Miscellaneous Prats14 Mar 2008 01:51 pm
By Nelson

Thanks to Chris. Is it wrong to try to have a deaf child?

“Please Doc, I want a baby who is left-handed, red- haired and sings out of tune. I could not love him/her otherwise.”

No no no! If you cannot accept a child for who he is, stay childless!
They call me Mimi, Edinburgh

As Chris says, “<insert Mick Hucknall satire here>”.

29 Responses to “Gingervitis”

  1. on 14 Mar 2008 at 2:00 pm Scaryduck

    I saw an otherwise charming young lady in Marks and Spencers who had the hairiest arms I have ever seen.

    With liberalised genetic engineering laws, we can wipe out the scourge of hairy-armed women at a stroke.

    And THAT’S why it’s A Good Thing.

  2. on 14 Mar 2008 at 2:07 pm :-)

    Ah, but was it a hairy-armed lady or a forgetful tranny?

  3. on 14 Mar 2008 at 2:27 pm NWSimon

    They call me Mimi? Who are “they”? Beaker off The Muppet Show?

    Sorry - carry on.

  4. on 14 Mar 2008 at 3:07 pm Mr Blackett

    Who needs genetic engineering? I’ll make your kid deaf for free. I’ll even supply my own knitting needle.

    And It’ll be fucking hilarious.

  5. on 14 Mar 2008 at 3:22 pm SlartyBartFarst

    Why would anyone want a ginger baby? You would be just asking for all the peedo’s in the world to come knocking at your door asking for a fiddle.

  6. on 14 Mar 2008 at 4:05 pm zymeck

    Do Ginger Babies attract Violin playing child abusers?

  7. on 14 Mar 2008 at 4:44 pm Rocketman

    I am ginger.

    My childhood was full of wind instrument playing child abusers. Never any violin players though.

  8. on 14 Mar 2008 at 6:27 pm Fish

    *obvious pink oboe gag*

  9. on 14 Mar 2008 at 9:23 pm Jollity

    My dad has never mentioned child abuse involving violinists when talking about his childhood. Perhaps it’s just too distressing for him. Especially the violinists, I’m sure.

  10. on 15 Mar 2008 at 1:00 am fucko the clown

    we tried wiping out all hairy women in 1945 but the fucking krauts surrendered before we managed to wipe them all out.

  11. on 15 Mar 2008 at 1:33 pm the whole damn orchestra

    actually I’ve always thought they were mostly piano teachers…

  12. on 15 Mar 2008 at 5:24 pm papple

    isn’t mimi slang for cunt?

  13. on 15 Mar 2008 at 11:45 pm Simon

    why is this miscellaneous prat not also categorised as a racist? after all, the anti-ginger sentiments are clear for all to see.

    have i uncovered the unconcious, institutional racism on Speak You’re Branes?

  14. on 16 Mar 2008 at 12:31 am HJ

    Us rangas are always being discriminated against.. and fiddled to.

  15. on 17 Mar 2008 at 10:44 am Nick

    Nah, papple, it’s mimsi you are thinking of.

    And GE is a Good thing. I for one welcome the day when I can have miniature elephants as pets, and a fish tank full of (not so) Great White Sharks. Actually, given my wishes I’d actually liek miniature mammoths and sabre tooth tigers roaming around the living room being chased by mini neanderthals.

  16. on 17 Mar 2008 at 3:28 pm fucko the clown

    Nick, the mini neanderthals already exist, just go to Wales

  17. on 18 Mar 2008 at 10:40 am Scaryduck

    Nick: Admit it. You’re just hot for that S Club 7 bird out of Primeval, aren’t you?

  18. on 18 Mar 2008 at 4:07 pm seagull's front bottom

    Where’s my animal fannies?

  19. on 18 Mar 2008 at 5:23 pm fucko the clown

    update the site will you, i need new and interesting morons to take the piss out of, and thus making my own pointless existance, somehow feel more superior

  20. on 18 Mar 2008 at 5:46 pm Nelson

    Sorry. I was away all weekend at Bloc and then today I had to get up at 6am and drive for many hours. I couldn’t be fucked to do anything on here.

    Perhaps I’m a whale muff.

  21. on 18 Mar 2008 at 5:53 pm James

    Don’t be so hard on yourself, you’re more of a manatee’s minge.

  22. on 18 Mar 2008 at 7:35 pm papple

    ‘Bloc’? as in a guided tour of the former GDR?

  23. on 18 Mar 2008 at 7:41 pm Panther pussy

    I wondered that.

    Regarding the rest, it’s not as if there’s not enough material, some of it quite classic.

  24. on 18 Mar 2008 at 8:24 pm bRITAIN's Fukked

    I think Nelson’s been to a popular music festival - that’s the kind of PC, tree-hugging nonsense that’s sending this country to the dogs in a handbasket! That’s it! I’m emigrating!!! BRITAIN’S A JOKE!!!!

    Thank you Gordon Clown!!!

  25. on 19 Mar 2008 at 2:31 pm fucko the clown

    I googled bloc, bristol light opera company, i’d say more of a Prawns fufu.

    @bRITAIN’s Fukked - mr Stuart Booth, come on down……

    well since there are no stories to gripe over, i’d like to dedicate one to heather mills, after all the bad press she has had recently and all the evil hateful things people have said about this poor woman, I do hope that she can now get some peace from the press, £24m is a reasonable some and I think she is more than entitled to it*

    *as long as she agrees to have ‘money grabbing fuck pig’ tattooed on her forehead.

  26. on 19 Mar 2008 at 3:22 pm Jack

    Come on Fucko, (if that is your real name), surely after she’s had his sweaty scouseness grinding away on top of her for four years, it’ only fair that she gets some compensation?

    And yeah Nelson, get a move on! We’re on tenterhooks here! Is it going to be a Ardwolf’s pudenda, or a Zebu’s love hole this week?

  27. on 19 Mar 2008 at 3:55 pm Don Durito

    I too would like to add my voice to the growing clamour for Nelson to pull his finger out and update the site. I am in serious danger of actually logging on to HYS in search of lulz. Isopod’s gash.

  28. on 19 Mar 2008 at 4:19 pm Nelson

    Pah. PAH.

  29. on 19 Mar 2008 at 5:06 pm fucko the clown

    I am sick of people not taking me seriously because they think my name is made up. it was changed by depole (it was a big room where you couldn’t get in if you were Polish) from my christened name, cuntaclaus the clown, which of is plainly a cruel joke bestowed by unloving parents.

    as for heather mills, its not like she needs a massive budget for shoes is it! although they never listed woodworm treatment in the settlement.

    I vote chop off her other leg and nickname her rollerpig the greedy.

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