spEak You're bRanes

Armchair Generals and The Regular Twats08 Sep 2009 09:25 am

By Nelson

Something about war.

“Declaration of war by Great Britain was not followed up with any military actions against Germany. Poland was abandoned by its allies…Why do we always say that Great Britain declared the war on Germany if it sat still and did not help its friend?
Marcin, Hartford, CT”

The fact is, we could not defend Poland as it was too far away, across hostile territory and we didn’t have the means. If wishes were horses, eh?
potato lord, cardiff

You’d have shit horses.

Germany was victorious in the war declared by Britain because she inflicted more harm compared to what she incurred.
wodgot, uk

Britain lost 400,000 in WW2. Germany lost between 6-8 million. The famous Luftwaffe raid on Coventry killed 800. At Hamburg the RAF killed 40,000 and at Dresden possibly 100,000. By the end of the war every major German city was reduced to cinders and their country occupied for 50 years. Germany lost very badly indeed.
[Peter_Sym], Nottingham

I made you a t-shirt.

My dad went to war and all I got was this lousy erection!

177 Responses to “Massive Horny War”

on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:29 am blah de blah hurrah!

blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:30 am Liberal Left And Proud

Germans might as well have won the bloody war anyway. The EU is Hitler’s dream become reality. Apart from the deathcamps and lederhosen that is. Oh, and the fascism.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:37 am :)
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:37 am I DEMAND FREE SPEACH

Its censorship gone mad, or maybe its ZOG’s tentacles spreading across the interweb. Or Nelson finally getting fed up.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:37 am wrathofthemath

Hurrah!! the blah filter is back!! Thank fucking fuck!!!!!!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:38 am I Like it, it changes!

blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:47 am Bit Special AKA La Spesh

Why do we always say that Great Britain declared the war on Germany if it sat still and did not help its friend?

For Marcin, ‘Two Little Boys’ by Rolf Harris isn’t so much a maudlin pop hit as a philosophy for life.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:52 am Jim

Oh thank god
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:14 am Hunter Hillman

In other news, we’re paying £1 billion to be exterminated.

Good old Biased BBC:

http://opinionbeyondeducation.blogspot.com/2009/09/and-in-other-news-we-are-paying.html
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:16 am I love you, keep it this way

So, what does this button do?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:18 am john Adair's Gerbil

This isn’t going to end wall.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:21 am john Adair's Gerbil The blah changes! Nice

Blah? Ringpiece. Blah.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:24 am Oaf

Oh no. The blah filter doesn’t work for me.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:24 am Oaf

About time too.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:27 am Fox Bummer

Oh God, not the blah filter!
Mind you, it’s given me a new moniker and a reason to get some work done.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:42 am Wilf

what’s all this blahing?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:42 am Dunstable

Why the blah filter? Surely it would be more entertaining to block John Adair et al and carry on with the fun.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:42 am Wilf

Ok, now I’m confused?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:09 am Lovely blahs!

About blahdy time.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:11 am tegid

Well, I for one agree. I mean, I fought in both world wars and in Iraq (not forgetting the crusades), and I definately think that the English (not British won every time.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:13 am John Adair

The comments on this thread are typical of the infantile attitudes that i have come to expect
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:13 am That Bloke in the Corner

ooo, new thread, shame BNP tossers have invoked the wrath of the blah filter though, but there you go.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:14 am That Bloke in the Corner

@john adair, will you please fuck off, the blah filter is your fault-what am i going to do now to waste time at work?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:17 am John Adair's sister

Yawn!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:18 am Hannibal Lector

What the fuck’s going on?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:20 am Can Nelson explain the Blah Filter for the Newbies?

I love Wombleporn, it’s great.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:28 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

Ooh, how exciting! I’ve never seen the blah filter in action before

(blatant pointless post to see what kind of blahing it turns in to)

Oh, and those HYSs up there look disappointingly sane-ish. More crazy, please?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:43 am That Guy

Hello!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:46 am Lell

Hail to the blah filter
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:52 am Malcolm Muggeridge

Particularly eloquent blahdy blah.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:53 am More of this sort of thing!

thank goodness for that!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:57 am John Adair's sister

infantile cunts
on 08 Sep 2009 at 11:58 am My Foot Hurts.

th@’ll T ch’em!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:00 pm Rod Wrongnob

blah blahdy blahdy blah blah blah blah blahdy erection blah blah blahdy blah blah Brandenburg Gate!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:01 pm Felna

all hail the blah filter!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:08 pm Oaf

Oafs are immune from blahing (it’s genetic).
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:09 pm Oaf

it’s it’s grog noblong tricycle yah ommlette fish finger radish.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:09 pm Oaf

””””””””””””””
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:10 pm Oaf

This is much better than the old blah filter.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:11 pm Hello all at SYB, love you and missing you, see you all when comments are renabled, Love John Adair, XXX

Blah, LiberalLeftAndProud is a big girls blouse, Blah!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:17 pm She was deathly afraid of the flu.She asked her Doc what she should do,He jabbed her unseen, with a swineflu vacine, blurting "darling I haven't a clue

Blarble
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:18 pm Even the BBC let you have your say!

Hi, to all at Blah your branes
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:26 pm Expert Scientist Blah

I give my seal of scientific approval to this filter.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:52 pm I Fisted John Adair And He Gave Birth to Blah

It wasn’t very erotic
on 08 Sep 2009 at 12:54 pm 198 i9s a shit book anyway and only puftas read books

My cock hurts
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:00 pm Very Tenables

More wankfat
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:01 pm Very Tenables

Send a postcard, at least.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:14 pm So this is the fabled blah filter? On balance I can't help feeling it's for the best. P.S. £5 for the first person to enable blockquotes in their name.

bleught
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:15 pm George

Thank Christ.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:24 pm Oh well, I'll just have to go over to Neil Craig's blog and take the piss out him there

Neil Criag = Nazi wanker
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:31 pm Could someone kindly explain wtf is going on with these comments?

blah blah blah blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:32 pm Disable blah filter here

[BLAH]
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:39 pm First sensible thing John Adair's ever said.

Blah. Blah-blah. Bladdidly Blah. Bifurcated bumhole.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:53 pm Wee Willie Watermelon

But what if I don’t bum foxes?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 1:58 pm "Even the BBC let you have your say!" If you like the BBC so much why don't you go live there?

There was a dead fox in the road on my way to work, actually.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:10 pm Foxes

Our bums hurt.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:15 pm Everyone who is going to vote BNP say blah

Blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:18 pm "Even the BBC let you have your say!" If you like the BBC so much why don't you go live there?

Everyone who thinks John Adair and friends are wankers say blah. Can we have the blah filter on usernames too?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:22 pm HOORAY FOR THE BLAH FILTER!

Yay the blah filter is back and I, for one, coldn’t be happier!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:25 pm Go to Neil Craigs Website, it's much more interesting than this one and he allows free speech!

Blow Blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:30 pm That Bloke in the Corner

New thread? no blah filter, we promise not to encourage the fucktards.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:32 pm Yes, all you BNP tossers go to Neil Craigs (sic) website. Go on, it's great. Shut the door behind you.

bumholes
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:39 pm the liberal left, the liberal left, the liberal left are gay, they cant wait for the blah filter, so that we all go away.

Boing!!!!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:39 pm How many blahs would a blah filter blah

…if a blah filter blockquote blah.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:56 pm give me 5 pounds

I like the blah!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:56 pm give me 5 pounds

Doesn’t work.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:58 pm That Bloke in the Corner

Blah, blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,
blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,blah,-FACT
on 08 Sep 2009 at 2:59 pm If, you don't blah the names, then I can write comments there instead. Simples. Neil Craig is a cockmonkey!

Blah! Does this break it.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:02 pm I tried putting blockquotes in my name, but it didn't work, can I get £5 anyway?

What’s the blahdy point?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:05 pm John Adair's sister

dfdsafdsaffffffffffffdsaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaer
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:07 pm Neil Craig on question time debating Britains role in the Balkan war

Blah poo blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:11 pm Melanie Phillips posing in a Burkini with Neil Craig on top.

Burkiki Blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:15 pm Neil Craig washed my cock with his spit while John Adair put things up his bum

it’s true
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:17 pm dirigible

Thank fuck for that.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:19 pm dirigible

Blah blah blah blahblah. Blah! Blah blahblah blah blah blahblah.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:45 pm John Adair's mum here, anyone got any mouthwash?

flobalob flobalob flobalob?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:49 pm tester

Is the blah filter still on?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:50 pm strange

wots gawing orn aht sYb?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:52 pm I dun busted der filter, i think

eet ees dee speelin zat duz eet!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:53 pm foiled again

back to work
on 08 Sep 2009 at 3:58 pm when we all get over-excited, blah happens

and potato lord and wodgot are a rancid racoons’ ringpiece.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:07 pm John Adair's sister

mouth was is in the cupboard where John left it after sleucing his arsehole prior to his felching session !
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:15 pm Is it terribly bad form for me to give a plug for the "Digital soup kitchen for people fleeing the blah filter" here in the name field Nelson?

Blahdy blah blah blah/
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:16 pm A thousand pounds to anyone who can install the blah filter on HYS!

Blahdy twatbasket blah!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:33 pm Come and join John on the naughtystep

Blah your branes
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:33 pm SAY BLAH IF YOU LOVE ME

I DIDN’T Vote nuliarbore becuze they suck willys.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:33 pm SAY BLAH IF YOU LOVE ME

blah?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 4:53 pm Blah crimer with a free blah

I’m intrigued to see exactly what proportion of my comments will be converted to the word blah. I wonder if some keywords such as Daily Mail and 1984 will remain?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 5:03 pm This is worth a blahdy shot I'm going to blah my branes out!

Burble blah blah blahdy.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 5:03 pm This is worth a blahdy shot I'm going to blah my branes out!

Shitters
on 08 Sep 2009 at 5:17 pm THANK CHRIST

ABOUT TIME
on 08 Sep 2009 at 5:21 pm Shackleton

Bring the blah filter back!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 5:49 pm BNPer

We should nefer ave gon to war with Germany anyway

Hitler was a fine man

Nick Griffin told me that

Blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 5:49 pm BNPer

No I don’t

I vote BNP

I sign my name on the ballot paper!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 6:38 pm Ed van Nearly Adair

Oh for fuck’s sake.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 6:40 pm Ed van Nearly Adair

The blah filter is broken in that it’s converting the apostrophe to the number 8217 instead of &8217.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 6:41 pm Blah filter fails on apostrophe: misses out ampersand character

Blah failter
on 08 Sep 2009 at 6:43 pm RSS comments feed is only showing 10 comments: expect a setting is set far too low

Humour negative pressure
on 08 Sep 2009 at 6:51 pm However annoying the BNP turd-flood was, the interactivity of commenting was more fun than it just being Nelson's soap box

Blah this
on 08 Sep 2009 at 6:52 pm No disrespect to Nelson intended, of course

Blah filters substitute for humour
on 08 Sep 2009 at 7:15 pm The sleazy-but-right-on man who lusts after Guardian Columnists

Fuck Blah!

Loving the blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 7:27 pm Can we go back to morse code? :D

Can we? Went a little something like ‘ ‘ / / / ‘ ‘ / ”’/

Did it blah work baa blah?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 7:28 pm Evidently not :(

But generally yay hooray balh fliter better than HYSers brain farts!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 7:37 pm the blah from the other side

halb halb halb
on 08 Sep 2009 at 7:38 pm the blah from the other side

blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 7:39 pm Every Blah on here is a vote for the Britiash National Party, Blah away!

Neil Craig for King, Melanie Phillips for Queen.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 8:02 pm FUck your fucking blah filter you fuck

Why are you wrecking your own site like this?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 8:22 pm Sam

Blah?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 8:36 pm Did someone say something about raping Sarah Palin again?

Well did you?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 8:56 pm Why have a new thread if blah filter is on

Just a test.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:05 pm New post, surely. new thread merely coincidental. This is Nelson's vanity project, not ours. Or something.

I bum foxes.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:06 pm Is this working?

Or are my fox-bumming ways just too hot to blah?
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:07 pm George

With that west country grin that says ‘Ill give you kick out the jams’.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:36 pm Blah witch

Hello. Blah. BNP? rollocks. blah blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:37 pm TomTom

The funny thing is, I really DO bum foxes! Right up the arse! Have some of THAT, fox!
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:56 pm Help with a blah problem please

“Why no work”? Rubbish…….. :$
on 08 Sep 2009 at 9:57 pm Well, you shouldn't, Tom Tom. It's not fair on the poor beasts.

Blah
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:29 pm "I bum foxes" "foxes: our bumes hurt" even with the boring blah filter it's still hilarious here. plz renable all the old comments but keep the new ones blahed i want to find out about the racist who first made the blah filter... anyway yh, make a thread

i bum vixen.
on 08 Sep 2009 at 10:35 pm IT HAS ARRIVED AGAIN. THE CURSE OF BLAH HAS BEEN REIGHNED UPON US FOR OUR VILLOUNOUS CRIMES. REPENT RRREEEPPEENTT

and we may yet be saved
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:04 am Eleanor

What exactly triggers the word filter anyway?
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:04 am Eleanor

Hahahaha this filter is ACE
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:04 am Eleanor

blah blah blah blahdy
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:45 am Licky sticky

Twatbaskets
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:45 am Barack Oblahma

This is great – hope it gets rid of the rightwing fucktard cunt bastards!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:46 am Licky sticky

Bastard filtration – kiss my arse, you donkeyfrotter.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:46 am Foxes Bum ME

Ooooh yes, this is fun – crack open a jeroboam old chap! I’m just writing crap now just to make blah filter jokes, ho hum.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:47 am Licky sticky. This is quite funny actually

bollocks
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:48 am Licky sticky. This is quite funny actually

Stalin knobbed me once you know.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:49 am Licky sticky. This is quite funny actually

Duplicate comment filter? Fuck OFF!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:50 am I bum fox's glacier mints

Yes.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 1:23 am Icarus Smicarus
on 09 Sep 2009 at 1:27 am I bum typical liberals. why are zanulieblah scared of free speech this would never have happened under winston thatcher i bum foxes

I like black people
on 09 Sep 2009 at 1:59 am I can't stop refreshing. It is much better than doing real things with my time.

I love Nelson xxxxx
on 09 Sep 2009 at 2:56 am The British National Party are the future of Great Britain, Liberal Leftism is dead hence the Blah filter

Nelson is cool
on 09 Sep 2009 at 3:05 am London G20 meeting rejects plan to cap bankers' bonuses

I vote Nelson
on 09 Sep 2009 at 3:09 am I am not a racist, I shag black ladies, they are very good.

Izzy wizzy, lets get bizzy, blah filter off
on 09 Sep 2009 at 3:35 am mmm... filtered blah

I fox bummers
on 09 Sep 2009 at 5:38 am TomTom

The foxes love it, I’ll have you know… so how come somebody replied to my post in their name, when it only appeared all blahed out? Has somebody de-blahed the blah filter?

PS. Blah.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 6:44 am Just comment in your name. Carry on.

x
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:11 am I think it;'s an improvement.

I like it!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:11 am I think it's an improvement.

But I can’t type apostrophes properly.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:13 am Harry Secombe's Ghost

Tenor: There’s a song that I recall
My mother sang to me.
Spriggs (off): Oh! (a sigh)
Tenor: She sang it as she tucked me in
When I was ninety-three.

(harp plays a rising chord…)

Spriggs: I diddle, I. Who was that bum?

Bluebottle + Spriggs:
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po,
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong (bluebottle drops behind)
Ying tong iddle I po
Spriggs: Keep lad up. Keep.
Bluebottle: Keep up lad up.

Both: Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Spriggs: lad
Both: Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po (lad)
Iddle I po (lad)

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong (Spriggs: iddle) (Bluebottle: ying tong)
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong iddle

Bluebottle (spoken):
Ying tong iddle I po!
(short raspberry, Secombe)

Both: Oh!
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po!

(trumpet bit)

Bluebottle:
Ying. Ying tongy tongy.
Ying tong iddle I po.
Ying tong iddle I po.
(Secombe under this: What a lovely lovely boy!)
(or Secombe under this: What a lovely melody devine!)
Ying ying ying tongy tongy.
(Milligan: Get out the rifle, sir.)
(or Milligan: Get off the record.)
Yeeeng.
Ying tong ying tong d’gy-n’o.
Ying tong d’ga.
(Secombe: Get away.)
D’g d’g d’ga.
Ying tong iddle I po.

Seagoon:Hear that crazy rhythm
Driving me insane.
Strike your partner on the bonce (bonk?).
(thump)
Eccles: Ooh. I felt no pain.
(Seagoon screeches)

Seagoon, Bluebottle and Eccles:
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying…

(harp chord rises)

Soprano: Take me back to Vienna….

(Raspberry section, probably Milligan)

Bloodnok: Ohhhhh!
Eccles: Oh!

(harp chord)

Soprano: Take me back to Vienna, where the….

(crash!)

Seagoon, Spriggs and Bluebottle (far off):
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po

(mad dash to foreground)

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
(Spriggs: where’s he going lad?)
(BB: I don’t know)
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po

Seagoon: LOOK OUT!
(cry from Bluebottle)

(mad dash to distance)

(hastily)
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po

(dash to foreground)

Ying tong…

(whine of bomb dropping, explosion)

Double speed, but same tempo, Goons:

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po.

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po.

One: Ying! Tongy tongy tongy.
Yiddy diddy diddy da daaa. Ying diddy.
Ying tong diddle. Yiddada boo.
(rhythmic thigh slapping, raspberry)

All Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po.

Eccles: Whoooooh!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:13 am No, Tom Tom, I haven't deblahed it. I'm psychic, that's how come...

blah blah
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:13 am Harry Secombe's Ghost

Tenor: There’s a song that I recall
My mother sang to me.
Spriggs (off): Oh! (a sigh)
Tenor: She sang it as she tucked me in
When I was ninety-three.

(harp plays a rising chord…)

Spriggs: I diddle, I. Who was that bum?

Bluebottle + Spriggs:
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po,
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong (bluebottle drops behind)
Ying tong iddle I po
Spriggs: Keep lad up. Keep.
Bluebottle: Keep up lad up.

Both: Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Spriggs: lad
Both: Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po (lad)
Iddle I po (lad)

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong (Spriggs: iddle) (Bluebottle: ying tong)
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong iddle

Bluebottle (spoken):
Ying tong iddle I po!
(short raspberry, Secombe)

Both: Oh!
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po!

(trumpet bit)

Bluebottle:
Ying. Ying tongy tongy.
Ying tong iddle I po.
Ying tong iddle I po.
(Secombe under this: What a lovely lovely boy!)
(or Secombe under this: What a lovely melody devine!)
Ying ying ying tongy tongy.
(Milligan: Get out the rifle, sir.)
(or Milligan: Get off the record.)
Yeeeng.
Ying tong ying tong d’gy-n’o.
Ying tong d’ga.
(Secombe: Get away.)
D’g d’g d’ga.
Ying tong iddle I po.

Seagoon:Hear that crazy rhythm
Driving me insane.
Strike your partner on the bonce (bonk?).
(thump)
Eccles: Ooh. I felt no pain.
(Seagoon screeches)

Seagoon, Bluebottle and Eccles:
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying…

(harp chord rises)

Soprano: Take me back to Vienna….

(Raspberry section, probably Milligan)

Bloodnok: Ohhhhh!
Eccles: Oh!

(harp chord)

Soprano: Take me back to Vienna, where the….

(crash!)

Seagoon, Spriggs and Bluebottle (far off):
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po

(mad dash to foreground)

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
(Spriggs: where’s he going lad?)
(BB: I don’t know)
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po

Seagoon: LOOK OUT!
(cry from Bluebottle)

(mad dash to distance)

(hastily)
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po

(dash to foreground)

Ying tong…

(whine of bomb dropping, explosion)

Double speed, but same tempo, Goons:

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po.

Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po.

One: Ying! Tongy tongy tongy.
Yiddy diddy diddy da daaa. Ying diddy.
Ying tong diddle. Yiddada boo.

All Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle
Ying tong iddle I po
Ying tong ying tong
Ying tong iddle I po
Iddle I po.

Eccles: Whoooooh!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:14 am Cheese and Marmalade

Well.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:15 am Goat Trousers

I think I have deblahed it.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:47 am Tom Cruise

Scientology saves blahs.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:47 am Tom Cruise's anus

Help me.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 8:49 am Tom Cruise's fox's anus

Help me too.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 9:31 am It don't matter if you're blahk or white

I wish to discuss the Mercury Prize. The Mercury music prize is a famously difficult beast to love. The reasons are myriad, but not least among them is the sense that its self-important air of intellectualism is a bit of a con: for all its broadcast-on-BBC2, helmed-by-a-professor, untainted-by-vulgar-commercial-considerations air, the entire thing is a marketing exercise, dreamed up to flog new albums to thirtysomething men in the traditionally “dead” period for record sales between July (when the nominees are announced) and September.
Slagging off the prize is a national sport, indulged in by everyone with a passing interest in music, including record company executives, rock critics, music fans and bloggers, the latter exceptionally creative in their criticism. If you’re a rock critic, saying you think they might have got it right feels like revoking your membership of a well-loved club, or refusing to indulge in a grand British tradition, like going shopping during the Cup final or having a Pot Noodle for Christmas lunch.

But if the debut album by London-based rapper Speech Debelle isn’t the most musically adventurous of the nominees – it certainly doesn’t deliver anything like the forward-looking sonic shock provided by the last hip-hop album to win the Mercury, Dizzee Rascal’s Boy in the Corner – and the artist who made it has some deeply peculiar opinions about her fellow pop stars (“Jesus went around preaching the gospel and touching people to make the blind see and making lepers better. Michael Jackson’s gone around the world and done that,” she opined in a London freesheet yesterday), it’s an intriguing, abeautifully made album, with a sound based less around samples than acoustic guitars and pianos.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 9:33 am It don't matter if you're blahk or white

Speech Debelle should of won prize it should been Nick Griifin.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 9:34 am It don't matter if you're blahk or white

Crabcakes.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 9:40 am himwiththecyst

Blah…

Blah-blah, blah-blah-blah-BLAH…

Blah-blah-blah-BLAH… Hey, Jude…
on 09 Sep 2009 at 9:57 am Crabcakes

Better than turnip cakes.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:40 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

‘wensleydale edam rochefort gorgonzola’
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:41 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

‘blah woop escape from the blah blah’
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:42 am Blahking

YES!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:42 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

‘piffle oh bugger maybe not then gouda’
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:47 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

If If If If If If I I I I I write write write write write write every every every every every word word word word word 5 5 5 5 5 times times times times times maybe maybe maybe maybe maybe this this this this this will will will will will become become become become become readable readable readable readable readable between between between between between all all all all all the the the the the blah blah blah blah blah and and and and and and fox fox fox fox fox bummming bummming bummming bummming bummming?
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:48 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter

Arse
on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:50 am Marjorie Stewart-Baxter isn't going to spend all morning trying in vain to evade the blah filter, honest, that would be a waste of time and stuff...

blah
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:11 am Tom Cruise's fox's anus' seepage

Help me to help myself.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:12 am Tom Cruise's fox's anus' seepage's bacteria

Remember the Alamo.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:13 am Tom Cruise's fox's anus' seepage's bacteria's agent

Proctology Report.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:16 am spungin imgrunt

I agree. Good point.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:35 am blahdy immigrunts

who is this neil craig guy anyway
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:35 am Back to blah

does anyone like foxes?
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:37 am Whoever enjoyed the comments is wrong and is a grotesquely ugly freak

RIGHT.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 11:55 am John Adair is so cool, that man is no ones fool,

Nelson Nelson Nelson
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:25 pm Where are my posts? I want them put on a CD and posted to me

Blah blah censored blah blah couldn’t make it up blah blah PC Gone Mad blah blah Orwellian nightmare barble blahdy bollocks blah. And so on.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 12:52 pm my human rights are being blahed

political correctness gone mad!
on 09 Sep 2009 at 1:07 pm Settle down class Professor Craig's here

Of course the war probably wouldn’t have happened if Britain had accepted the USSR’s offer of alliance. That would have instantly made it unw9nnable by Germany. At worst it would have been over in months with thousands rather than millions of deaths.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 1:26 pm Congrats "Prof" Craig on your most readable contribution thus far

now fuck off you brain dead fuckwit.
on 09 Sep 2009 at 2:19 pm 390th comment lol

blah
on 10 Sep 2009 at 6:11 pm Right Now I'm and Opressed Pirate

and I’m not gonna take it anymore!
on 11 Sep 2009 at 11:56 pm Dammit this is the first time I've been on this site in weeks. What happened?

Once out of nature I shall never take
my bodily form from any natural thing…
on 12 Sep 2009 at 12:35 pm This site got trolled and we took the bait and it became boring. Give it a few more weeks. Subscribe to the RSS feed

Blah

"If you love Syria so much..
why don't you go live there?"

177 Responses to “Massive Horny War”

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spEak You're bRanes

"If you love Syria so much.. why don't you go live there?"

177 Responses to “Massive Horny War”

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"If you love Syria so much..
why don't you go live there?"