Thanks to Tom for this work of demented genius (from a Metro comment page).
hi gerry and kate madeleine will be back with you both on new year’s eve.your detective is doing a very good job, finding madeleine. she loves you both very much indeed . my name is debbie carroll . madeleine is a lovely little girl.who would want to harm her . i was watching a programme last night and this morning about maddy’s dissapearance. martin brunt was doing it on sky news.she will be home ok.has the song goes, oh thinging about the days when you were here with me.
debbie carroll, ireland co louth
Tom adds:
I can only assume Debbie is under medical instruction to carefully write down any thought-like impulses she might have, as they caper merrily through her brain like fleeting ghosts.
I’m imagining them as psychedaelic elephant-shaped balloons wearing sinister grins, slowly bouncing off each other in an aircraft hanger made of Maddie’s dreams.
5 Responses to “Oh Thinging About The Days”
The first three sentences sound like they should be being said through a kazoo down the phone to the McCann’s home number.
If only she didn’t go and arse it all up in the fourth.
Debbie is obviously channelling Kirsty Macoll, who has returned in spirit to protest against the BBC’s censorship of her festive tune, and offer trite gibberish to the everlastingly miserable McCanns
Hello? Where the fuck is everyone? I very much doubt that all the idiots in the country have sworn off posting gibberish for their new years resolution (I know I haven’t), so what gives you idle sods? Eh? Eh?
Dear CareintheCommunity Folkses,
have they let Debbie off her section then ?
It sickens me that these dim-witted sea slugs feel they can publicly shoulder their way into the grief of someone else - someone they have never even met - and start spout greeting-card piss-splattered sentiments like this.
If I ever met her I’d gladly throttle the mad cow and willingly pay the price.