Permanently Bewildered04 Jun 2009 01:18 pm

18-Wheeled Fuck

By Nelson

Thanks to Christine and Drew for finding this one over at the Telegraph site. It’s about painting stuff white to mitigate the effects of global warming. A bit like wearing earplugs because your TV is too loud.

Make sure you imagine all the random CAPSLOCK BITS being SHOUTED twice as loud as THE OTHER BITS.

I wish I could think of something ORIGINAL & witty right now, but the MORE IMPORTANT message I have for everyone is this:
Instead of spending another 10 minutes on this comment board, why not write a REAL, PAPER LETTER to this NUTCASE Shu ( or whatever his FKG name is ) & TELL HIM how much of a Truck-up (rhymes with) he is…
HE NEEDS AN 18 WHEELER TRUCK FULL OF HATE MAIL — EVERY TIME THESE JACKGLASSES ( rhymes with ) SAYS SOMETHING STUPID LIKE THIS, WE NEED TO COVER THEM UP WITH PAPER.
E-MAILS DO NOT MAKE FOR PHOTO-OPS, PEOPLE.
SEND ‘EM…. Just use his name, then ” US Department of Energy”, then Washington, DC, 20515.
It WILL get there….
THIS MORON AND THE REST OF ‘EM NEED TO HEAR FROM US EVERY STINKIN TIME THEY OPEN THEIR PIE-HOLES AND STUPID SIT (rhymes with) FLOWS OUT OF IT.
-30-
Gore_Idiot_Sans_Savant

You have to respect the honesty of someone who effectively precedes their brainsquawk with an admission that “I have neither the insight nor wit to make this anything other than bollocks but, fuck it, here goes anyway”.

I think he or she is doing themselves a disservice though. “JACKGLASSES (rhymes with)” is comedy genius.

38 Responses to “18-Wheeled Fuck”

  1. on 04 Jun 2009 at 1:25 pm   pigfrottage

    Janet’s comment is best

    I can’t believe that there are so may ignoramuses out there. You know more than a professer of physics?
    None of you obviously understand
    the science behind this idea.
    You should all go back to reading the SUN.

    How is reading the Sun goung to help them with their understanding of science?

  2. on 04 Jun 2009 at 1:26 pm   pigfrottage

    blockquote error.

    Must…
    Refrain…
    From…
    Slapping…
    Myself…

    Ow!

  3. on 04 Jun 2009 at 1:39 pm   Vile

    Gore_Idiot_Sans_Savant is a WANK ORANGE (rhymes with).

  4. on 04 Jun 2009 at 1:41 pm   Stoof

    What an absolute BROTHER-TRUCKING PUNT (rhymes with).

  5. on 04 Jun 2009 at 1:56 pm   WHITEANGLOSAXONPROTESTANTand VICTIMSED

    Janets comment
    seems to be written
    in some form
    of poetry

    Maybe she should get published

  6. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:04 pm   antandbee

    “why not write a REAL, PAPER LETTER to this NUTCASE Shu ( or whatever his FKG name is ) ”

    Because these forrin names are so hard to spell, especially when they’re written write in front of you. -__-

  7. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:08 pm   Philbert

    My favourite comment is

    Notice how the “reporter” of this article (By Louise Gray, Environment Correspondent) sprinkles her article with “Nobel Prize Winner” and “Nobel Laureate) when describing the people that concur with this suggestion and Global Warming in general. Well, they must be right – afterall, they are Nobel Laureates. What crap – most of these Laureates get the distinction because they have the politically correct positions – not because they are right or more intelligent than the rest of us. These people (scientists) are basically politicians and tow a political agenda around with them. I think they are IDIOTS dressed up in suits (empty ones, at that – like the Empty Suit Obama).

    Disappointingly, the poster (Ian Twolan) doesn’t explain what the politically correct position on the laser cooling and trapping of atoms actually is, so I’m left to guess that it involves only trapping white atoms, or something.

  8. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:14 pm   Santa Claus

    I don’t know if I should laugh or cry.
    White reflect the sun, it would blind us while driving. Definitely there will be fewer cars on the road, since the number of fatality will increase.

    Yes this would be a problem IF YOU DRIVE ON ROOFS.

  9. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:20 pm   Rich(MMath)(Oxon)

    to this NUTCASE Shu ( or whatever his FKG name is )

    I’m confused. What does FKG mean. It doesn’t rhyme with anything.

  10. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:29 pm   Rich(MMath)(Oxon)

    Of course we all know what their problem with this idea is. Their worried that goverments will eventually only sell white paint, at which point, “blacking up” will be impossible.

    You couldn’t make it up!!11!?

  11. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:39 pm   Joe C

    Perhaps the west should start some sort of exchange programme with North Korea. We could swap one of our idiots for one of their citizens. This would be a win-win situation – the North Koreans would be free of the oppressive regime, we’d be free of idiots like the guy quoted above, and Kim Jong-il would have a country of docile zombies to rule over. Hurrah!

  12. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:40 pm   AndyS

    it’s nice they’re trying to be clever with their username but while idiot-savant is a knowing idiot, surely idiot-sans-savant is pigeon french for ‘i’m an idiot who knows fuck all’

    and then they write 18 wheeler trucks full of gibberish to hammer home their point.

    [blockquote]Just use his name, then ” US Department of Energy”, then Washington, DC, 20515.[/blockquote]

    this (badly) reminds me of derek and clive writing to the director general of the bbc.

  13. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:41 pm   AndyS

    fucksocks

  14. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:44 pm   Mr Cat

    The comments in that thread are like a mine of gold…

    I know that on the surface it sounds stupid to paint the roofs white, but it would reflect a lot of the heat. I would like them to painted forest green or have roof top gardens in place on flat roofs if possible. That would absorb heat, clean the air and maybe you could grow small vegetable plants like berries or beans.

    Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww

  15. on 04 Jun 2009 at 2:53 pm   fucko the clown

    makes sense to me, i am going to white wash my balls as a sign of support

  16. on 04 Jun 2009 at 3:39 pm   Theodore H Biscuit

    Eco-nutcases like Gore_Idiot_Sans_Savant tend to selectively choose scientific reports to justify to themselves that the nonsense that they have been fooled into believing is the truth – and that they are not total cunts.
    Always quick to dismiss a contrary point of view or items of research that makes their rock-solid view point look stupid.
    To avoid looking stupid, I would suggest shutting the fuck up would be a good place to start.

  17. on 04 Jun 2009 at 3:56 pm   James

    FKG – wasn’t that the ‘official’ name of either West or East Germany?

    Hold on, putting official in inverted commas made it sound sarcastic and HYS-esque – should have written it as OFFICIAL or A VISUAL (rhymes with)…

  18. on 04 Jun 2009 at 4:01 pm   Kwai Chang Kane

    Never mind all this. I am frothing in anticipation at the mournography-fest associated with “David Carradine – Your Thoughts”.

  19. on 04 Jun 2009 at 4:02 pm   Trilby

    MUCKFUPPET

  20. on 04 Jun 2009 at 4:08 pm   Dr Feelgood

    I’m guessing from the reference to 18-wheelers (and a few other clues) that Gore_Idiot_Sans_Savant is from the North American colonies.

    Drudge Report often links to British papers and this is the result.

    Bloody typical innit, bloody forruns coming over ‘ere… etc…

  21. on 04 Jun 2009 at 4:15 pm   Philbert

    Dr Feelgood

    I’m guessing from the reference to 18-wheelers (and a few other clues) that Gore_Idiot_Sans_Savant is from the North American colonies.

    Drudge Report often links to British papers and this is the result.

    Bloody typical innit, bloody forruns coming over ‘ere… etc…

    I hope the comments pages for papers like the New York Times are gradually being filled up by retired colonels from the Home Counties complaining about the closure of rural Post Offices. Fair exchange and all that.

  22. on 04 Jun 2009 at 4:25 pm   Mr Poo

    Strikes me that the writer of the article itself might be a bit of a muppet, as well.

    More pale surfaces could also slow global warming by reflecting heat into space rather than allowing it to be absorbed by dark surfaces where it is trapped by greenhouse gases and increases temperatures.

    Now, I am not a climatologist, and I can certainly accept that increasing the albedo of the earth’s surface must result in more solar radiation being bounced back into space where it belongs, the foreign filth. However, I fail to see how any of this will stop a certain percentage of it being bounced back in again by that pro-integration greenhouse gas layer, which lives in the atmosphere, and not, as pretend the Telegraph, in “dark surfaces”*. In fact, it won’t stop the greenhouse gas layer doing its thing at all, merely counteract some of its effects.

    You couldn’t make it up. Unless you were a telegraph hack, of course.

    * I am led to believe the original draft referred to “them darkies”, but the PC brigade made them change it.

  23. on 04 Jun 2009 at 5:16 pm   Bit Special

    g-i-s-s is a total Steve Punt. That’s not rhyming slang for cunt; I just mean that he’s a lot less funny than he thinks he is. Although he IS also a cunt.

    Big Brother starts tonight – can’t wait for the onslaught of outraged twatbasketry on HYS, etc. …

  24. on 04 Jun 2009 at 5:36 pm   The Idle Johnson

    Right wing Yanks (rhymes with) are damn, fucking (doesn’t rhyme with) angry since they lost their wonderful country to a commie muslim. If Britain (doesn’t rhyme with once great Britain) went the same way I too would be CAPS LOCKING myself into a frenzy of bile and SPUNK (rhymes with, or does it?)!!111!! It’s a good job we’ve got the BNP (rhymes with) to save us from such a calamitous event.

  25. on 04 Jun 2009 at 6:15 pm   Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

    Mr Poo,

    It does make sense, it just isn’t well explained in the article. Greenhouse gases are only opaque to infrared radiation. So, if sunlight comes in, is absorbed by a dark surface, and the energy is then re-emitted as infrared radiation, as a thermal blackbody at room temperature is wont to do, then the energy can’t escape. If instead sunlight is reflected back as visible light, it can merrily pass back through the atmosphere to space as the gases are transparent to visible wavelengths. I speak as one who had the misfortune to have a compulsory climate physics module this year :(

  26. on 04 Jun 2009 at 6:17 pm   Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

    Oops, I think I missed the chance for a bad joke of some kind involving thermal blackbodies. Oh well.

  27. on 04 Jun 2009 at 6:23 pm   Mr Poo

    Ms. Stewart-Baxter

    You’re right of course, and I’d completely forgotten about the wavelength issues. Now, about all these hot black bodies, radiating in unison. Mmmm….

  28. on 04 Jun 2009 at 9:41 pm   The Idle Johnson

    Ms Stewart-Baxter and Mr Poo, you’re both very much mistaken in your scientific assumptions. It is God what breathes up the nanofarts of infrared wotsits, thus polluting the atmosphere but only for a few seconds until His gob is full of flatulent sunbeams and that. It says so in the Bible, somewhere.

  29. on 05 Jun 2009 at 12:58 am   Hitler's penis

    I wish I could think of something ORIGINAL & witty right now

    I wish you bloody could have too.

  30. on 05 Jun 2009 at 1:03 am   west-bootle baptist church

    mr johnson!

    your view of god (whilst touching, in a get-well-card sort of way) is completely misinformed.

    eny fule kno that jehovah likes us to smite enemies, lie with handmaids, stone recalcitrant offspring to death, and refuse to share park benches with foreigners and others who hath an issue out of his flesh.

    hope that clears things up.

    love and kisses,
    a well-wisher

  31. on 05 Jun 2009 at 1:04 am   Gobbler the Oral Sex Alsatian

    grrr
    wuff WUFF WUFF
    rhymes with MUFF
    WUFF wuff
    slurp slurp slurp
    etc.

  32. on 05 Jun 2009 at 1:36 pm   steve

    Ms Stewart-Baxter and Mr Poo

    You need to get out more…

  33. on 05 Jun 2009 at 2:17 pm   Oxford University

    “Wait a minute! If we paint all the roofs white it will reflect back to the Sun which will make it hotter & destroy it which will destroy Earth. Simple logic says this is not a good idea!” – Alan

    Dear Alan,
    You are, of course, entirely correct. Your MPhys is in the post as we speak.

  34. on 06 Jun 2009 at 10:48 pm   LutonDiesel

    ‘“JACKGLASSES (rhymes with)” is comedy genius.’

    Maybe it’s a subtly contemptuous reference to Pastor Jack Glass of the Free Presbyterian Church of Scotland (I think that’s what it’s called; in any event it’s not the “wee frees”, but the Paisleyite faction who picketed the Pope on his visit to Britain in 1981). On the part of a laudably free-thinking secularist who has no time for all that sky-daddy nonsense that is singlehandedly responsible for all the world’s ills.

  35. on 07 Jun 2009 at 3:57 am   radishey

    I think this deserves a dramatic reading.

  36. on 07 Jun 2009 at 6:21 pm   Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

    @ steve

    I heartily concur.

  37. on 09 Jun 2009 at 12:10 pm   john Adair's Gerbil

    I bet Mr. Savant has a garage full of black paint.

  38. on 11 Jun 2009 at 4:21 pm   GiveItAGo

    Oh sweet Jesus I wish I hadn’t read that Telegraph thread. Fucksticks. Jus’ goin’ home for a cry.