Permanently Bewildered23 Jul 2008 12:22 pm

Who Will Rid Me Of These Turbulent Badgers?

By Nelson

Blah blah council workers.

They deserve a pay decreace if you ask me. What good have they done in your local are recently. Cos in mine they havent done a darn thing. Our roads are never repaired, yet we are paying a stupid sum in tax towards it. We have no local facilities in our area yet are paying the council £1000s to fund these things. According to our local council a badger has more rights to live in the area than the people who pay to live here. I dont like them, get rid of the lot of them.
i should be working, Cambridge, United Kingdom

Right on. I mean, I’m not badgerist. Some of ‘em are alright. I’ll say this for the badgers, they’re very hard-working. But you can’t trust ‘em. There’s probably 15 of them living in that set. And they’re sending half the money they earn back to their family in Badgerland. Fucking badgers.

37 Responses to “Who Will Rid Me Of These Turbulent Badgers?”

  1. on 23 Jul 2008 at 12:40 pm   Rich(MMath)(Oxon)

    If there’s anything I’ve learnt from this, it’s to never ask “i should be working” about anything.

  2. on 23 Jul 2008 at 12:54 pm   Caz

    TRUE STORY- my cousin was evicted by Cambridge City Council so badgers could move into her house.

  3. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:01 pm   Steve

    He’s probably more pissed off because badgers are both black or white. Are they indigenous white working class salt of the earth overtaxed overworked common sense British badgers, or are they coming over here exploding, taking our jobs, using our wheelie bins and being pandered to by Nu Liar Bore?

    WHY ISN’T CLOWN DOING ANYTHING ABOUT THIS?

  4. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:17 pm   bigruss

    i should be working instead of sitting writing drivel in my sordid little grief pit.

  5. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:23 pm   Gilbert Wham

    I am ‘working from home’ which means I can leave inane comments on blogs, download porn and sit round in my underpants.

  6. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:25 pm   Dalek13

    I heard they’re planning a cull of Cambridge. Filthy badger scum.

  7. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:31 pm   Moletta

    If you’re going to complain about people not doing their jobs - to the point of suggesting they have a pay cut - it might make you look a tad less hypocritical if you don’t whinge about it using the name ‘i should be working’.

  8. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:57 pm   AsbO bAZ

    newts!!!11!!1!

    tHEY JUST CLOSED THE m6 Permanenetly SOUTH OF kUTSFORD sERV ICES COS A FAMILY OF ASYLUM NEWTS HAVE SQUATTED IN A POND five hundred yards FROM THE HARD SHOULDER!!1!!

    aT LEAST bADGERS WORK!

  9. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:58 pm   Mr Cat

    i should be working should be learning some basic grammar too.

  10. on 23 Jul 2008 at 1:59 pm   dutchthecap

    dont like badgers dont like skwirrels dont like cats dont like mice dont like dogs. do like magnifying glasses do like pepper spray do like mustard do like rat poyzin tried out that mustard on the arse trick to see what it felt like myself. Fucking sore thatll teach em little furry shits

  11. on 23 Jul 2008 at 2:00 pm   dutchthecap

    fucking HATE newts scroungin bastards

  12. on 23 Jul 2008 at 2:02 pm   Don_Durito

    At least he recognises that the council’s remit extends beyond instituting their draconian Islamofacist bin-emptying regime. I know it’s only badgers, roads, and unspecified nonexistent ‘facilities’ but it’s a start. He’s probably considered an intellectual giant on HYS.

  13. on 23 Jul 2008 at 2:04 pm   Simon (not from East Anglia)

    No local facilities in Cambridge? Last time I looked it had a pretty good Polytechnic, a river running through it and a rather good museum or two, this twat probably doesn’t know that. It’s Badgers’ Rights policies were also groundbreaking, based as they were on measuring their level of intelligence against local HYS’ers and allocating housing accordingly. I should be working too but i’m a Civil Servant and consequently do fuck-all all day.

  14. on 23 Jul 2008 at 2:06 pm   devolute

    Ban this stripey-nosed filth now!

  15. on 23 Jul 2008 at 2:42 pm   philbert

    I don’t mind badgers, right, but if they’re going to come over here, take our jobs and steal our women then they could at least learn the language. Whatever happened to Human Rights, eh?

  16. on 23 Jul 2008 at 3:17 pm   dirigible (XXL)

    Badgers don’t have human rights.

    But the government won’t gas them to stop them spreading bovine TB because they don’t want the negative publicity. This is according to Private Eye, which decides whether it’s a good thing or not by flipping a coin each issue.

  17. on 23 Jul 2008 at 3:36 pm   Rotwatcher

    <blockquote.But the government won’t gas them to stop them spreading bovine TB because they don’t want the negative publicity. This is according to Private Eye, which decides whether it’s a good thing or not by flipping a coin each issue.

    They might as well gas the starlings for all the effect it would have on bovine TB.

  18. on 23 Jul 2008 at 3:39 pm   Kelvin

    This is according to Private Eye, which decides whether it’s a good thing or not by flipping a coin each issue.

    Actually I find them pretty consistent on which subjects they disapprove of. Namely, all of them.

  19. on 23 Jul 2008 at 3:39 pm   Rotwatcher

    Pissflaps. Bollockquotes. Robert Bruce to the rescue …

    But the government won’t gas them to stop them spreading bovine TB because they don’t want the negative publicity. This is according to Private Eye, which decides whether it’s a good thing or not by flipping a coin each issue.

    They might as well gas the starlings for all the effect it would have on bovine TB.

  20. on 23 Jul 2008 at 4:09 pm   hillhunt

    I had a brush with a badger once. It was a close shave.

  21. on 23 Jul 2008 at 4:22 pm   Mr Cat

    According to our local council a badger has more rights to live in the area than the people who pay to live here.

    OK - let me get this straight in the context of this TB thing - which I’m guessing is his argument.

    Essentially he is saying that in his area Badgers have more rights than humans because our government has elected not to gas them all to death.

    From which we can infer that in his area people are all being gassed to death?

    Has he stumbled unwittingly on some modern day holocaust in Cambridge?

    Or is he wittering hyberbole like a blathering twunt into the black hole of HYS in the hope that it will echo back to him as profound truth?

  22. on 23 Jul 2008 at 4:25 pm   Bodger and Badger

    BadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger

  23. on 23 Jul 2008 at 4:30 pm   jpr

    BadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerBadgerbadgerbadgerbadg

    Mushroom?

  24. on 23 Jul 2008 at 4:31 pm   jpr

    Blockquote Overflow At Line 01 …

  25. on 23 Jul 2008 at 4:40 pm   Don_Durito

    From which we can infer that in his area people are all being gassed to death?

    And yet in the same breath he still has the temerity to complain that his town lacks facilities!

    What a poison arrow frog’s spunkcatcher he really is.

  26. on 23 Jul 2008 at 5:18 pm   dutchthecap

    dont like badgers

  27. on 23 Jul 2008 at 5:43 pm   Dingleberry

    “I don’t mind badgers, right, but if they’re going to come over here, take our jobs and steal our women then they could at least learn the language. Whatever happened to Human Rights, eh?”
    philbert

    as far as I’m concerned, the moment they decided to become a badger they forfeited they right to human rights. Why shouldn’t we gas them? THEY’RE TRYING TO KILL US!

  28. on 23 Jul 2008 at 5:44 pm   DC

    Its quite distressing to someone that read “Wind in the Willows” as a child that anyone might consider gassing Badger.

    Toad, now he’s asking for it.

  29. on 23 Jul 2008 at 5:53 pm   pete willis

    i read this and thought ‘gutted, they’ve just completely re-tarmaced all the roads near me’. then i scroll down to see we live in the same fucking place!

  30. on 23 Jul 2008 at 7:35 pm   a.m

    no wonder the council think a badger has more rights than you, considering what a boring cunt you are

  31. on 23 Jul 2008 at 7:36 pm   Gob Beldof

    Its one rule for the badgers and another rule for the rest of us, once again the PC brigade have come storming in without any awareness of the ‘facts’ spreading their commnonist greeen nonse sense manure all over the green fields of truth.

  32. on 23 Jul 2008 at 7:47 pm   sharon

    Badger! Badger! Badger!

  33. on 23 Jul 2008 at 9:29 pm   The Gnome Secretary

    WHY ISN’T CLOWN DOING ANYTHING ABOUT THIS?

    Fucko the Clown? I heard he’s busy measuring the strength of his own farts by breaking wind on childrens faces, then seeing how much they wince.

    There’s probably 15 of them living in that set. And they’re sending half the money they earn back to their family in Badgerland.

    Nelson: what’s really fucked up is that they pay the same council tax as me, where there’s only two people living in my house. Fucking scum. BRING BACK MAGGIE, BRING BACK THE POLL TAX!!1

  34. on 23 Jul 2008 at 10:41 pm   Paul D. Waite

    I am ‘working from home’ which means I can leave inane comments on blogs, download porn and sit round in my underpants.

    It is pretty awesome.

  35. on 23 Jul 2008 at 11:31 pm   AngryDave

    Dirty little hairy bastards, they kill bikers too.
    Gas them all!!!!

  36. on 24 Jul 2008 at 9:27 am   Scaryduck

    I am ‘working from home’ which means I can leave inane comments on blogs, download porn and sit round in my underpants.

    That pretty much sums up my life.

    *wanks*

    *cries*

  37. on 24 Jul 2008 at 12:51 pm   Flid Frenstone

    Thatcher! Thatcher! Badger’s Snatch, er…