Never understood the excuses people give for reading lad-mags. Surely it’s far less embarrassing to say you got it for a good hearty wank than admit to reading the articles.
Angie/Angela from B’ham/Birmingham is also not a fan:
why dont women’s mags have naked men in it, doing poses?
we dont degrade men like so called lad mags (porn) do about women.
Me and my husband will teach our son to respect women.
I can’t believe women who encourage this and let partners and husband’s buy it, your letting women down, this is disgusting porn with no respect for women, it treats them like sex objects. Some of these mags show more than they should, not just the top half, no wonder theres rapes and paodophiles. ban it all.
angie, B,ham
You think men’s magazines degrade women Angie, you should try reading women’s magazines. Yech.
I agree Denise Kettle, these men are sad, perverts, In need, lacking in something, paedophiles in the making.
Any men that don’t find these mags offensive must be one of these.
These mags are disgusting and sick, degrading, this sort of stuff encourages violence, rapes and paedophiles, these mags must be banned, it should go to Parliament.
If kids want to know about the human body and sex there should be proper books, not this disgusting stuff, the women in it have no respect for themselves.
angela, Birmingham
We’re clearly dealing with an embittered sexist so clueless about the world and the opposite sex that she assumes anyone who disagrees with her must be somehow sexually dysfunctional.
Coincidentally, this was sent in by J, an embittered sexist so clueless about the world and the opposite sex that he assumes anyone who disagrees with him must be somehow sexually dysfunctional:
top prize goes to this dried up lezzer, Angela from Birmingham
I have no idea Denise Kettle is, or what she said, but clearly she is someone whom Angela holds in high regard, and I can only conclude that she is a mong as well
No Angie, your magazines don’t humiliate men, you have every advert where men are portrayed as simple buffoons to do that for you.
As a man, I can tell you that shit unfunny adverts are worse than any humiliation any woman has ever suffered. Also, with all that hot girl-on-girl action, you wonder how any lezzer could ever dry up.
99 Responses to “Paedos in the Making”
Violence?
Why not just go the whole hog, and say that it encourages stealth tax, dole-scrounging and Islam too?
Lads mags are crap anyway. They used to get me off years ago when my hormones were in full torrent but now they’re just not, er, porny enough.
Nowadays it takes a serious dose of hardcore action to float my boat.
Shit, Angela’s right, I’m on the slippery slope. It’ll be violent rape and kiddie porn next. Maybe I should get myself down to a peedotrishen - I think they help sick fucks like me.
Yeah, right on. I went to one of those ‘galleries’ the other day and it was full, FULL i tell you! of pictures and statchoos of naked men doing poses. I felt so degraded i was compelled to knifecrime myself into a canaletto. AND THERE WERE CHILDREN THERE TOO BEING ENCOURAGED INTO PEEDOFICATION BY THESE IMAGES. FACTone1one!!oneoneoneon
So let me get this straight.
Someone sent this - you liked it enough to use it, but then launched into an attack on the person who sent it by quoting their accompanying message and slagging them off?
I’m not saying I agree or even care about what J wrote here but its smug in the extreme to make a clever little pop at something someone has found for you and then a clever little self satisfied smug pop at the people who found it.
What I like about the world is that J and angela have so much in common - They clearly have exactly the same mindset - and yet, to the immense benefit of the species, their rabid hate of each other will prevent them from producing überfuckwit offspring.
Definition of ‘mong’:
Woman who won’t sleep with me, not that I would anyway, coz, well, her teeth are crooked and her nose is too big, and she has the cheek to turn ME down, she’s got to be some kind of frigid lesbian like all the other feminist sluts, practically every women I meet turns out to be a mong in the end.
You know, I was looking at some pictures of that Lucy Pinder the other day, and her large womanly breasts and curvy feminine hips made me want to go and have sex with someone whose secondary sexual characteristics were entirely undeveloped.
i think vicky is probably a mong too
I can’t believe women who encourage this and let partners and husband’s buy it, your letting women down, this is disgusting porn with no respect for women, it treats them like sex objects. Some of these mags show more than they should, not just the top half, no wonder theres rapes and paodophiles. ban it all.
angie, B,ham
Which one of my fellow posters is an A-level English exam marker? He’d have a field day on the construction and content of that paragraph.
She might want to worry a bit less about her son knocking one out to a harmless jazz mag and take the time to go to a few English classes.
To be fair, if you can’t actually understand any of the writing stuff, FHM would look like it was just tawdry softcore porn. Rather than, as it is, being tawdry softcore porn with occasional recipes.
Woo, we’re clever.
Mr Cat, that’s the risk we all run when sending emails to people who are dedicated to taking the piss out of stupid, outdated, nonsensical comments.
Maybe they could add a disclaimer:
1. Only submit a comment if you can refrain, for a couple of lines of text, from sounding just as much of an animal fanny as the person you want us to tear to shreds.
2. We’re a bit smug because we’ve got a good website. Sorry if that comes across sometimes.
I only buy FHM for the competitions though.
“To be fair, if you can’t actually understand any of the writing stuff, FHM would look like it was just tawdry softcore porn. Rather than, as it is, being tawdry softcore porn with occasional recipes.”
I only buy FHM and Asian Babes for the recipes, and the gash.
I’ll forgive you for not knowing this jimbo, but I’m from Lancashire, which makes me a ‘minger’.
Some of these mags show more than they should, not just the top half.
Fair point. God gave us tummy buttons so we’d know where the unacceptably rude bits of us started.
quote:…”Fair point. God gave us tummy buttons so we’d know where the unacceptably rude bits of us started.”
True. Mine has a sign in it warning travellers “Here there be dragons…!”
Did I miss the copy of Nuts where they showed child pr0n in a bid to encourage speedofillia? Shurely someone would have mentioned it on the news or summinck?
PS. I don’t read lads mags, but not because angela thinks they’re degrading to women, but because they’re all fucking shite.
I wonder if she realises her son probably has unlimited access to free internet porn proper. She’d probably keel over, or leave the gas on when they go to bed to save the family turning into a bunch of internecine pediatrician rapists.
no worries vicky. i’m from birmingham, so i should have just gone with “woman”.
parp parp
I though a paodophile was a dinosaur or something. Pretty sure it’s the peedos we need to be looking out for, with they’re apparent obsession with busty nude women (yes, I know it’s been done by kelvin but I’ve typed it now and I’m not taking it back).
I couldn’t help finding something a tiny bit ominous in Angie’s statement about her and Mr. Angela teaching their son to respect women. I get the distinct impression that she’ll be teaching it him with a stick. Possibly with nails in, i’m not sure.
WHO WILL BAN THESE DEVIL DOGS? Sorry, got a bit nostalgic for a moment there. I seem to be developing Daily Express Tourette’s. RIP-OFF BRITAIN! NEW TWIST IN DIANA DEATH MYSTERY!
You couldn’t make it up! Except I did.
mrcat is j AICMFP
i don’t see how these magazines are degrading to women, they all seem to be smiling in the pictures.
As in “i think vicky is probably a woman too”?
I can live with that.
In fact, having posted five comments in ten minutes on one thread… I’ll go away and start living with it immediately.
I meant 4 comments. Except that it’s five now. But then… (goes for a little lie down)
if asked, how many sexcrimers would answer ‘yes’ to the question ‘as a young person did your parents ever try to get you to respect wimminfolk by telling you that a lady’s downstairs is evil and should never be looked at?’
i’m guessing almost all of them. well done angela, you’ve set your boy on a one-way journey to nonceville
I think there might be respect issues between Mr Vicky and hisgoodladywife. I would have thought little mr Vicky would learn respect for women through observing the behaviour of his father.
If his father wasn’t knocking the crap out of his wife for messing with his porn stash that is.
I reckon Vicky featured in Bukkake Sluts 4 and has felt bad about it ever since.
How does angela type under her burka? must be hard to see what keys you are pressing?
Not even if I get down on my knees and beg?
Sorry Vicky, but I’m afraid that by disagreeing with J on something related to feminism you do automatically qualify as a mong.
And a lezbo.
“These mags are disgusting and sick, degrading, this sort of stuff encourages violence, rapes and paedophiles, these mags must be banned, it should go to Parliament.”
PARLIAMENT? Are you fucking joking. The only people more sexually depraved than the members (fnarr) of the House of Commons are the members (fnarr fnarr) off the House of Lords.
The only reason that the RtHon Spankington-Handcuff hasnt heard of Nuts magazine is because he spends all weekend reading Compromised Choirboys Extreme (import).
the imported copies are rubbish. they have little blue dots over the cassocks.
i realise that that last comment possibly shows my age a little. the kids today’ll be all like ‘what? little blue dots on the porny bits? where’s the fun in that?’
well quite.
It’s not as though I haven’t offered, but they keep turning me down.
They were quite complimentary though, saying something about the ‘feelings of north sea air’ they got when looking at my pictures, I forget what exactly.
Oh yeah. Nausea. That was it.
Women should probably be angry that their fellas are wasting money on lads mags when the internet is full of much better porn.
And it’s free. Which was my main point, I just forgot to type it.
Free porn? Free until ZaNuLiarBore and Gordon Clown get on the case and stealth tax it.
You’ll have to pay for it then - welcome to rip off Britian! You couldn’t make it up.
lads mags don’t have gash in them.
“If kids want to know about the human body and sex there should be proper books”
Those would be school text books would they not? And endless other tomes on anatomy, sex and love.
Do you think that Vicky learned what little she knows about love and the human form from razz mags?
“When you “ogle” a photo of a half-naked woman, do you fantasise about being held in her fake-tanned arms, or do you dream about something a bit more sinister? And this is exactly what the difference is between men and women. We appreciate beauty whilst you appreciate the size of certain body parts!
Marina, London ”
Dead right Marina. Fannies like an F1 wind tunnel do it for me every time. The bigger the better. Any woman could have a face like a welders bench but if she echoes like Cheddar Gorge i’m chimping off in seconds.
Men’s magazines degrade *men*, surely?
You are a man, so therefore you are interested in retouched pictures of the augmented breasts of noneties, sport, violence and rubbish jokes.
The girls paid four figures to use each others hands as bras for 10 minutes are not the victims here. It’s the blokes paying two quid to unsatisfyingly masturbate over said pictures in a lets-pretend-it’s-still-the-mid-ninties pseudo-ironic fashion.
Oliver
Chimping off? Classic!
Pseudo-ironic wanks are always the most satisfying.
Getting a bit old for all that though now. A nice cup of tea and Coronation Street on the box is about my pace.
Good point. Alex, please remember to distinguish in future between people who are part of our little club and people who aren’t. WE SHULD LOOK AFTER ARE OWN.
Poor Marina from London. Now I’m no expert, but I’m suspecting that lovelife based on everything more than a fake-tan enhanced chaste cuddle being “sinister” might possibly be on the slightly unsatisfactory side.
“Stop trying to kiss me, you sinister, underhand, wicked, machiavellian husband!”
Wish I could have a pseudo-ironic tug, but sadly I’m at work. And it’s been categorised as sinister.
*whispering*
apart from her dreadful grammar i actually agree with some of angela’s statements…
Is it Vicky or Angela? I’m confused now.
Does this pandagash actually realise that Michael Gove is a child-raping Tory fuckface and nothing to do with “ZaNuLiarbore”?
Um, why are you lambasting poor Vicky (ONE OF ARE OWN as Nelson puts it)? Do you actually mean Angela there?
Methinks Angie has caught her son boxing the jesuit over the Kay’s Catalogue again.
Why? Can Bootsie not afford to BUY his own scuff? Honestly. Why do slebs get it for free while the rest of us have to scrape the remnants of our Giros together when we fancy knocking the Pope’s cap off?
Lisa, even the parts that are factually incorrect or plain mad? Brave.
So which of these are you then?:
a) mong
b) minger
c) lezzer
d) ‘Brummie woman’
e) lezbo
Tell me!
So, has Angie never seen a Christian Dior advert?
Gah! Knocking one out over a catalogue has never been the same since they started photoshopping away nipples & bush from the see-thru lingerie.
DAMN YOU ADOBE!
I think angie is worrying mainly because if this is how she reacts to FHM I suspect things will go very wrong if anyone ever tells her about actual porn. And while she does broadly speaking have a point, I doubt that she is approaching the issue from a humourless feminist viewpoint as is proper but as a raging string-’em-up sex-is-evil bundle of indignation who doesn’t know how to separate her rage into separate coherent points.
Obviously I take that back if it turns out that she and her husband have explained the significance of the clitoris to their hapless offspring. Preferably with diagrams.
Samwel
Sorry. Yes I mean Angela. Absolutley not Vicky.
I should be sexcrimed.
Clitoris? Isn’t that a climbing plant?
You do know I’m Mr. Vicky, don’t you?
The sex-crazed herd of rhinoceros is in the post.
Awaiting rhinoceros for punishment.
Related to the triffid, I believe. Highly dangerous and to be avoided at all costs.
I just think there is a difference between what people say in emails and what they wilfully publish on the net in threads like this & HYS - the latter is fair game to be ridiculed (like this), but the former is on dodgier ground, its been submitted privately - so even if it is stupid in the extreme it seems a bit smug to make a point of sharing and ridiculing it.
Not sure why I’m saying this cos I hate serious debate on this site… just seemed a little bit too self satisfied for comfort.
Typically we can tell the difference between people who are just bringing posts to our attention and people who are hoping for their response to be published along with the comment. J was definitely the latter. So if he was hoping for it to be published for the world to see I don’t see a huge gulf between the two contexts.
Lads mags are shoite. But given what is in Ladies mags they can’t be that bad. At least the lads mags don’t try and cover up their intrinsic shittiness and instead walow in it happily.
I have a friend who is an editor/copy writer for a few of the womens mags (Bella for instance) who has the unfortunate responsibility of going through articles submitted to the mag by readers. It’s tragic she has to do that, but even worse that someone actually thinks its worth printing that kind of bollocks.
Depends who you’re dealing with. I expect Angela has a veritable jungle down there. Scientific FACT!!
Vicky?
Alex?
J?
Angela?
Im confused now, which one is the Peedo?
I am reading this directly above the offices of one such hell-rag. Recently, their regular spooooky spin-off mag had a headline reading “I found my soul-mate with a slice of PSYCHIC WEDDING CAKE!”. I’ll be keeping that one handy in my wallet for the next time someone calls me a Nazi just because I think we need to be starting up extermination camps to stamp out this sort of nonsense.
Since everyone on this thread including angela and presumably denise kettle is familiar with lads mags to some extent I think the only safe course of action is to regard them all as peedos.In fact I think we are all the same peedo.
Depends who you’re dealing with. I expect Angela has a veritable jungle down there. Scientific FACT!!
She probably doesn’t know because she’s never seen herself below the carefully-Biroed hazard line around her waist. She doesn’t strike me as a hairy feminist, though, since we usually use bigger words and fewer inexplicable paedo references in our insane ranting. Maybe she shaves with her eyes shut? This is all very confusing.
I’m glad I don’t read lad’s mags so I don’t have to suffer the wrath of angela.
Wonder whether she’d approve of my tool pron. Have you seen page 126 of the latest Machine Mart catalogue? There’s some sexy looking compressors in there…
“Smug in the extreme”
Pretty much sums up this onanistic little website. Don’t you have any prep to do, public schoolboys?
Hello J! Not happy with the way the article turned out, I take it?
I don’t think any denial I could make towards the onanism charge would..err.. stand up in court but I do object to being called a public schoolboy. I’m a yob from the comp and too old to pass for a schoolboy of any kind despite my best efforts.
and btw Dorothy Parker named her parrot Onan because it spilled its seed on the ground.
“well done angela, you’ve set your boy on a one-way journey to nonceville”
Actually, doesn’t “Nonceville” sound like a lovely sleepy town in Louisiana? Like maybe Clifton Chenier used to play a semi-regular slot there sometime in the mid-sixties. “TONIGHT: ZYDECO AT THE NONCEVILLE BALLROOM”.
Is it just me?
Nonceville sounds a bit more gritty than that to me. Like Last Train To Nonceville. Or Sundown in Nonceville. Um, that last one one was not meant to sound quite that wrong.
feminist, so i guess all of the above
top prize goes to this dried up lezzer, Angela from Birmingham
=========================
as in “medically dry”?
I don’t have a problem with lad mags. What I do have a problem with is scantily clad women appearing magazines that have bugger all to do with sex. Like gadget magazines. Or do you men folk really decide what tv to buy on the basis of the bint draped over it?
I’m not the lad mag ideal anyway. MarioKart > sex
You misunderstand. The purpose of said bint is for the magazine’s art director to ogle and with any luck bed. Nothing to do with selling anything.
Are all feminists from Birmingham?
Mal, thanks for the explanation. I’ve clearly over-Wii’d my poor little girly brain.
I pity the blokes who read lad mags and think women all look like that.
Firstly, alkaline trio fans are generally better than everyone else.
Secondly, I’m a humourless, bra-burning feminist, and I’ve never even been to Birmingham.
And thirdly, I do think Angela has a point of sorts, even if it is lost in a vaccuum of gibber. There are men who read lad’s mags and watch porn and get their entire sexual education from there…which is quite worrying. You just know there’s a large contingent of spotty teen boys out there who can’t understand why their girlfriend doesn’t want to be double penetrated by two Great Danes.
you say that like it’s a criticism.
(and do they have double-up doggy sex in ‘lads mags’? I’m impressed. I thought it was just nips and cheeks, I’m off to Patel’s Newspapers…)
It’s probably just a matter of time, dingleberry. For now, stick with google.
I read one of those “lad mags” once and, on
page 27, it featured a recipe on how to cook human babies. I think anybody who reads this pornogrpahic exploitation should be forced by the police to spend six months remedial therapy in a lap-dancing club. That’ll learn ‘em.
1. Only submit a comment if you can refrain, for a couple of lines of text, from sounding just as much of an animal fanny as the person you want us to tear to shreds.</I.
Yeah, every so often reading the comments here on SYB can be a bit like the end of Animal Farm…which has to be online somewhere.
Aha, here it is!
Oink?
Stella! Nooooooooooooo! For God’s sake Nooooooooooo! NOT Animal pissing Farm. Every chuffing HYS nob, when hoping to look ‘litary and heducated’ cites either 19 sodding 84 or Animal bastard Farm.
*cries* *bangs fists*
The aim of SYB is to vent all the toxins and bilious tensions aquirred from HYS and if there is one thing more than any other on HYS that makes me contemplate suicide it is the constant confirmation that Jo ‘Einstein’ Public has not read a book since his poor old English teacher guided him through two of the most simplistic political fairytales in the history of writing…. Animal Baa Baa Farm and 19 ‘boots forever!’ 84.
AND… AND WHICH IS MORE… THE RIGHTWING NUTCASES CONSTANTLY USE POOR OLD COMMIE ORWELL TO JUSTIFY WHATEVER HANG ‘EM FLOG ‘EM SHITE THEY ARE HOLLERING FOR…
*collapses on floor in uncontrollable sobbing*
I can’t take it anymore.
I
don’t
want
to
live!
HYS totally confirms that life is brutal, utterly meaningless and grossly absurd.
Stella just say this over and over, ok…
“Speak YOur Branes; Good
Have Your Say; Baaaaaaaad”
and you’ll be fine.
I’m struggling to see the link between an adult woman choosing to pose semi naked (and it is her choice, no matter what we say), and paedophilia.
Oh, that will be because there isn’t one!
Maybe I’ll Catch Fire -
“I’m not the lad mag ideal anyway. MarioKart > sex”
Noooo. It’s MarioKart *then* hot, sweaty victory sex.
I guess these lad’s mags really are out of hand.Still you have to admire there stamina
“and I can only conclude that she is a mong as well”
lol
p.s. smug patrol - ‘onanistic’ pretty much sums up the internet. pay attention, please.
p.p.s. what’s wrong with being sexy?
Final (hopefully) footnote on this one for anyone who is interested.
The circulations of many lads mags are plummeting at an alarming rate. Consequentially the ads that support them are disappearing fast too. Anyone who is genuinely bothered about the effect they are having on today’s ‘lads’ shouldn’t let it keep them awake at night as the whole genre will be more or less dead and buried fairly soon.
Lets face it, why on earth would your average teenager bother buying Nuts, when his iPhone has the real deal on tap whenever and wherever he wants it. It also removes the risk that your mum will find the stuck-together back issues under your bed.
Alex, you have broken the fourth wall, you insulted your audience (well, the contributor) and whilst it was well placed, does this perhaps mean the walls are going to collapse around us?
fuck that, keep ‘em coming.
Why is it that most people who claim to be feminists are just shouty people with to much time? Whenever you have an argument like this there is always some who come out with anti porn arguments saying “im a femenist, and we hate porn”. What about the pro porn femanists (They do exist, and in my opinion have a much stronger argument for freedom of all)
Not that anyone’s reading this thread any more, but I’m a pro-porn feminist.
Maybe if I’d said that at the beginning I wouldn’t have strayed so far into the firing line…
I’d just like to add that I’m a propane feminist.