Permanently Bewildered01 Sep 2008 11:11 pm

Incredulous Phil

By Nelson

Should we bring back “British Bulldog”?

what we going to do next ban something because it may hurt someone’s feelings.
Phil, Bristol

Sorry Phil, this is “Should we bring back British Bulldog”. You wanted “They’ve only gone and banned gollywogs!”. It’s just down the hall, past “Prison? Holiday camp more like!”.

18 Responses to “Incredulous Phil”

  1. on 01 Sep 2008 at 11:56 pm   Vicky

    I’ve been to holiday camps like that. They made me long for the halcyon days when I was still allowed to launch my 3′10″ self at a line of baying bigger kids without the PC… you get the picture.

  2. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:11 am   Tin King

    First they ban genocide, and now this! It’s a slippery slope I tell you. Thank you very much EU Human Rights Act brigade!!

  3. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:12 am   Itchy Vagina

    Only a fucking queer would want to grapple with other boys in the playground.

    British Bulldog sounds like something that happens in gay porn.

    Those fucking perverts makes me sick.

  4. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:32 am   Gagging For It

    what i’m going to do next is only use one apostrophe when i punctuate my sentence.

  5. on 02 Sep 2008 at 4:22 am   Rod Wrongnob

    *British* Bulldog? Is this one of Gobdon Clown’s schemes? NO THANKS! ENGLISH BULLDOG FOR ME!!!, in glorious monoculture.

  6. on 02 Sep 2008 at 8:30 am   Far-Q

    In answer to Phil, yes. We, the rulers of the WWW are going to ban him from spouting his brane-gunk onto the interwebs without proper forethought because it hurts my feelings.

    And makes my fists itch.

  7. on 02 Sep 2008 at 9:42 am   setyourfacestostunned

    We tried to play Asian Bulldog at school a few times but if you got anywhere near a Muslim kid he’d blow himself up.

    That’s fucking hard!

  8. on 02 Sep 2008 at 10:07 am   Rich (MMath)(Oxon)

    what we going to do next ban something because it may hurt someone’s feelings.
    Phil, Bristol

    I don’t believe it. He’s set himself up perfectly for an “oOPS…They do tHAT already!?!one!”, and then not followed through.

  9. on 02 Sep 2008 at 10:14 am   Mim

    Incredulous Phil sounds like a CBeebies programme. Maybe a sort of pre-school, fascist One Foot in the Grave.

    Incredulous Phil!
    Incredulous Phil!
    He has no friends
    And he never will!

    Etcetera. With some bloke dancing in a giant fuzzy costume that gives children nightmares.

  10. on 02 Sep 2008 at 11:52 am   Motchan

    Mim,

    “With some bloke dancing in a giant fuzzy costume that gives children nightmares.”

    Brilliant, thats cheered me up on a wet Tuesday morning.

    Not the giving children nightmares bit, alright well maybe a little bit, but they are horrible little knifecrimers.
    Anyway they all need toughening up to become well trained cannonfodder before they all take gap years or what’ll happen when WWII: The Sequel arrives? We’ll be up to our necks in goose-stepping nazi muslim suicide bombers and Bio-fuelled Messerschmitts!

    You can make it up. FACT

  11. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:39 pm   Rod Wrongnob

    Mim, for music I refer you to 101 Dalmatians, the Cruella DeVil song.

  12. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:41 pm   Mim

    Argh. I think that’s the tune I was using in my head without realising it. Such is the power of rhyme.

  13. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:45 pm   Alex

    He’s set himself up perfectly for an “oOPS…They do tHAT already!?!one!”, and then not followed through.

    Don’t worry. He followed through earlier, with blind rage at the PC scenario in his head.

  14. on 02 Sep 2008 at 12:46 pm   kukomanga

    Is this about the wrestler? Because, alas, he is dead.

  15. on 02 Sep 2008 at 1:09 pm   Dingleberry

    @kukomanga

    …eeew. Nasty. Are you sure he’s dead? Did he die of advanced Stupidnugly Syndrome?

  16. on 02 Sep 2008 at 1:12 pm   Darlek13

    “With some bloke dancing in a giant fuzzy costume that gives children nightmares”

    Yeah. Probably a fuckin’ Talibadger!

  17. on 02 Sep 2008 at 1:51 pm   Footbullet

    Thanks to wikipedia, I just found out this nugget of brilliance on wrestler Davey Boy Smith, AKA “The British Bulldog”:

    “Smith’s middle name, Boy, was the result of one of his parents mistaking the name field on Smith’s birth certificate for the gender field.”

  18. on 02 Sep 2008 at 5:27 pm   346576754 (random)

    kukomanga - Camel toe. Ouch.