Anyone of working age that eats coco pops ought to be shot. Perhaps you should go postal rather than changing jobs. Bit harsh I admit but with a certain amount of thought (and quality malt whisky) it makes perfect sense.

LAWL!

“you can’t argue with the evidence mate, I feel grrrrreat”.

Your colleague, Tony the Tiger, was clearly an idiot and you rightly moved jobs.

One particularly simian faced colleague of mine insists that “he’d rather have a bowl of Coco Pops” every morning. I too am job hunting.

No wonder I’m fucked.

You’re sick…

I like that in a person.

Tea addiction is a serious blight on our society. It’s more widespread in use than Meth and Crack and deemed more socially acceptable. So it’s a worse problem. Even the Church of England drink the stuff. It’s peddled by furriners like the Reds in China and in them countries what send all them immigrants to bastions of upstanding Englishness like Leicester and Tower Hamlets and Salford.

Through this evil trade we’re contributing to the economies of these furrin places and it’s probably funding terrorism and immigration, or something like that.

It’s probably responsible for huge swathes of crime in Ingerlund. Serious stuff like knifecrimes, falling property prices and being Muslim without due care and attention. The sooner we remove this dangerous drug from the streets the better.

My Shatner’s Bassoon is completely screwed from taking this stuff. It’s dangerous - just like that Di-Hydro Monoxide. I demand that we form a campaign to ensure that this so-called government does something about this vile drug. Drinking just over a gallon of water a day, (none of that furrin metric stuff here thank-you!,) it the least we can do to combat this evil menace.

*Admittedly I do drink REALLY strong Assam with milk and two teaspoons of china-white.

I’m also addicted to nice food, moderate exercise, and wearing socks.

It’s plagued me for most of my life.