spEak You’re bRanes

32 Responses to “Fucking Immigrant”

1. on 23 Jun 2008 at 11:47 am   arsebanana
   
   

   That’ll be the 1970 labour government led by Edward Heath then - oops

2. on 23 Jun 2008 at 11:49 am   Peter
   
   

   The English in this letter is so appalling, even for HYS. Are you sure you weren’t kicked out of the country for your crimes against its language? Or maybe your brain has turned to mush since you became a forruner? Because we all know how thick they are.

   Come to think about it, your letter sounds like it was written by one of those Nigerian scambaiters…

3. on 23 Jun 2008 at 11:50 am   Peter
   
   

   Bugger, I meant scammers, not scambaiters. Arsebiscuits.

4. on 23 Jun 2008 at 12:00 pm   Rob
   
   

   it reads exactly like the bad journalism from a page of the sun or the star. i can almost see him, fat red and sweating ordering a sangria and fish and chips in english from a pokey little english themed pub somewhere in palma. wonder if there is a spanish equlivalent of hys complaining about the lazy stupid british people that end up immigrating over there.

5. on 23 Jun 2008 at 12:01 pm   Mr Cat
   
   

   I think he moved because he was bullied so much about his surname.

   I also think Spain will “will end up a third world country and will now have main problems to face from letting so main people arrive” if those people are like him.

6. on 23 Jun 2008 at 12:04 pm   db
   
   

   Scum.

7. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:08 pm   Oliver
   
   

   Oh yeah Mark, of course. Britain is just teetering on the brink of becoming a desert where nothing will grow, where we have a barter economy, starvation and disease is widespread and we are ruled by a tiny elite who rob every penny handed to us and divert it into arms or personal bank accounts.

   Get a sense of perspective you arrogant tossbucket.

   Bit of unfocussed rage there, but twats like that really get on my wick.

8. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:17 pm   Em
   
   

   There’s no way that bloke’s first language is English.

   Which, in my book, makes him an immigrant who’s already emigrated, complaining about immigration to a country he neither lives in or is a citizen of… possibly the pinnacle of the joint hypocrisy and ignorance this site is here to highlight.

9. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:18 pm   Em
   
   

   Bollocks, I mean ‘nor’. Bloody spelling. I blame my immigrant mother for infesting me with her forrin ignorance at birth - what can I say…

10. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:26 pm   Mad from Barking
    
    

    “You know what, Pedro? My country’s really gone down the absolute shitter. No really, it has. Absolutely ruined by all these sodding tea-towel-heads and god-knows-who just strolling in without anybody’s say so. Pint o’ lager, while you’re there, Pedro. Oh, and another packet of Walkers. Not like Spain, see? You’ve still got your dignity, see? Still got your culture, ain’t ya? Hey! Stick the telly on! It’s kick off in five minutes. Arrrrrsenal! Good Lad, Pedro.”

    “Si, Senor Gayden. Puta la madre, puta la hija, eh Senor?”

    “Err, absolutely. Top Banana, Pedro old son, cheers.”

11. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:36 pm   Paul D. Waite
    
    

    > there will be no day light from this mess for ever. The UK will end up a third world country

    Is he saying that third-world countries can’t afford daylight?

12. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:53 pm   NW Simon
    
    

    If anything they seem to be able to afford too much.

13. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:53 pm   Gilbert Wham
    
    

    “wonder if there is a spanish equlivalent of hys complaining about the lazy stupid british people that end up immigrating over there.”

    Er, I think that’s just called ‘Spain’. I’m fairly sure they don’t have a specific forum for discussing something so eminently dislikeble. Would you?

14. on 23 Jun 2008 at 1:56 pm   James not from Sussex
    
    

    Presumably they just do it openly to their faces. Not like the average immigrant speaka da lingo, is it?

15. on 23 Jun 2008 at 2:04 pm   The Gnome Secretary
    
    

    Shitbitchfuck.

16. on 23 Jun 2008 at 2:31 pm   Rodafowa
    
    

    Is he really complaining that New Labour are too socialist?

    Blimey.

17. on 23 Jun 2008 at 2:45 pm   Rich (MMath)(Oxon)
    
    

    It’s nice that he wishes us all the best though.

    We’re going to need it in the fight against tax or Polish people or whatever is going to make us 3rd world next year.

18. on 23 Jun 2008 at 3:32 pm   Em
    
    

    There’s this: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/7464107.stm
    about the plight of UK immigrants in Spain…?

    The article linking to the comments page started: “With a copy of the Daily Mail on the cafe table, Eric Summers orders a white coffee for himself and a tonic water for wife Viola - in fluent Spanish”

    Now I speak precisely no Spanish at all - but I reckon I could just about manage to spit out ‘caffe con leche’ and ‘agua’ without the help of the daily flail and a BBC reporter.

19. on 23 Jun 2008 at 3:49 pm   Mr Cat
    
    

    That BBC piece is brilliant. Its somehow manages to drain every ounce of sympathy that one may feel for the “hardship” these people endure and simply replaces it with the hope that the situation worsens until they all take their pathetic lives…

    Take Brenda for example

    To get office work here you need fluent Spanish. I have lessons and a teacher for one-to-one lessons but it’s difficult to keep it all in my brain!

    Don’t you just HATE those Spaniards… asking that you speak their language to get a job.

    Then theres poor old Ron

    Until recently I played golf three times a week but I’ve decided to give that up for a while. It’s partly for financial reasons.

    Its mainly because you’re rubbish at golf though isn’t it… admit it!

    But its Audrey and Allen who really get my Paella in a twist:

    Instead of eating out three times a week it’s just once or twice. We have to start thinking whether we can really justify paying 50 to 70 euros for this meal out for the two of us.

    When we do go out, we really notice how quiet the restaurants are.

    I eat English here anyway. I don’t like Spanish food and never will so expect to pay more if we go to the English butchers and buy the imported food.

    Words fail me…..

20. on 23 Jun 2008 at 4:05 pm   burnel
    
    

    I’m glad you fucked off to Spain,you ignorant twat. Not that you will be in Spain, but Costa del Blackpool eating pies.

21. on 23 Jun 2008 at 4:09 pm   ceedoubleu
    
    

    Well Audrey, the fact that the restaurants are quiet is probably a lot to do with the fact that they are serving crap food for dribbling old people like you.

22. on 23 Jun 2008 at 4:12 pm   Em
    
    

    @ Mr Cat

    That food comment was the link I clicked on… Why the damned woman can’t cook Spanish lamp chops (or whatever) instead of ’specially imported ‘English’ [read: Welsh or Kiwi] ones is utterly beyond me.

23. on 23 Jun 2008 at 4:29 pm   Mr Cat
    
    

    If you don’t love Spanish food so much why did you go live there?

24. on 23 Jun 2008 at 5:29 pm   CM
    
    

    Is he really complaining that New Labour are too socialist?

    Blimey.

    Yes. Presumably, he hasn’t yet noticed that the Spanish government under José Luis Rodriguez Zapatero is far more left wing than the British government, going all out for spend spend spend, prioritising women’s and gay rights, and declaring an amnesty on illegal immigrants.

    Hopefully, Zapatero will soon spend spend spend on a red-faced Brit expat cull. Easily accomplished via a mass lager contamination, or the printing of an ancient Egyptian curse on page 5 of the Daily Mail.

25. on 23 Jun 2008 at 6:30 pm   Alex
    
    

    Judging from the godawful puns in the titles, I’d say the BBC isn’t taking the plight of these bell-ends seriously.

26. on 23 Jun 2008 at 7:42 pm   773
    
    

    I suspect that Mark Gayden, the small-minded lager-swilling racist hypocrite, left the UK for reasons connected to his conviction for fraud in 2004.

    Mad from Barking: IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE IT’S TRUE. Although the more I think about it, the less I want to laugh and the more I want to either weep like a pathetic baby, or channel my unfocussed rage and cleanse the world of stupids.

27. on 23 Jun 2008 at 9:18 pm   norbert
    
    

    These are absolutely my favourite kind of fuckwit. I was shagging some English bird who had moved to Estepona on the Costa del Sol last year and her motley collection of English expat friends were all so risibly predictible in their moaning about England going to the dogs because it’s full of foreigners. Their utter failure to see even the slightest irony in their situation - not one of the lazy, arrogant cunts had bothered to even learn the slightest bit of Spanish - was as absurd as it was cock-achingly tragic. I dumped her once Easyjet flights to Malaga started getting over £50 a pop.

28. on 23 Jun 2008 at 9:48 pm   Dr M. Funk
    
    

    Yes, a third world country. That’s what we’ll be living in. As opposed to the one you’re currently living in with it’s lack of health service and other government based provisions. Ours may not be world class but are definitely still superior to the big fat fuck all you’ll get when what’s left of your heart finally pops you fat ignorant goat worrier. Hope you’ve got decent insurance.

    Oh, no I don’t.

29. on 23 Jun 2008 at 11:12 pm   sack
    
    

    Gutted…. I’m off to Spain soon. Nothing against the UK - just that I have a Spanish girlfriend, job lined up there and I fancy a bit of sunshine. I like it, so why don’t I go live there?

    The one thing I dread is running into all this whining ex-pats bitching that the summer is too hot, the locals don’t speak English and the measurements are all in metric. Hopefully when I get fluent in Spanish (which is basic courtesy really - it’s their bloody country and language after all) I can just fake an inability to speak English and not have to listen to them.

    ¡Vete a mierda, cabrones!

30. on 24 Jun 2008 at 12:55 am   Clamchowder
    
    

    Dr M Funk: The annoying thing is that when his heart IS ready to pop, the fucker will be straight back here to make use of the NHS faster than you can say ’socialist utopia’.

    I have first hand experience of these fuckers who disappear off to warm countries, claiming that the UK has ‘gone to the dogs’ only to come rushing back when they start feeling poorly. And to be quite frank it really steams my piss! So I’m off for a lie down before I have to emigrate…

31. on 24 Jun 2008 at 8:50 am   billyo
    
    

    Clamchowder, we’d better hope it’s a quick death then. Maybe choking on a bone of his “English” KFC.

32. on 01 Aug 2008 at 2:10 am   Fuck Immigrants
    
    

    Fuck immigrants.

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