Armchair Generals and Permanently Bewildered12 Aug 2008 12:21 pm
By Nelson

A comment from the blog of a World Service programme called “World Have Your Say”. Can anybody stand up to the Russians? This chap has an idea.

Now would be a good time for the Georgians to ally with the Chetchians or Muslims to have them come in behind them and tear them a new butt. Then the Nato troops could smuggle in a bunch of stinggers. Russia has to decide if they want to be our allies against really bad Muslim radicals like most of the people who are not Muslim are or whether they want to continue with this empire building and holding thing. Russian troops would not do well in the mountains of Georgia just like they did not do well in Afghanistan. Bomb cities, well yah anybody can do that. Go up in the rocks as an infantry supported by a traditional military. Let the games begin. It would be a really great war for both sides to fight. The true character of man can continue to unfold and all the folks in Russia big towns and cities will eventually begin to complain about why all the kids are disappearing and not coming back.

This is the story of mankind!!

troop on the Oregon coast
troop

Psssst. Don’t tell anyone else in your class, but we’re inviting you to the big, main, secure, secret headquarters tomorrow. We want you to be the Top Chief Of All The Armies.

31 Responses to “Chetchians and Really Bad Muslims”

  1. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:35 pm AC, Peebles

    I bet troop lives in a ’secret’ shed, wears army surplus and reads gun magazines. Oh, and he’s a dog-faced pig-humper.

  2. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:39 pm alt-f4

    The west should create and arm islamic fanatics with mass destruction weapons and send them in to fight the Russians just as we did in Afghanistan and Chechnya. We should take their school kids hostage and slit their little throats one by one live on TV. We must also continue and expand the policies of prohibition of soft drugs, bring in the death sentance for abortionists, ban the teaching of evolution, burn lad mags nazi-style in the street, leave “no options of the table” vis-a-vis Iran, abolish inheritance tax, drill our way out of the energy shortage, bail out corrupt corporate executives at the taxpayer’s expense, privatise social security and, err, did I get them all right Miss? Have I passed the citizenship exam?

  3. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:39 pm AndyS

    yeehaw, anyone can bomb a city. just ask timothy mcveigh. who probably knew troop well.

    how do you tell if a muslim is really bad? do they have to wear badges? this is like having teh bad aids and stuff.

  4. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:40 pm huck

    ‘It would be a really great war for both sides to fight.’

    is it me or does this ring a bell?

  5. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:47 pm John

    War’s great fun and games until someone looses an eye.

  6. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:47 pm davesNotHere

    Rambo^H^H^H^H^HTroop’s right you know, the best way to settle a punch-up is to bring in the neighbours. Especially the really bad ones.

    Problem is they never know when to go home.

  7. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:48 pm John

    or even loses one.

  8. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:50 pm Bad Muslim

    Relax, I’m a christian!

    -BM.

  9. on 12 Aug 2008 at 12:52 pm Oliver

    The Russians should start sending up their space rockets again and then put massive lasers in the sky and then send messages to the aliens so that they come down with even bigger lasers and shoot up both the bad muslims and anyone with bad aids and then the georgians could make friends with the aliens and turn them on the russians and then we can send the paras in and special forces with stephen segal and mr t and ross kemp and they can all have a big fight and the one who wins can get all the losers to give them their ipods or something to show they lost.

    That would be cool.

  10. on 12 Aug 2008 at 1:02 pm zymeck

    troop strikes me as being the type of person who still enjoys drawing pictures of stick men attacking battleships

  11. on 12 Aug 2008 at 1:08 pm alt-f4

    To drop the satire for a moment, I wonder what it would do to this guy’s worldview if he ever found out that Chechen units have been fighting Georgia (or rather Georgian-financed mercenaries) on the Russian side?
    Just as they did in Abkhazia in the early ’90s where the lunatic shakhid Shamil Basayev first made a name for himself. Or if he ever found out that the last surviving refuge for Chechen fanatics, after the mass of the Chechen people turned against them, was in Georgia? And then further learned that it was the Georgians themselves that gave the Russian Airforce overflight permission to clear them out as the area is largely inaccessible from the Georgian side?

    It’s probably a lot simpler to just tell him that if likes Georgians so much he should go fight there. Keep it on his level, as it were.

  12. on 12 Aug 2008 at 1:12 pm Mr Cooper, Headmaster, Oxon

    “Contributed towards some excellent BBC classic comedy. FACT!Shame about his demise, simple as that. End of.”
    Twot O Tron, SYB
    RECOMMENDED 27 people

    *holds up post like a serious headmaster*

    Now I want you boys to look at this and I want you to think very carefully about where your loyalties lie. Because the boy who wrote this quite obviously didn’t think of Sir William’s family before he posted it. For the sake of a cheap, easy laugh he has made many good people very upset. Have Your Say is for adults to discuss adult things, it is NOT for you boys to abuse for your own childish amusement. And if we get a copy-cat spate of *ahem*-O-Tron messages messing up the top of Have Your Say, I shall come down very heavily on those responsible.

    Do I make myself absolutely clear?

  13. on 12 Aug 2008 at 1:25 pm Far-Q

    On a more serious note, Mr Cooper, Headmaster, Oxon, smells of wee wee

  14. on 12 Aug 2008 at 1:30 pm setyourfacestostunned

    One of the closed HYS threads of the last couple of days is “is Guantanamo Bay justified?”. It’s worth a read.

    Observe.

    GB exists through need - simple as that. If the socalled inhumane conditions discourage one terrorist and its inmates are charged it has done its job.

    What I fail to understand is the rights people are willing to give these detainees. They view our/troops lives as cheap why do we not treat theirs the same? They believe it is a war therefore they get treated as soldiers too. They should be treated as they treat others.

    Edward Hunter, Worcester, United Kingdom

  15. on 12 Aug 2008 at 1:52 pm BottleBrain

    Let the games begin.

    Phwoar!

  16. on 12 Aug 2008 at 2:05 pm Morag

    I tried to follow what “troop” was attempting to say but all I heard was “I like to wank to pictures of guns”.

  17. on 12 Aug 2008 at 2:11 pm jimmyhappens

    I would put decent money on ‘Troop’ being the online non-de-plume of Dr Kissinger.

  18. on 12 Aug 2008 at 2:18 pm Far-Q

    I tried to follow what “troop” was attempting to say but all I heard was “I like to wank to pictures of guns”.

    Damn, I didn’t realise I was saying that out loud.

  19. on 12 Aug 2008 at 3:29 pm huck

    “What I fail to understand is the rights people are willing to give these detainees. They view our/troops lives as cheap why do we not treat theirs the same?”

    well, apparently we do, hence the issue

  20. on 12 Aug 2008 at 4:12 pm Don_Durito

    This is the story of mankind!!

    Thanks for enlightening us. You Mastodon’s septic noo-noo.

  21. on 12 Aug 2008 at 4:51 pm Jon

    Troop, you are Tom Clancy, and I claim my 5 pounds!

  22. on 12 Aug 2008 at 5:31 pm Gilbert Wham

    Fuck, huffing lighter gas for an hour would have killed less brain cells than reading that did.

  23. on 12 Aug 2008 at 10:04 pm Rhinestone Choirboy

    You don’t often get to see, even on HYS, a bona fide brainless dickless fucktard of such low calibre as troop. I am genuinely impressed, as I am with his theory that Russian aggression and economic repression of countries weaker than themselves, and the indiscriminate slaughter of thousands of innocent people, would be OK if only the chosen enemies were darkies.

    In the presence of greatness. Truly.

  24. on 12 Aug 2008 at 11:51 pm H.B.

    Good morning, everyone, I’m Henry Blofeld here at the (Grozny) Oval for the first day of this five and a half-year war between the Really Bad Muslims and the Peace-loving Western Murder Squad Select XI. Fantastic summer’s morning here; not a cloud in the sky. Which is good news for the Russians who, as we all know, don’t like it up ‘em. The excitement’s really building for what we all hope will be a really great war…

  25. on 13 Aug 2008 at 8:54 am Rebel

    RAIN STOPPED BATTLE

  26. on 13 Aug 2008 at 9:37 am Lell

    I think “troop” is Ross Kemp.

  27. on 13 Aug 2008 at 10:31 am alt-f4

    Today’s match had to be called off after the crowd invaded the battlefield. Several tanks were overturned, and coins were thrown at some Really Bad Muslim troops, one of whom even had his beard pulled on by a drunken fan.

  28. on 13 Aug 2008 at 10:49 am Throbbe

    What the hell are a ‘bunch of stinggers’? Is this a new racist term for Scots that I wasn’t aware of?

  29. on 13 Aug 2008 at 11:39 am Charles Exford, Oxton

    “troop” probably thinks the Russians are in the process of annexing Atlanta. This is because he is a festering llama’s crack.

  30. on 13 Aug 2008 at 12:38 pm Disgustipated

    Tenner says this guy keeps a worryingly sticky copy of “Guns & Ammo” hidden under his mattress where his Mum will never find it

  31. on 13 Aug 2008 at 3:25 pm alt-f4

    Here’s one for troop, the words of the Chechen President (who ten years ago fought against Russia before changing sides):

    “We know how to defend a nation, and for that reason we are asking the Russian Federation leadership to use more Chechens there. (…) Yesterday I watched a fragment on television how the commander-in-chief of Georgia [Saakashvili], hearing the sound of (Russian) aircraft, ran, leaving everybody else to catch up. He should have been sent to the Olympics to participate in the running competition—he is a great sprinter”