meditated upon this for a while and I’ve come to some conclusions.

    I’d like to apologise to any other U2 fans out there. It’s not your fault you were born with cloth ears and, it must be said, every moment that awful cunt spends working on his “music” career is one less moment spent:

    • a) shaking hands with war criminals and mass murderers
    • b) lending whatever “popstar cred” he has to state/corporate power
    • c) helping corporations market credit cards and iPods which, in turn, help countless credulous fools to imagine that, by using one, they’ve finally done something to “help” as opposed to merely contributing to the very situation that the smug insular tosspot claims to be opposing and hence
    • d) hypocritically bleating on about “making poverty history”.

    Fuck corporations. Fuck plutocracy. Fuck oligarchy. Fuck Bono. Fuck his stupid fucking face. Fuck his stupid fucking glasses. Fuck the awful cunt’s “brand” and fuck everything that he does.

    But yeah, Roderick was right. Andy from York didn’t do anything wrong. Sorry Andy. I hope you can forgive me. And remember kids… Fuck Bono.

  6. on 30 Jul 2007 at 11:05 am   Tom

    The only mistake you made was not shoe horning the arch-Afrophile cunt, Robert Geldof, into the rant, as well.

    To paraphrase Partridge “I wish Geldof and Bono would get on a bus and drive over a cliff. I’d happily be the driver”.

  7. on 30 Jul 2007 at 3:56 pm   Roderick Glossop

    Hear hear on the hating Bono bit, by the way. Please don’t mistake me for a U2 apologist.

  8. on 30 Jul 2007 at 5:28 pm   Nelson

    You never actually meet anyone who likes U2 do you? Nobody ever owns up to it. Liking U2 is a bit like being a racist.

  9. on 16 Aug 2007 at 11:37 pm   Barry Manilow

    http://tinyurl.com/34kn22

    how right you are, since U2 are an Irish reggae band who stole everything from Jamaican and African culture. The link above explains everything, ever

  10. on 11 Dec 2007 at 12:23 am   Tramadol.

    Tramadol….

    Tramadol hydrochloride. Tramadol saturday delivery. Tramadol….

Trackback this Post | Feed on comments to this Post

Leave a Reply

Comments will be sent to the moderation queue.