Permanently Bewildered23 Nov 2007 04:15 pm
Please May I Store My Cancer In Your Cervix?
By NelsonThanks to Jemma for this submission from the page about vaccinating against cervical cancer.
Why are only girls being vaccinated? Is there any health reason why this should not be delivered to all boys of the same age group as well? It might teach them something about responsible attitudes to sex.
Mary Roulston, Belfast
This is going to be a little shocking for you Mary. Boys don’t have a cervix and so they have to store their cancers elsewhere. Don’t worry about the complicated medical stuff for now, I’ve drawn you a diagram that should explain everything.
Hahahahahaha I’m literally weeping.
She’s blatantly jumped straight to the HYS page without actually reading the subject.
“what? girls getting vaccinated for SEX? what about boys!”
Yeah, I’m with Mary, Equal rights, equal rights!
Much as I love anyone who rails against the dimwitted fucknuts we have to share this island with, I think this once could be right.
The vaccine is against a virus, HPV, that causes cervical cancer in women but is carried by both men and women. If you vaccinated boys before their dangly foofoos were big enough for sex then they wouldn’t be able to carry the virus and pass it on to women.
You’re right Jon, and if you’ve ever had genital warts (caused by HPV) frozen off your foofoo at the clap clinic you’d welcome the preventative measure!
Darn these Daily Mail reading loons getting stuff right!
Does the vaccine work in males?
Anyway, less of the reasoned debate please. This is about mocking and cynicism.
Yes Nelson. Jon and Pete are correct. The vaccine acts on a virus which has been proven to cause cervical cancer and is resident in a significant proportion of sexually active people. It doesn’t stop and look at the sex of its host before deciding to activate itself.
I am a doctor by the way, and if any ladies out there have sore chests, I am happy to examine them.
You speak you’re branes, Nelson.
I hav biggah genitul wartz than you’re branes.
Vacsin8 me!
Is there any proven (or approved) vaccine against HPV in males?
Rich is a doctor. He will tell us. Perhaps he can also explain why my shoulder hurts. If not, then it is safe to say he is lying about being a doctor. We shall see.
While I’m not sure why Wellingtons shoulder hurts and I’m not a doctor and only a mere healthcare student I’m struggling to understand why a vaccine would need different clinical trials for males as it would females. Just because males are incapable of developing cervical cancer it is my understanding that we are just as capable of contracting HPV, unless it is a chromosome specific infection, not something I’ve come across. But then I am only a first year.
Cool. So, can I vaccinate my shower curtain? Or should I just tell the missus to steer clear of it?
You expect me to diagnose a problem with your shoulder without an examination?
As a wild guess though, I’d say it’s probably muscle strain due to excessive amounts of poovy mincing.
Seems a sound enough diagnosis given the data he’s working with.
As for Mary, I am fairly sure she has no clue what HPV is. She may be right that jabbing a needle into the little buggers’ cocks now and again might slow ‘em up a bit.
Sorry to bring facts into play - I only know about STDs cos I look up naughty words in dictionaries.