Slow Readers and Werthers Original Imperialists29 May 2008 01:00 pm
By Nelson
Thanks to Chris.
the idea that song lyrics are good sadly is a missguided concept. not since the early eighties has popular even resembled human speach. its endemic of poor quality university studies to analyse song lyrics, either they cant learn anything worthwile or it realy is true that with higher learning you lessen common sence and these are our future polititions well now i understand new labour sadly i can honestly say i feel a deep shame to say im british.
[delminister], truro, United Kingdom
I went to see Public Enemy last night. Imagine my surprise when a couple of African-looking gentlemen jumped up on stage and started shouting incomprehensible gobbledegook from the ghetto.
Doo Wah Diddy Diddy….. Wimoweh…..
I rest my case.
To call Public Enemy lyrics “incomprehensible gobbledegook” is demeaning to Flava Flav’s unrivalled achievements in the field of spouting bizarre and meaningless drivel. HYSers should learn from this visionary.
Hey delminister, if you can get yourself to Dublin there’s a job waiting for you as an English teacher.
To Alex: Yeeeeaaaahhhh Booooyyyy!
owe thee eye-runny
I’m glad that popular music doesn’t resemble human speech. Especially when humans are speaking like Delminster.
He was in full effect last night. Fucking great gig.
Although Chuck D apparently believes that Diana was murdered by the royal family. Presumably to put an end to her tireless fight against injustice.
Everyone knows Phil did it because Diana wasn’t Greek or German enough to be part of the English Royal Family.
Where do I go to get a degree in song lyrics please? I want to become a politition.
Common sence? Is that that thing that means ’shares my views exactly’?
That was brilliant!
If only he’d been able to also squeeze in a half-baked mention of immigration he’d have a perfect score.
He’s managed to seamlessly blend a rant about song lyrics with a rant about Labour with the cunning use of gobbledegook. Genius.
Perhaps the contributor has read too many beat writers, whilst listening to skat singers, and partaking in acid in order to not realise that his contribtution is meaningless jibber-jabber. I myself like cake and will continue to like cake, but not so much now under Nu-labour. Honk honk.
He must have been taken in by all these lyrics himself. The way his punctuation, spelling and grammar peters out as the rant goes on barely resembles human speech either.
How about another exam question? Translate the complete works of delminister into English.
It’s an idea. Create a bRanes scoring system with which to judge HYS posts…
10 points if you mention immigrunts
10 for peados
10 for blaming the govt
10 for saying you will emigrate
10 for saying you couldnt make it up
10 for atrocious spelling
10 extra for complaining about the standard of English as well as having atrocious spelling of your own
10 for mentioning True English, or True Brits
10 for having a fucking stupid name
10 for being Topsy Turvy or clone
obviously 100 out of 100 would be the perfect score, or if you have Elie Ngandu’s skills, 101.2 out of 100.
I think delminster is a silly rabbit
10 for telling someone (anyone, anywhere) to WAKE UP!!! (plus a bonus point per exclamation mark)
I like the new twat-a-tron. That is all.
I think the twat-a-tron could be used to generate rap lyrics for uber twat Topsy Turvy.
I think you need to give out extra bonus points for all the clichés - ten points for WAKE UP!!! and YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!, ten for GORDON BLIAR and TONY CLOWN, and then five for more obscure rant-punctuation like YOU COULDN’T MAKE IT UP!!! And of course twenty for IYLISMWDYGLT. Doesn’t really matter if the percents go well over a hundred.
10 points for writing FACT!! in capitals..
indeed it doesn’t matter if the percentages exceed 100, as HYS/Daily Moan maths often does this - “NOW immigrants own 150% of homes!”
Twat-o-tron; anyone got the source code, i want to shamelessly re-use it to parody my own particular bete noir, the daily hatred…
I’ll call it the LittleJohn-O-Tron.
“sadly i can honestly say i feel a deep shame to say im british.”
The shame is all ours, Delminister. The shame is all oyrs.
> I went to see Public Enemy last night… Fucking great gig.
Hmm, would that have been at Rock City? If so, I can concur.
Though I must protest at venue management getting in low-paid migrant hip-hop artists and putting TRUE BRITISH rappers out of work.
Like, erm, Ant & Dec.
Anyone else feel this post is a good argument for Cornish independence?
> Anyone else feel this post is a good argument for Cornish independence?
Ah, the Cornish Nationalist Party. “There ain’t no black in the Cornish fla-oh, never mind.”