spEak You're bRanes

Racists16 Sep 2008 09:23 am

Normal, normal, spelling mistake, normal normal, RACIST!

By Kelvin

How important is the Big Bang experiment?

Another major advancement in science. Like the space programme & splitting ther atom , hudge advances & spin offs will be made from this research.
If science had not ploughed on we would all still be living up coconut trees & eating peanuts like they stll are in africa.

David Perry, weybridge

All credit to spotters Rach and Matt for this one, including the headline which feels like some distorted version of the macarena.

63 Responses to “Normal, normal, spelling mistake, normal normal, RACIST!”

on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:26 am Kelvin

However what neither Rach nor Matt nor I can fathom is where they get the peanuts from, up those coconut trees.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:38 am deadestfish

Normal, normal, spelling mistake, normal normal, RACIST! – feels like some distorted version of the macarena.

I’m imagining it to the tune of ‘Pop goes the weasel’, which works rather well.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:42 am setyourfacestostunned

I’m surprised the word “loin cloth” did not appear in his post.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:43 am setyourfacestostunned

Sorry, that would be words “loin cloth”.

Relax, I learnt English in Africa.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:44 am Alex

I wonder if he’s noticed that people still eat peanuts in the West.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:48 am shoelace

Where would we be without scientists? Well, we’d still be making do with a 17th century level of hudge for a start. Hudge spin-offs are good too, especially the action figures and novelty dildoids.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:48 am DannyBoyB

I’m fairly sure that David has not seen anything of the “Dark Continent” on the television, probably since it’s invention.

I imagine him to be typing this on a steam powered typing machine at a table in a gentlemens club, wearing a smoking jacket and sporting a massive handlebar moustache and a monocle.

What a twat.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:52 am Monkey See Monkey Doodle

I’d like to think this is just a lapse midway through taking a HYS Anonymous group course to help the racism.

“My name’s David, and I’m a lemurs love purse.”

Just 6 more weeks Dave, you can do it…
on 16 Sep 2008 at 9:55 am outragedofbelmarsh

‘we would all still be living up coconut trees & eating peanuts like they stll are in africa.’
I’d like to stuff this cuntbubble into the large Hadron Collider and accelerate him so fast round the loop that his self-satisfied stupid face would have an near-lightspeed collision with his poorly-wiped arsehole. The result replicating the moment after the Big Bang by generating Higg’s Whining Racist Fucknut Particles.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:09 am Solly

Damn you, Deadestfish, you’ve got me singing that to myself now…

“Normal, normal, spelling mistake
Normal, normal, racist

Normal, normal, spelling mistake
Pop goes the Kelvin”

(or ‘Pop goes the racist’ – but maybe that’s too much to hope for)
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:14 am Tonymac

“I’d like to stuff this cuntbubble into the large Hadron Collider and accelerate him so fast round the loop that his self-satisfied stupid face would have an near-lightspeed collision with his poorly-wiped arsehole. The result replicating the moment after the Big Bang by generating Higg’s Whining Racist Fucknut Particles.”

It might form a Gache in the space-time continuum though.

Also, is he saying that this advance was critical to avoid repatriating 60 million Brits up coconut trees?
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:21 am setyourfacestostunned

Are there any black people in Weybridge?

If David thinks Africans still live up coconut trees eating peanuts he must marvel at the black people in his own town, what with them having mastered the use of rudimentary tools and all?

He probably thinks it’s all voodoo.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:24 am mildred

outragedofbelmarsh – i’m slightly concerned that you know that Dave Perry’s arsehole is poorly-wiped
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:28 am Erised

I must have missed the palm groves of Weybridge.

*has never been*

I’m surprised he didn’t choose a mighty oak, to be honest. That’s where I’d be without science.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:31 am Rhinestone Choirboy

HYS is surely proof that all these scientific advancements haven’t *entirely* eradicated ignorant backward savages from the West…
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:33 am outragedofbelmarsh

‘outragedofbelmarsh – i’m slightly concerned that you know that Dave Perry’s arsehole is poorly-wiped’

Fair enough. I was assuming that he even wipes his arse. Rather than just does it in the nappy his mother still makes him wear.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:36 am Joe

Added: Thursday, 11 September, 2008, 12:04 GMT 13:04 UK

Simon Singh – that clever science bloke – said in answer to ‘what’s the point in it (this experiment)?’ that: what is the point of a symphony or work of art? Nothing – only that what would life be without them? I can’t get my head round this stuff as I was always asleep at the back during physics class – but guess one day – it will mean much more to the world. OK, you can’t ‘look at and enjoy’ this experiment like a painting but it doesn’t mean its findings won’t enhance life at some stage.

[hairless_heart], London

A particularly fine example of the “I have no idea what any of this is about but I like typing at ill-informed strangers” post, I feel.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:37 am Rebel

Fair enough. I was assuming that he even wipes his arse. Rather than just does it in the nappy his mother still makes him wear.
—–

MAKES him wear ?

I think you’ll find this ameoba’s arsehole pays good money on a Saturday night to go to Nappy Time Club where “Mummy Suzie” breast feeds him whilst rubbing Sudocreme into botty.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:39 am Mooska

I really hope a massive global-warming-related flood hits Weybridge and causes David to retreat up a tree, leaving his Toby jugs and golfing tat submerged as he waves desperately to TV crews in helicopters and the laughter of the nation.

Although if he drowns I’ll be just as happy.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:48 am setyourfacestostunned

Aside from the blatant racism David is actually one of the more enlightened souls on HYS. Comparatively. I feel we might be being a tad harsh on him.

Actually no, he’s a racist cunt.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:49 am Rodimus Prime

I’ve never seen such levels of floundering cluelessness on HYS as the LHC seems to have inspired. Check this out:

“The big bang: if there wasn’t a big bang then how are we here – the entirety of everything inc. the sun etc? say every single thing and planet started with one giant super massive gigantic huge big extraordinary unreal shocking sized meatball of a thing called a planet mass that exploded? Others maybe then think were part of an accumulation of space debris? Then would i sooner try to finish that scrabble word i started 30 years ago? Maybe everything is just from a space seed, that grew.”

Deep, man. Or, more succinctly:

“can you hear a bang in space, i thought space was vacum?
what is darkness made of.”

There’s a guy calling himself ‘ATLAS Physicist, CERN’, trying to talk sense amidst this hurricane of stupidity. If he really does work there he must be tempted to make a cheeky black hole and put an end to the madness.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 10:50 am khmer jaune

I’m mostly looking forward to one of the spin-off series (a bit like hollyoaks “Let Loose” hopefully), showing us all what life would be like without a Large Hadron Collider – we would all still be living up coconut trees eating dry roasted peanuts like they still are in Africa still. i’ve got a plasma telly and sky plus still so i’m not backward like them people in Africa still.

David Perry is quite clearly suffering from a case of being poor. And a cunt.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 11:02 am babyHYSer

got all excited at the idea of ‘nappy time club’ so i googled it and got this: http://ex.plode.us/comments/238875/

i’ve already joined “bebo” for nothing, so won’t make the same timewasting mistake with “ex.plode”

just have to stick to do-it-yourself pampers i guess. “bank”
on 16 Sep 2008 at 11:04 am Dalek13

So is HYS a Large Hardon Collider?

Or just full of self-created black holes like Dave?

TELEM EEEE?????????

Relax, I’m dark matter
on 16 Sep 2008 at 11:51 am Bit Special

For a man of such impressive wisdom and opinion, David Perry seems bafflingly ignorant of the fact that it would be impossible to live in a coconut tree, given their structure and appearance.

Sorry, I just meant to say ‘David Perry seems bafflingly ignorant’. Worra cunt!
on 16 Sep 2008 at 11:54 am Kelvin

OK, you can’t ‘look at and enjoy’ this experiment like a painting but it doesn’t mean its findings won’t enhance life at some stage.

[hairless_heart], London

Actually, you damn well can: http://cache.gizmodo.com/assets/resources/2008/08/hadron1.jpg
on 16 Sep 2008 at 12:33 pm Far-Q

Inside David’s head as he wrote this: mustmakesanecomment,mustnotberacist, mustmakesanecomment,mustnotberacist, mustmakesanecomment,mustnotberacist, mustmakesanecomment,mustnotberacist,
ALLAFRICANSAREBACKWARDS
on 16 Sep 2008 at 12:55 pm Gamma Sock

Bring back Nelson.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 12:59 pm davesNotHere

Aren’t Hudge Advances moves in Mornington Crescent that permit the vertical cross only on Wednesdays and via an ascending traverse?
on 16 Sep 2008 at 1:57 pm Scattergun Philosopher

Why is “Vegetable Curriculum” closed ??!?1!!
Another lefty conspiracy. I want to pooooooooooooooost. ooh ooh ooh, come on.

I love the way Perry assumes that cos some VERY CLEVER people built the LHC in Europe it proves he’s smarter than all of Africa.

Maybe he should get a job at CERN… as the guy that picks up any spare particles which have fallen off the accelerator thingie. Or as the black hole tester.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 1:59 pm Scattergun Philosopher

And what’s wrong with White Holes all of a sudden, anyway? Political Correctness gone baaaaaaarmy!
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:08 pm Disgustipated

Scattergun Philosopher

And what’s wrong with White Holes all of a sudden, anyway? Political Correctness gone baaaaaaarmy!

Pfft. Everyone knows white holes spew time back into the universe.

That’s just asking for trouble.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:09 pm Disgustipated

Aargh, ballsed up the bolding there.

Bum gravy.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:19 pm Rich(MMath)

I’m seeing those bounty ads in a whole new light now. The slow-motion coconuts splitting, sending coconut juice cascading off as they strike a rock were actually thrown down by peanut-scoffing nig nogs.

Relax. I’m a smart-casual racist.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:22 pm Simple Mind

Anyone know what this particular loony is on about?!

“Why shouldnt physics TRY understand how the world started
We already know how it ends Our recognisable form that is
Allow us to carry on making EXTINCT after EXTINCT
Allow us to carry on putting more land under the sea
Allow us to destroy the worlds forestry
Allow us to carry on testing atom bombs
Allow us to fill the world with man made carbon and allow us to depreciate our oxygen
Allow us to create our own hurricanes
We will soon see how it ends IF WE ARE STILL HERE TO BEAR WITNESS!

Joan, UK ”

I think it works to “Pop goes the Weasel” too, if that’s of any help.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:28 pm Alex

Why is “Vegetable Curriculum” closed ??!?1!!
Another lefty conspiracy. I want to pooooooooooooooost. ooh ooh ooh, come on.

Let me answer this. Nelson fixed it as an experiment to see how long SYBers could last without splurging their opinions about every single fucking topic they see all over the empty white internet-boxes.

Also because WordPress arbitrarily decided comments would be closed, I didn’t notice it in time to re-optionate it and now the post’s up only Nelson has the keys to open it.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:35 pm Simon

i think you’re all being unfair. i was in africa a couple of summers ago and i did see some people eat peanuts. amazing isn’t it? in this day and age!
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:46 pm Kelvin

But I just saw a black man buy some peanuts in the newsagent. WHY BOTHER COMING HERE WHEN YOU CAN GET YOUR OWN PEANUTS AT HOME!!!
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:48 pm Immigrant Job Stealing Paedo

“We will soon see how it ends IF WE ARE STILL HERE TO BEAR WITNESS!”

I don’t think we’ll be hearing from Joan again as she seems have expoded under the pure rage at how stupid Physics is. Which is a shame, because I want to here her thoughts on Maths causing the economic meltdown and Biology causing bird flu.

On second thoughts, I don’t want to here anything from this angry, pig-shit ignorant cuntfuck other than a death-rattle.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:49 pm i would prefer not to

deadestfish, the pop goes the weasel tune fits perfectly, I’ve been humming it to myself for the last ten minutes. Curse you.

Rhinestone choirboy, I think HYS should be used as a means of curing anyone who is overly optimistic about human nature. People complain about politicians, but frankly if I had to govern these arsewipes, I’d treat them with contempt too.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:49 pm Immigrant Job Stealing Paedo

Not ‘here’, I meant ‘hear’.

Ballsocks.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 2:57 pm AndyS

putting land under the sea, if you ignore archimedian principle, is clearly a bad thing as it will make the sea shallower and then the darkies could walk from africa to england to get their hands on nobby’s nuts.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 3:10 pm Nobby

They had better keep their hands off my nuts.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 3:14 pm Mal

Before scientists came along the sea used to go all the way down and up the other side. Now it barely goes six centimetres even in its deepest spots.

Won’t someone please think of the children?
on 16 Sep 2008 at 3:20 pm Col John Matrix

“Allow us to fill the world with man made carbon and allow us to depreciate our oxygen”

Our oxygen is depreciating? Is this what is causing the ‘credit crunch’ and the stock market chaos…has billions of dollars of value been written off the value of our depreciating oxygen reserves?
on 16 Sep 2008 at 3:21 pm mildred

First Alex pretends it’s more to do with WordPress technical problems than social engineering like what the HYS moderators do.

Then Immigrant Job Stealing Paedo confuses ‘here’ with ‘hear’.

The line between HYS & SYB just gets thinner and thinner…
on 16 Sep 2008 at 3:39 pm Immigrant Job Stealing Paedo

It’s not my fault I can’t spell, with all that time being made to learn about brown peoples history in school there’s no time for real ENGLISH words any more.

LEARN!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111ONEHUNDREDANDELEVEN!!!1111
on 16 Sep 2008 at 5:48 pm Joe C

David Perry has been out of Weybridge only once in his life.

He once went to Shepperton, but there were too many darkies for his liking.

David Perry is 67 and has eight dogs. The local children fear him.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 5:50 pm Randy Hank Spangler III

@Alex “I didn’t notice it in time to re-optionate it.”

What a truly beautified word ‘re-optionate’ is. So pleasurefying.

I will internalise it brain-wise and eventise it in my future-diarised speakings to re-facilitate its plusness and sociality.

Relax… I’m an American
on 16 Sep 2008 at 7:49 pm Gilbert Wham

“Why is “Vegetable Curriculum” closed ??!?1!!
Another lefty conspiracy.”
This also fits to the tune of ‘Pop goes the Weasel’. Fuck. EVERYTHING does.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 8:51 pm Hootie McBoob

I used to live in Weybridge and can confirm it is fulling of twittering fuckcunts just like David.
on 16 Sep 2008 at 11:13 pm Alex

I think you might have got some real words in there by mistake Randy.
on 17 Sep 2008 at 9:53 am no-brane vegetable

so is that it then? is SYB closed down? has everyone gone somewhere else? am i talking to myself?
on 17 Sep 2008 at 10:04 am Rebel

Who said that ???
on 17 Sep 2008 at 10:09 am Throbbe

Anyone else who is sick of muttering along to the tune of ‘Pop Goes The Weasel’ may be interested to know that the theme tune to the The Archers works almost as well, and gives things a more cheery tone.
on 17 Sep 2008 at 10:59 am Captain Yogurt

I now have a hideous “Pop Goes the Weasel”/Archers’ theme tune hybrid in my head
OH GOD MAKE IT STOP
on 17 Sep 2008 at 11:44 am AndyS

is this SYB goes ISIHAC?

graeme garden, today i’d like you to sing the turgid nonsense spewing forth from joy pattinson’s keyboard to the tune of ‘oh what a night’
on 17 Sep 2008 at 11:48 am Kelvin

Samantha’s recently taken on a part-time job in a benefits office, but unfortunately her boss is on the take. So while she beats off hordes of immigrants he just sits there and fiddles.
on 17 Sep 2008 at 11:56 am veggie

to the tune of?
on 17 Sep 2008 at 12:08 pm Sexcrime Rhino

Benny Hill theme tune I reckon.
on 17 Sep 2008 at 12:58 pm bigruss

depressingly, like so many other examples of HYS posts, the only reply or comment that can possibly encapsulate the sheer ignorance and stupidity is……. CUNT.
on 17 Sep 2008 at 1:00 pm mildred

thanks rhino, that’s taken care of the hideous “Pop Goes the Weasel”/Archers’ theme tune hybrid that had taken over my brane
on 17 Sep 2008 at 9:06 pm Owen

Why do we need to understand dark matter anyway? They should learn about OUR culture. What about Nelson, Falklands and Trafalgar??!

"If you love North Korea so much..
why don't you go live there?"

63 Responses to “Normal, normal, spelling mistake, normal normal, RACIST!”

About

Search

Contributors

Tags

Archives

Pages

spEak You're bRanes

"If you love North Korea so much.. why don't you go live there?"

63 Responses to “Normal, normal, spelling mistake, normal normal, RACIST!”

About

Search

Contributors

Tags

Archives

Pages

"If you love North Korea so much..
why don't you go live there?"