Unfocused Rage14 Oct 2008 02:19 pm
By Nelson

Thanks to Rich. “Should ‘happy hours’ be banned?”. Apparently someone else posted in this thread with the nick “some people are gay,get over it“.

Update: Ah, he’s probably referring to this Stonewall poster.

what?no dont ban anything,and this poster “some people are gay,get over it” is the worst stupid idea ever,i would kick in a load of gays just because of that poster.get over it?why pick the worst gay character traits to emulate….er….girlfriend.
get over it,get over it?idiots.its even the wrong kind of language to even think would work.first thing is what if i dont,whats going to happen then,get over it,your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?,nothing eh so i wont
rob, swansea

Rob’s having yet another epic battle with his conscience. Last night he went out to “The Kings Arms” again, before guiltily ejaculating onto a chap who works in accounts payable. “Ejaculating is manly right? Girls can’t do it, it must be. It’s fine and manly to ejaculate. It doesn’t make you gay does it? Dave shouldn’t have got in the way. I’m going to have to kill him. Fucking gaylord. I might jiz in his hair a bit first. It smells so good just after he’s washed it”.

117 Responses to “Rob’s Struggle”

  1. on 14 Oct 2008 at 2:54 pm Liz (MA)(Calcutta)(Failed)

    I think he’s talking about Stonewall’s anti-bullying poster: http://www.stonewall.org.uk/education_for_all/news/current_news/2043.asp

    Unfortunately Rob illustrates beautifully that it doesn’t work on its target audience ie gurning cunts like him.

  2. on 14 Oct 2008 at 2:59 pm AndyBir

    I genuinely do not understand what his point is. Is the fact that there are gay people use the internet? I mean, I too was shocked when I found out that they do not just go around all day wearing vests, listening to showtunes and engaging in furious bouts of bumsex, but I did not feel the need to textualise my surprise. And I assume that when he says “Kick in” a load of gays, he means cover himself in baby oil and beg a load of gays(or as they are known in some circles, people) for some cock action. I wonder if he has trouble sleeping at night without damaging the full size cardboard cutout of graham norton that he sleeps with.

  3. on 14 Oct 2008 at 2:59 pm AndyS

    that stonewall press release seems to be saying that John Barrowman is insisting that school children become gays

    relax, i’m on bbc1

  4. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:03 pm Slothrop

    I love the “its even the wrong kind of language to even think would work” bit in a post which appears to have been written by somebody with the literacy of a sub-normal 7 years old.

    Also, if he “don’t [get over it]” and does go and “kick in a load of gays” then what’s going to happen is that he’s going to be prosecuted and sent to prison (political correctness gone mad of course, but for some reason it remains illegal to “kick in” gays – although you’ll only get 7 years if you kill them, compared to 30 for thinking about blowing up a politician).

  5. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:06 pm popug

    Is the er…girlfriend bit supposed to be said in the style of a diva, because that’s what them gays say (along with ‘get over it’…obviously). I’m mightily confused but also amazed that people are willing to announce to the world that a poster advocating acceptance would made them “kick in a load of gays”.

    I hope he doesn’t get set on fire, or get poisoned. That would be awful.

  6. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:07 pm AndyS

    to be fair, when he said ‘kick in a load of gays’ he probably meant ‘kick the back doors in on a lot of gays’, he was just in too much of a state of excitement & it came out all wrong

  7. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:10 pm Dingleberry Bush

    the worst stupid idea ever

    What’s the best stupid idea ever?

  8. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:13 pm Alex

    first thing is what if i dont,whats going to happen then,get over it,your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?,nothing eh so i wont

    For a start, the thought that someone somewhere is getting his cock sucked by another man will enter your head. Then the thought that somewhere else, two other men are doing anal sodomy together, and then worse still, that two are probably KISSING. You will become enraged and obsessed by these thoughts, which will ultimately make you unhappy and frustrated.

  9. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:15 pm Dingleberry Bush

    best stupid idea ever… well it has to be blockquotes, doesn’t it?

  10. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:22 pm Rich (MMath)(Oxon)

    I don’t think this can be classed as “unfocused rage”- he’s focused his rage quite nicely on the gays.

  11. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:29 pm Peedo stalker Sam

    I notice that he started his post with an impressive old man style

    What?

    , as if he’s just been woken up from dreaming about rimming John Humphries.

  12. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:31 pm AndyS

    two other men are doing anal sodomy together

    is that as opposed to the other forms of sodomy alex?

  13. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:32 pm Felna

    I’m not os sure Rich, he strikes me as the kind of guy that psychologists would define as having ‘issues’ – the whole gay thing just happened to be in his way today.

    Personally I’d define him as a ‘Gibbon Minge’.

  14. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:36 pm Alex

    I don’t think this can be classed as “unfocused rage”- he’s focused his rage quite nicely on the gays.

    I disagree. He is immensely angry at someone whose username tells him to get used to people being gay and this rage has sort of sprayed out in all directions, splattering gays, effeminate men and the PC brigade alike.

  15. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:39 pm Dingleberry

    first thing is what if i dont,whats going to happen then,get over it,your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?,nothing eh so i wont
    rob, swansea

    I’ve heard of people talking to themselves, but that’s the first time I seen anyone get into an argument with themsleves in writing.

    Hmmm… Stream of Consciousnesses – I think Rob might have hit on the next big literary style.

  16. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:46 pm dirigible

    “Ejaculating is manly right? Girls can’t do it”

    He’s not trying hard enough, obviously.

  17. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:54 pm Rod Wrongnob

    Skimming through the blather, it seems that teh gayz were first introduced to the thread by long-time friend of SYB Joy P.

    Free drinks for women? So where does that leave cross-dressers?

    Of course Joy, that’s they only reason they do it!

    (“patrick mason-green” is quite something as well. 1,292 posts of really bizarre punctuation.)

  18. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:58 pm jimbob

    Out on the balcony, when Reginald kissed Diana’s lips, her knees went weak. Slowly, he pulled her top down, exposing her soft, unyielding breasts.

    Oh yeah, now this is getting good

    Just the sight of those breasts made Reginald’s penis very hard.

    His penis was of considerable size, and now beads of sweat slowly ran down his
    penis, making it glisten like a strong swimmer fresh from out of the pool. It was a fantastic penis, that seemed as strong as a horse’s leg, yet as delicate as a flower wrapped in silk. What a grand, grand penis.

  19. on 14 Oct 2008 at 3:58 pm Bit Special

    Sigh… does it really have to be me who makes a joke about him being Welsh and therefore he’s clearly enraged that gays get equal (ish) rights in law, whilst he’s still vilified for shagging sheep? Although to claim that he would even be capable of that would be an insult to inbred bestialists ‘n’ zoophiles.

    I was looking at some of my old schoolbooks the other day, whilst decluttering; I had better reasoning, spelling, punctuation and grammar than Rob does now, when I was 6. I don’t care what people say about not getting hung up on this stuff – pedantry is an important part of the personality development of twat-mockers like ourselves not just nationally but worldwide…

  20. on 14 Oct 2008 at 4:01 pm Kelvin

    You people are always focusing on the negatives.

    get over it?why pick the worst gay character traits to emulate….er….girlfriend.

    Ten years ago he’d have said the worst gay character traits were fucking children and raping hard working British white males in the bottom.

    THAT’S PROGRESS!

  21. on 14 Oct 2008 at 4:01 pm Jimmy Bignutz

    You know people say “I bet this doesn’t get posted”… well, doesn’t stuff like this suggest that there isn’t any moderation at all?

  22. on 14 Oct 2008 at 4:08 pm Rich (MMath)

    The first round of moderation just gets rid of posts with “gollywog” in. That and random posts by people who look like they might get really pissy about their posts being removed.

    Anything that actually offends people will probably stay there until some do-gooder complains.

  23. on 14 Oct 2008 at 4:14 pm Kelvin

    Also, Nelson, is this post called “Rob’s Struggle” just to elicit a “Rob’s Kampf” joke from someone? Because I won’t rise to it, do you hear?

  24. on 14 Oct 2008 at 4:18 pm Simon

    Methinks the lady doth protest too much. It’s odds on that he’s so far in the closet that he lives in fucking Narnia.

    I mean – just look at his witterings, he’s clearly a confused little boy.

    i would kick in a load of gays just because of that poster

    Implies that BDSM is his cup of tea, then

    first thing is what if i dont,whats going to happen then,get over it,your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?

    implies that it isn’t. He really needs to make his mind up poor lamb. Even just admitting bi-curiosity would be progress.

    Did “a Gay” once steal his sweeties or eat his homework or something? What a dripping marmot’s mimsy.

  25. on 14 Oct 2008 at 4:29 pm Oliver

    Any of you lot been to Swansea?

    No? Thought not.

    Relax, i’m from Cardiff.

  26. on 14 Oct 2008 at 5:05 pm Dingleberry Bush

    “some people are gay,get over it”

    i would kick in a load of gays just because of that poster.

    You can picture him, bulldog-swaggering past the poster, deliberately looking down at the pavement, but his eyes keep flicking to those big bold words and he has to force them back to the pavement. Everyday he faces the battle of Walking Past The Poster. Followed by the torment of the whispering inner voices…. psst… some people are gay, Rob, get over it… MENTAL DOORSLAM hey Rob, do you remember having that play fight in the showers with Dylan Willams after rugby in the six form?… MENTAL DOORSLAM you sometimes look at men’s arses, Rob MENTAL DOORSLAM, yes you do. Gay, bi or just curious, Rob? SHAKES HEAD, GROWLS, SMACKS FIST AGAINST FOREHEAD…

    goes and kicks in a load of gays

  27. on 14 Oct 2008 at 5:07 pm Dingleberry Bush

    grooooan… some people are retarded, get over it!

  28. on 14 Oct 2008 at 5:12 pm Grace Fletcher-Hackwood

    I think the rhythms of this comment flow much more naturally if you imagine it being said in a Welsh accent.

    Possibly with hiccups.

  29. on 14 Oct 2008 at 5:34 pm fucko the clown

    always with the sexism here! what about the lesbians? lets give them a mention. Nubile young ladies (not paedo young though!) covered in baby oil banging slots together….

    oooohh i’m going off….

  30. on 14 Oct 2008 at 6:07 pm SJG

    I hated that Stonewall ad from the start because its aggressiveness was bound to elicit this stupid reaction from the people it was targeting. Now I hate Rob for having that stupid reaction. And I hate myself for being a bit poofy.

  31. on 14 Oct 2008 at 6:30 pm Peedo Stalker Sam

    I hated the advert because it’s fucking bollocks. “Some people are gay. Get over it! Or we’ll come round to your house and rape you!” would probably be more effective. You need to scare the populace, not use some limp-wristed rectally-prolapsed “sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me”-style schoolground retort.

  32. on 14 Oct 2008 at 6:43 pm Peedo Stalker Sam

    …and another thing. Do Stonewall really think that the appropriate thing to try to combat people’s deeply-held homophobia is a series of billboards saying “…erm…everything you think about the gays is wrong, so, er, if you could, like, change your mind, erm, that’d be just swell…yeah.”?

    I might start an advertising campaign saying “Some people are gay. But that doesn’t mean they can’t be a bunch of ineffective bellends!”

  33. on 14 Oct 2008 at 6:46 pm Peedo Stalker Sam

    To try to balance out what I just said, I’d like to also state that even if, in this instance, Stonewall have been a bunch of ineffective bellends, at least they’re not permanently afflicted with having platypus shit for brain matter, like Rob from Swansea. Sorry: rob, swansea.

  34. on 14 Oct 2008 at 7:08 pm SJG

    Well, it’s based on non-existant/shit reasoning, which is why it should be scorned. Some people are pediatricians, should I get over that too?! They’re not shedding light on homosexuality or breaking down any barriers and showing there’s nothing wrong with it, by classing it as something to be tolerated they’re probably making it all worse.

    Which leads me to my point: rob, swansea sounds hot.

  35. on 14 Oct 2008 at 7:34 pm alt-f4

    …get over it…get over it…get over it,get over it…get over it rob, swansea

    Get over it? Get yer leg over it Rob. C’mon, from behind guy’s asses are just the same as girl’s. OK, they’re hairier, fatter, harder, and a different shape. But there’s still a hole in the middle.
    Need’s must. If Topsy can do it, so can you.

    Look at it this way – if a gay bloke comes on to you, the feelings you experience are NO FUCKING DIFFERENT to what every fit bird in history has had to put up with from the moment she sprouted breats: Unwelcome advances from men she didn’t fancy. She learned to deal with it. She had to. So why can’t you? Get over it, and it might make you a better person. You might even learn to respect women a bit more, you cunt.

    Meanwhile, here’s some other hard facts for you to get over:

    - Some successful, hard working, people take drugs for recreation. Get over it.

    - Some healthy Octogenarians are atheists. Get over it.

    - Some brown people are more intelligent than you. Get over it.

    - Some immigrants contribute more to their adopted communities that you ever will. Get over it.

    - Some socialists work hard for their money, don’t get into debt, and do not have to rely on credit cards or state handouts to take care of themselves and their kith and kin during the hard times. Get over it.

    - Some pacifists will cheerfully rip out your throat with a Bowie knife if you ever threaten thier home or their family. Get over it.

    - Some terrorists do have a point. Get over that.

  36. on 14 Oct 2008 at 7:51 pm Alex

    Perhaps a better poster would be “Some men like other men, and they do to each other that you(‘d like to) do to girls. That’s about as interesting as it gets really.”

    - Some brown people are more intelligent than you. Get over it.
    - Some immigrants contribute more to their adopted communities that you ever will. Get over it.

    Only “some”?

  37. on 14 Oct 2008 at 8:50 pm Far-Q

    get over it,get over it?idiots.its even the wrong kind of language to even think would work.first thing is what if i dont,whats going to happen then,get over it,your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?,nothing eh so i wont

    Much as I want to follow rob’s wise advice and not pick out the worst traits in anyone:
    Never mind the punctuation marks, at least learn to use the SPACE BAR! IT’S THE LONG THIN THING ON THE BOTTOM OF THE KEYBOARD YOU BELL-END-BRAINED FUCK-KNUCKLE.

    *ahem* Sorry about that.

    No, Rob, that short thin thing on the bottom of the keyboard is your cock. You had it out to wank over beating up/off gay men in your repressed homosexual way.

    You clearly also do your thinking with it.

  38. on 14 Oct 2008 at 9:45 pm Far-Q

    your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?,nothing eh so i wont

    PS: Ooh get her.

  39. on 14 Oct 2008 at 10:25 pm Bob Hairy

    “Six hundred billboard panels will depict this legend in giant, tabloid-style capital letters, on a bright red background at sights in England, Scotland and Wales.”

    Is it me or shouldn’t that be “sites”, or do I need “educating” too?

  40. on 14 Oct 2008 at 11:25 pm Joe C

    Rob, from Swansea, doesn’t know how to fry an egg, so his grandma has to make his breakfast every morning before he heads off to the cannery. Rob is 37 and single.

  41. on 14 Oct 2008 at 11:36 pm burnel

    Rob from Swansea has the vocabulary, punctuation and grammatical skills of a delinquent 6 year old Nazi. So what if I’m not going to get over it. Who’s going to order me? So I wont.

  42. on 14 Oct 2008 at 11:38 pm burnel

    “Rob is 37 and single.”

    Singularly gay.

  43. on 14 Oct 2008 at 11:44 pm Vicky

    Right, I’m back from a long period of SYB cold-turkey, what have I missed?

    as if he’s just been woken up from dreaming about rimming John Humphries.

    As a peedo stalker, shouldn’t you be dreaming about someone a bit younger?

    I do love the way that Rob sweeps away the actual topic with a brief “no don’t ban anything” (not often we hear that kind of liberal statement), before moving on to the thing he spends all day thinking about. I bet his colleagues learned very quickly to not, under any circumstances, ask how he is.

  44. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:11 am millie

    what have I missed?

    Hi Vicky. After much discussion it has been established that THIS IS A FUNNY WEBSITE. (Glad we got that straight.)

  45. on 15 Oct 2008 at 8:53 am Liberal Left and Proud

    on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:11 am millie

    what have I missed?
    Hi Vicky. After much discussion it has been established that THIS IS A FUNNY WEBSITE. (Glad we got that straight.)

    ………….

    Glad we got that straight? You’re as bad as Rob from Swansea you queerbasher.

  46. on 15 Oct 2008 at 8:57 am Alex

    And what’s wrong with being a queerbasher? God, just thinking about how some people are offended by my regular bashing gays makes me want to go out and bash gays. You must really hate gays to want to make me hate gays this much. Suggesting that I don’t randomly assault poofs in the street makes you a homophobe and a hypocrite. End of fact!

  47. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:08 am Dingleberry

    - – Some successful, hard working, people take drugs for recreation. Get over it.

    - Some healthy Octogenarians are atheists. Get over it.

    - Some brown people are more intelligent than you. Get over it.

    - Some immigrants contribute more to their adopted communities that you ever will. Get over it.

    - Some socialists work hard for their money, don’t get into debt, and do not have to rely on credit cards or state handouts to take care of themselves and their kith and kin during the hard times. Get over it.

    - Some pacifists will cheerfully rip out your throat with a Bowie knife if you ever threaten thier home or their family. Get over it.

    - Some terrorists do have a point. Get over that.

    Look! The Politically Correct 110m High-Hurdles! Where’s Black Lesbian in a Wheelchair when you need her, she’d get over this lot without even breaking in to a sweat.

    (fuck! why have i just singled out a disabled person of colour and made a joke about their handicap!? fuck fuck fuck oh god, now i look like rob,swansea… )

    Sorry, look, I wasn’t implying that black lesbians in wheelchairs are inferior in any way! Hey, you know me, I’m not prejudiced! I didn’t mean it to sound like she couldn’t, you know, succeed in normal competitions and that…. Oh fuck! I don’t mean, you know ‘normal’ like ‘she’s not normal’. Of course wheelchair sports are normal. She’s probably more normal than me, ha, ha. But… ummm… as an intelligent, independent person with alternative physical priorities she is more likely to get over mental barriers than physical ones? … Am I allowed to say that?

  48. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:19 am bigruss

    i hate gays because they are different than me.

    relax – i’m normal.

  49. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:24 am Liberal Left and Proud

    on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:08 am Dingleberry

    Sorry, look, I wasn’t implying that black lesbians in wheelchairs are inferior in any way! Hey, you know me, I’m not prejudiced! I didn’t mean it to sound like she couldn’t, you know, succeed in normal competitions and that…. Oh fuck! I don’t mean, you know ‘normal’ like ’she’s not normal’. Of course wheelchair sports are normal. She’s probably more normal than me, ha, ha. But… ummm… as an intelligent, independent person with alternative physical priorities she is more likely to get over mental barriers than physical ones? … Am I allowed to say that?

    …………

    Not in Nuliebore’s politically correct nightmare you’re not. The only people you can mock today are hardworking taxpaying indigenous white males. Unless they’re gay. Then you can’t.

  50. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:36 am Mr Cat

    i would kick in a load of gays just because of that poster

    reminds me of something from the classic John “England Not Britain, Virgin Islands (UK)” Adair which I submitted ages ago where he equates worming tablets with beating people (immigrunts) up and tries to make it sound all poetic.

    “…and the BNP being the fasted growing political party in Europe.
    john Adair, England Not Britain, Virgin Islands (UK)

    Any party that excludes some of its country’s citizens is not one I want to be associated with.
    Cyber Cohen

    Have a look around the sink estates like Peckham or Moss side or Orchard Park in Hull and the preach “social Inclusion” to me.
    We have just been through the good times and these people saw precious little of it, now we are entering the bad times lord help them.
    Theres plenty of social exclusion in this country at the moment.

    The party that cannot be mentioned will change all that, those that contribute to society will prosper, those that act as parasites will go the same way as the worms after a dose of “Bob Martins” with the help of “Doc Martins”.

    john Adair, England Not Britain, Virgin Islands (UK)”

    I don’t know where to begin here. The underlying argument is stupid, rascist and reactionary. The analogy is worse than tenuous, it’s mindlessly obscure. the attempt to sound remotely worthy or repsectable (and he wasn’t even close) is undermined by recommending that the solution is DM wearing Neo-Nazi’s beating people for being different.

    But BEST OF ALL he sees NO irony in supporting the BNP from the Virgin Islands.

    Three words for John Adair: Rascist Kettle.

  51. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:52 am Far-Q

    It must be getting hotter these days, why yesterday I went to Bradford and it was that warm, half the people I met were dressed like arabs.
    john Adair, Hull, United Kingdom

    I bet all of them though you were a cunt though John.

  52. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:58 am Dingleberry

    those that contribute to society will prosper, those that act as parasites will go the same way as the worms after a dose of “Bob Martins” with the help of “Doc Martins”.
    John Adair

    I bet you a tenner he picked this charming little analogy up from a BNP meeting, liked it and is now trying to pass it off as his own.

    It is terrifying, isn’t it? The blind self-righteousness…

    Anyone we don’t like will get the teeth kicked out of their face by organised gangs of thugs… because we are decent members of society.

    Still… Jorg Haider, eh? screeeeeeeech BANG! Oh, what a shame! :-) :-) Europe’s most promising Neo-Nazi leader is crushed to death in his Volk’s Wagen There’s a nice symmetry about that.

  53. on 15 Oct 2008 at 11:14 am Far-Q

    Speed limits are for ze untermenschen. Out of my vay oaf!



    Bugger

    Rearrange the following into an deeply uncaring sentence:

    Nicer a bloke to happen couldn’t

  54. on 15 Oct 2008 at 11:26 am Steve

    Is it just me, or do Stonewall always seem like “The Gay Union”. Lots of pride and belief in what they do, but ultimatly they are just fighting a war that is almost over, but fighting like it has just started. Also, is there any way that we can get rob and TT in the same room. Tell rob TT is Gay, and tell TT rob is not in the Army and watch them fight.

  55. on 15 Oct 2008 at 11:36 am Liberal Left and Proud

    Current top recommended post on the Booker Prize HYS (the winner wasn’t white)

    Someone recommended this book to me, and I was unfortunate enough to follow their advice.

    I nearly spewed whilst choking on the politically-correct guff that this book churns out.

    Working White Heterosexual Male, is that an offence?

    ……………………..

    I think he actually nearly spewed because of the intense effort required to understand the 3 words he managed to read on the first page. Great username though, he has truly understood that white working straight blokes are downtrodden by wimmin, poofs and immigrunts. You couldnt make it up.

  56. on 15 Oct 2008 at 11:52 am Black Lesbian In A WheelChair

    Dingleberry… I’m watching you. Cunt.

  57. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:01 pm Working White Heterosexual Male

    Should be called the Wimmins Booker Prize. When did a real MAN last win, eh? eh?

    I nominated Wayne Rooney’s Autobiography, but of course all the dykes on the panel ignored me.

  58. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:02 pm Bit Special

    So John Adair wants to sort out society’s ills with a fictional ITV character (Doc Martin)? I’m not sure that either the actor Martin Clunes or the popular grumpy physician character he plays would be very good at that.

    I would’ve thought that a pig-ignorant, thick racist like Adair would prefer to live out his pathetic skinhead fantasies in some Doc Marten boots, not a shit Cornwall-based show, but I guess he’s not as hardcore a pseudo neo-nazi as he likes to think he is…

  59. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:03 pm Bit Special

    Damn, I meant Dr Marten, not Doc! Just the mention of Adair’s name (and ITV) has dropped my IQ by about 60 points.

  60. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:33 pm Pedro

    Huzzah!

    Didn’t realise that fucknugget Haider was dead.

    Really sets up the rest of the day…

  61. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:40 pm AndyS

    hoo fucking hell – have we all seen the HYS Map?

    fire up the car boys (and disabled lesbains), we’ve got directions to these fucktards’ houses

  62. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:45 pm Call of Davrodu

    [q] your obviously ordering me so what if i dont?,nothing eh so i wont [/q]

    Rob is just waiting to be asked nicely to like gays. He’s not the kind of girl who likes being barked at. Maybe if the gays sent him some flowers, or invited him out for a nice meal, i mean its not to much to ask to feel special once in a while…

  63. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:46 pm Call of Davrodu

    aaargh, quote failure horror!

  64. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:53 pm wayne

    You think Haider was bad? He was a pussycat compared to HC Strache, the Nick-Griffin-alike who is head of the FPÖ, the party that Jörg Haider left because it was too right wing. This little shitstain has just got nearly 20% in the elections here. The worry is that with Haider gone, a lot of his personal vote will now go to the FPÖ, meaning they will do even better in the next election, due in about 6 months when the inevitable centrist coalition collapses.

    *hitches up lederhosen, goes back to schnitzel and apfelstreudel*

  65. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:53 pm Alfred Nobel

    And this year’s Nobel Peace Prize goes to…

    Wilhelm Waldburg, A seventeen year old trainee Euro-Kwikfit-Fitter in Klagenfurt, Austria for the incorrect installation of sub-standard brake pads on Herr Haider’s VW Pheaton.

  66. on 15 Oct 2008 at 12:57 pm wayne

    Oh, incidentally, part of the reason the hard right got such a large vote is that the fuckwit Austrians decided to drop the voting age to 16. Austrian yoof are no different from anywhere else, and jumped at the chance when Strache promised them that they would be allowed to binge-drink and knifecrime Turks.

  67. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:00 pm AndyS

    sensible policies in any country surely

  68. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:08 pm Dingleberry

    “Some people are simple-minded, aggressive racists with a desire to belong to pseudo-militaristic organisations dedicated to the eradication of people they regard as inferior… get over it.”

    Relax… I’m a threat to liberal democracy.

  69. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:15 pm millie

    Alf Nobble just made me LOL

  70. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:22 pm Liberal Left and Proud

    Still… Jorg Haider, eh? screeeeeeeech BANG! Oh, what a shame! Europe’s most promising Neo-Nazi leader is crushed to death in his Volk’s Wagen There’s a nice symmetry about that.

    …………….

    I fail to see the hilarity in this tragic accident. Remember what John Donne said “Any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankind”.

    Hold on, I’ve just been told there’s a little known addendum to that quote “unless he’s a nazi cunt”

  71. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:26 pm Blind Pew

    Now… the chances of this working are about 1 in 50, so please, if this is a splurge of text-mess, just look away and go about your normal business. There’s nothing to see here.

    OTOH, If this is a pretty link, then :-o , I mean WTF… 4 of these top 5 HYS posts are rational!!!

  72. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:30 pm Blind Pew

    ??? Hmmmmmmmmmmm ???

    no mess… but no link.

    Sigh, back to the drawing board.

    Anyway the link was supposed to be to the thread about the booker prize on HYS. Top Post is…

    Amazing. HYS has a thread about a work of literature, and the only comments it publishes are the ones written by people who can probably be best classified as borderline literate. A literary forum is meant for discussions on style, language, structure, and the multiplicity of meanings generated by the literary work in question. Instead we see here, the usual rants against political correctness by the great unwashed.

    Prashant, New York

    One can only assume that the hardcore knuckle-draggers are put off by the threads ‘arty bollocks’ quotient.

  73. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:33 pm Dirty Minded Nun

    *hitches up lederhosen, goes back to schnitzel and apfelstreudel*
    Wayne

    Phwoar!

  74. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:41 pm Steve

    One can only assume that the hardcore knuckle-draggers are put off by the threads ‘arty bollocks’ quotient.

    I think it has more to do with the phrase “Man Booker”. They think its a Gay litriture prize.

  75. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:41 pm Ire

    The most beautiful, heart-warming thing about Haider’s demise is that he was doing nearly 90 mph in a 40 mph speed limit zone. You could make it up, but I didn’t, I read it on the news.

  76. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:45 pm Steve

    I just had a look at the Stonewall poster. It’s shit. It just make me think “what a shit advert. You should have talked to Satchi, not a bunch of school kids”

  77. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:55 pm Far-Q

    You should have talked to Satchi

    Saatchi’s Gay!?! Nigella’s gonna be pissed off about that.

  78. on 15 Oct 2008 at 1:57 pm Coalin 'Hiphop' Powell

    is it still necessary to say that you are an African American or that you are black, and I say,yes, so that we can remind our children.

    Cos whatever happens, we must ALWAYS think of the CHILDREN!! And in case they hadn’t noticed I is black, I must keep reminding them.

  79. on 15 Oct 2008 at 2:36 pm Liberal Left and Proud

    Peter Mandelson may not be everyone’s favourite politician but he has really got the sexually confused scum of HYS in a tizzy. These gems were deleted from the Cabinet Reshuffle thread.

    Written by Sotto Voce, Cambridge

    David Miliband will need to watch his back.

    Written by Richard Hughes, Munich, West Germany

    Gordon Brown will be well and truly buggered now!

    And the classic Mandelson put down:

    Written by michael wilson, bidache, France

    I wouldn’t have anything to do with this disgusting queer.

    ………………

    Personally I think they must all be gagging for some hot boy on boy action. I suggest a foursome with Rob from Swansea.

  80. on 15 Oct 2008 at 2:48 pm Dinglederry

    why pick the worst gay character traits to emulate….er….girlfriend.
    Rob,swansea

    I’ve got two problems with this section of Rob’s thesis.
    1) I don’t understand it.
    2) While the rest of his post is semi-literate headbanging comensurate with a low-IQ homophobe, in this particular section he suddenly goes all ‘puffy’ and ‘wordy’. viz: “character traits to emulate.

    I’m not sure that queer-bashers complain about people who ‘emulate traits’. ‘copying gay people’ I’d have believed, but I think this post may be a wind up.

    (PS Man Booker is a male escort agency, not an award.)

  81. on 15 Oct 2008 at 3:19 pm Mr Cat

    Written by michael wilson, bidache, France

    I wouldn’t have anything to do with this disgusting queer.

    Made me laugh out loud. A man who doesn’t “mince” his words

  82. on 15 Oct 2008 at 3:21 pm Far-Q

    White Tiger winning the booker:

    A nothing prize from a nothing ceremony.

    I’ve read parts of it, and it’s rubbish.

    Rick Serious

    Translation:
    Got someone to help me read the cover and thought it was about white supremacy. Started reading in the middle couldn’t follow what was going on. Too many words on the page a writing too small, was all set in forrunland, with forruns talking. No pictures nor nuffin.

    Translation Translated:
    I have a small mind and an even smaller cock.

  83. on 15 Oct 2008 at 3:48 pm Far-Q

    One of the ingredients of a good joke is the unconscious irony in a supposedly serious comment.
    Dan London

    sadly Dan that’s not a joke that’s you laughing AT someone for perceived absurdity, not WITH them for witty repartee . It says a lot about you really.
    simon crane

    Not a much as the irony in Simon’s witless response says about him.

    Yes, we’re laughing at you.

  84. on 15 Oct 2008 at 3:54 pm Dingleberry

    The problem with “Award Books” is the same as with art. Some prat hangs a dead cow on the wall and calls it art (it isn’t art and never, never will be art – it’s a dead cow hung on a wall). But the arty crowd hail it as a masterpiece (really just jealous they hadn’t thought of it first) and the “artist” makes a fortune.

    With books a group of non-entities claim a totally unreadable scribble as a masterpiece and the “author” makes a few quid from an award.

    The public just laugh!

    Chris Brett, New Romney

    Books? Art? It’s all bollocks. All of it. Just jealous prats and people cashing in on dead cows and scribble.

    The public just laugh. Or should that be scoff? Who cares, it’s all bollocks.

  85. on 15 Oct 2008 at 3:55 pm millie

    I suggest a foursome with Rob from Swansea.

    I reckon you stand a better chance of your wish coming true if you post that on HYS rather than here.

  86. on 15 Oct 2008 at 3:56 pm Far-Q

    From are you feeling the pinch?

    3 Words TAX, TAX, AND TAX,

    Jonathan Mills, CH4 0LT

    Four words:
    You’re going to be feeling the pinch when I’ve stolen your identity and emptied out your bank account for being stupid enough to tell the entire t’interweb where you live.

  87. on 15 Oct 2008 at 4:03 pm J Mills, CH4 0LT

    ps house number is 338

  88. on 15 Oct 2008 at 4:08 pm Freddy Two Trousers

    Saatchi’s Gay!?! Nigella’s gonna be pissed off about that.

    Perhaps I could be of some comfort to her.

  89. on 15 Oct 2008 at 4:14 pm Far-Q

    “Added: Wednesday, 15 October, 2008, 05:24 GMT 06:24 UK

    Right decision and I am really impressed by the depiction and narration of plot by writer. Good luck Aravind Adiga

    Asif Chaudhary, Lahore, Pakistan”

    “Added: Wednesday, 15 October, 2008, 05:52 GMT 06:52 UK

    I went through the synopsis of book and it sound interesting and good.

    Asif Chaudhary, Lahore, Pakistan”

    You read the whole book in 28 mins! I’m impressed!

    Arthur Greenwood, Runcorn

    Synopsis: n A brief or condensed statement giving a general view of some subject.

    Arthur Greenwood, Runcorn: n A moron.
    Synonyms: fool, half-wit; imbecile; dolt, dunce, numskull, parakeet’s punani

  90. on 15 Oct 2008 at 4:43 pm Col John Matrix

    “But BEST OF ALL he sees NO irony in supporting the BNP from the Virgin Islands”

    And he also doesn’t see the irony in promoting the British National Party whilst insisting that he from England (not Britian).

    Does that mean that the BNP are a sort of English-only thing then? That’s fine by me, you can keep those cunts south of the border.

    Col. John Matrix, Scotland (not England. Or Wales. Or Northern Ireland).

  91. on 15 Oct 2008 at 4:48 pm The Public

    Chris Brett, New Romney. I’m not laughing at art or books, I’m laughing at you fucknut

  92. on 15 Oct 2008 at 5:11 pm blind pew

    Some prat hangs a dead cow on the wall and calls it art.
    Chris Brett

    That’s a fairly brusque way to refer to Da Vinci’s Madonna.

  93. on 15 Oct 2008 at 5:12 pm Mal

    it isn’t art and never, never will be art

    Not like that painting of dogs playing poker, now that’s proper art.

  94. on 15 Oct 2008 at 5:39 pm Westlothian Questionner (MSEnoch)

    “Does that mean that the BNP are a sort of English-only thing then? That’s fine by me, you can keep those cunts south of the border.”

    First they came for the Scots…

  95. on 15 Oct 2008 at 6:01 pm Far-Q

    dogs playing poker, now that’s proper art

    Nah, you can tell proper art, it’s got naked wimmin in it:
    Botticelli’s The Birth of Venus, Renoir’s The Large Bathers, Gaugin’s The Moon and the Earth (Hina tefatou), Razzle’s seminal work Miss December 1996 (fingers inserted).

  96. on 15 Oct 2008 at 6:09 pm blind pew

    What about Michaelangelo’s David? Is that art? I mean he’s got his nob out and everything. It’s just there, in your face, no warning, David’s willy, in the middle of an art gallery! I ask you! It isn’t my idea of art, that’s for sure. And don’t tell me to ‘get over it’ thank you very much. I don’t go to art galleries to look at men’s willies. Naked women is proper art cos it’s natural and women are beautiful. But some of those Italian sculptors. Anyone would think Michaelangelo batted for the other team judging by some of the intensely detailed studies of naked men I saw when I went to Florence with the wife… I thought David’s bottom looked a bit like a girl’s bottom actually.

  97. on 15 Oct 2008 at 6:19 pm Mal

    How come a Mills & Boon author never wins the award ? And before anyone laughs, Mills & Boon books are likely to be read by more people.

    Ann Onymous, Edinburgh, United Kingdom

    Possibly because Mills and Boon books are read by people who think using the name “Ann Onymous” is remotely clever or amusing.

  98. on 15 Oct 2008 at 6:22 pm Far-Q

    batted for the other team
    Middlesex?

  99. on 15 Oct 2008 at 10:37 pm Bit Special

    Blind Pew – what about the copy of Michelangelo’s David which stands IN THE STREET outside the Uffizi gallery in Florence?! Never mind his twin eye-raping pretentious art lovers/closeted homos in denial/bored school kids/Italians inside the Galleria dell’Accademia, this one’s disproportionately tiny marble knob can wreak public havoc 24-7; paedofying, gay-making and spreading Art Aids without a care in the world.

    (Intones in Brian Sewell voice) “But is it Good Art Aids or Bad Art Aids? That’s a matter of personal taste”.

  100. on 16 Oct 2008 at 12:03 am George Michael

    It’s dead tonight at the Heath, anyone fancy a game of network Doom? I’ve made a level pack centered around some of the more public toilets in North West London.

  101. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:02 am Blind Pew

    Michelangelo’s David which stands IN THE STREET outside the Uffizi gallery in Florence?!

    I knew that, it’s right next to Buenorotti’s “The Annoying Pedant with Raised Eyebrows High-lighting Petty Details”
    ;-)

  102. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:03 am Brian Sewell

    Mills and Boon?

  103. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:43 am Steve

    What a load of Ferrets sweaty flange flaps. They manage to distil all modern art down to the work of two brit artists, and totally forget that Monet, Picasso and Dali are “modern art”.

  104. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:48 am fucko the clown

    Network doom you say……

    you can be cacodemon and i’ll be a space marine and we can go at each other with big weapons.

    say 8pm on the heath?

  105. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:55 am Steve

    *insert joke about male/female network conectors here*

  106. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:59 am Fucko's Probation Officer

    C’mon Fucko, please try to be serious. You know you’re restricted from going within 250m of Hampstead Heath until May 2012. You’ve been doing very well up to now, don’t spoil it.

    Please don’t be upset, I know the lad looked 16 but the reconstruction of his colon cost the tax-payer £100,000 and calling the judge a Penguin’s Perforated Pink-Piston-Sleeve didn’t exactly help your case.
    Why don’t you get yourself a nice sensible girlfriend your own age?

  107. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:59 am Whistleblower

    “say 8pm on the heath?”

    Beware, it’s actually Mandy *pretending* to be fucko the clown ;)

  108. on 16 Oct 2008 at 10:10 am Barry Manilow

    Hey, if Mandy’s there, I’m game. If she kisses you, she’ll stop you from shaking. Best not to think of what’ll happen if she lets you put it in the brown one…

  109. on 16 Oct 2008 at 10:39 am Dingleberry

    They [HYStards] manage to distil all modern art down to the work of two brit artists.

    Lemme guess… erm… Tracey ‘Tabloid-Baiter’ Emin and Damien ‘Dead Stuff’ Hurst.

    They totally forget that Monet, Picasso and Dali are “modern art”.

    ‘forget’ implies that they once knew.

    My latest conclusion about HYS posters is that they consider attending school to GCSE endows a sufficient ammount of learning to last a lifetime and also qualifies you to rubbish Post-Graduates Reasearchers, Professors, Writers, Respected Economists and the pre-eminent thinkers of every subject, theme and faculty.

    Bless ‘em.

  110. on 16 Oct 2008 at 12:04 pm Pedro

    Well, obviously Dingle.

    Did any of those above mentioned pretenders attend the School of Hard Knocks? Or graduate with Honours from the Univeristy of Life? I think not.

    End of.

  111. on 16 Oct 2008 at 2:00 pm Alex

    You think Haider was bad? He was a pussycat compared to HC Strache

    I was on my Erasmus in Austria during election season with that cunt on every fucking wall with his shit-eating grin like he thought he was God’s gift to Aryan women and saying things like “Wien doarf nicht Istanbul weirden” and commissioning a comic strip in one of the free newspapers that portrayed him as a slogan-spouting superhero called “H.C. Man”. The fucking cunt. Seriously, the cunt. I fucking hate him I FUCKING FUCKSHIT FUCKING HATE H.C. FUCKING SHITCUNT FUCK STRACHE.

    The most beautiful, heart-warming thing about Haider’s demise is that he was doing nearly 90 mph in a 40 mph speed limit zone. You could make it up, but I didn’t, I read it on the news.

    What do you mean “nearly 90mph”. He was doing exactly 88mph, probably in the hope of carrying out Gilly’s suggestion.

  112. on 16 Oct 2008 at 2:25 pm Blind Pew

    The School of Hard Knocks?

    Pah! The school of gentle little taps on the arm with three health and safety officers supervising and a qualified nurse standing by, more like.

    Not like in my day. Day One, Lesson One: a series of well-aimed, vicious kicks to the testes.

  113. on 16 Oct 2008 at 3:42 pm Dirty Great Welsh Gay Boy

    Look, let’s sort out this ‘is-he-isn’t-he-a-closet?’ thing.

    I’m in Swansea next week, just to see the folks, so I’ll drop round to Rob’s and see whether I can get it sucked. And I’ll also see how quickly he, erm, gets over it when my latterly neglected homme-à-homme technique has him whimpering like a baby and begging for more. Deal or no deal?

    Relax, I’m in the Gaydar ‘pick up a closet’ room.

  114. on 16 Oct 2008 at 3:48 pm Dirty Great Welsh Gay Boy

    PS My £10 a month paid for that fucking Stonewall campaign. I’m over it.

  115. on 16 Oct 2008 at 7:17 pm Bit Special

    Blind Pew – petty details, like, say, pointing out that there’s no hyphen in the word highlighting….?

    (Eyebrows explode)

  116. on 16 Oct 2008 at 9:25 pm Kelvin

    PS My £10 a month paid for that fucking Stonewall campaign. I’m over it.

    Do we have to go over this again? Subscribing to TwinksAndBears.co.uk does not make you a gay rights activist.

  117. on 15 Nov 2008 at 11:21 pm lgiunzscxv

    blah blah blah.blah blah.blah blah.blah blah.blah