Blah blah prisons yadda yadda something about crime thingummy VICTIMS!? I’m sure you can guess what’s coming.
In one of the Arab nations a child rapist and murderer of more than one child is to be beheaded and crucified. You can scream barbaric all you want but can anyone say he will be free to do this again or tax payers money spent keeping him and pandering to his human rights etc . If we could live the last moments of Sarah Payne’s life and then feel what her parents have felt and what they have been through our views would be somewhat different or have I missed something ?
Grant, Luton
Sharia for Britain. Duly noted.
Nice comfy cells, full sky tv subscriptions, the latest computer games, better meals than our children. This is what criminals get! Isnt prison supposed to punish the criminal not keep them entertained until they get released?!
Have them cleaning up our dirty streets, clearing motorway abnkings like they do in the US! Or even better a cell with just a bed and a bucket and bearly enough space to stand. That’ll sort out overcrowding.
Prison shouldnt be a time-out penalty box!
[bigo93], Bradford, United Kingdom
And sentences should be longer than just two mere halves of a paltry forty-five minutes each! That’s what you’re getting at, right?
I saw a report that said prisons were issuing hotel style satisfaction questionnaires in order that their standards didn;t slip! Erh, what about the needs of the poor sole they robbed, beat up, maimed or killed? Did anyone give them a questionnaire to complete in order to find out if their needs had been met?
More criminals should be imprisoned, especially habitual criminals.
Unless there are at least 6 to a cell, then there is no overcrowding.lizben, Luton
I can well understand your anger lizben. Maybe you could find some small comfort by reading a report that says every night, a dirty great unicorn flies in through the window and bum-rapes the quivering prisoners with it’s magic giant cactus-cock.
We’ve tried being nice to criminals. It clearly doesn’t work.
It’s time the hard liners were given a try. Let them have fifty years to see if the tough approach works.
Public flogging for minor crimes like vandalism.
Hard labour for major crimes like burglary.
Hanging for murder.
Prison time should be hard time. When a criminal breaks down and wets himself as his sentence is read out, THEN the system is working again.See Dubya, Liverpool
I can’t tell you how refreshing it was to read this post. Screw the victims, it’s all about my erection.
61 Responses to “Punishment Perverts”
Did
Lizben suggest people get locked up for robbing fish? So many questions…
@Yurrzem:
Stop codding around…
This must be NuLabour (is that how they write it?) pandering to the Animal Rights community. Its political correctness gone mad! Fish like being robbed, beat up, maimed and killed, especially the flat ones.
See Dubya is right, we SHOULD be locking up old incontinents.
I’m sorry I didn’t have anything fun to say, but I wanted to try out blockquotes. I’ll retreat back into my cave now…
“better meals than our children” – try fucking feeding your kids properly
I know that if I could be arsed to search through HYS that I’d find Grant from Luton spouting on about how bad Sharia Law is and how terrible all the furriners are that want to introduce it are…
glad to see dubya’s got his prioritys right
Public flogging for minor crimes like vandalism.
Hard labour for major crimes like burglary.
i know HYS posts dont make sense at the best of times but still that seems really backwards to me
Tax evasion? Dangerous driving? Insurance fraud? Corporate manslaughter? Where do white collar crimes fit on this scale, I can’t help wondering.
Random flipping to page 24 gives this:
The Milk Tray man has a lot to answer for, the fiend.
I like the fact that See Dubya seems to think that harsh prison sentences haven’t been tried here, apart from, for y’know, 1,000 years.
Old hat, I know, but Monty Python satirised this decades ago.
They should split their nostrils with boathooks
Correct me unless I’m not wrong, but haven’t we done hard-line punishment for, like, our entire history? If the hard-line approach was so bloody good, how come we’ve now got this namby-pamby PC gone mad lack of cruel and unusual punishments? Eh?
Fact is, your lot had their chance, Dubya, and blew it. You failed to stamp out crime, so frankly you have no credibility whatsover in this debate. So there.
Incidentally, have you noticed how HYSers think criminals, whatever their crime, should be stripped of all human rights, all dignity, and all societal protection UNTIL the debate turns to speed cameras?
I don’t think Grant read that anywhere, he made it up and he didn’t even think it through.
Even from a simple time management/cost perspective it doesn’t make much sense to behead then crucify someone, the other way round might work I suppose but surely one fatal punishment is enough for even the worst crime.
Not when there are multiple VICTIMS!!!11!!ONE!!
Ignorant fascists want to see more state violence carried out in their name.
What a refreshingly original topic.
Well, I think it’s about time someone spoke up for soles’ rights. They’ve been downtrodden for far too long.
“it’s”?
Er… yes?
Send them to the colonies! Or make them moderate HYS!
I’ve just come back from a couple of pints at lunch.
The three highlighted HYS comments were pretty standard common-fayre for the usual morons who see fit to try to convince us of their moral and intellectual credentials.
I had an idea.
You know the time capsule thingy where you attempt to trap the zeitgeist in a tiny little sealed container. These three fuckwits could be cryogenically frozen and thawed out 1000 years in the future by ex-con one-legged aliens with severe sexual issues and religious beliefs that would put those from Waco, Texas into the relatively normal category.
If only we could then beam their facial expressions back to here and now, I would go out and steal the money to make this happen.
Yes. They all want zero tolerance on everything except when they are caught by a speed camera and then become fine upstanding, law abiding members of the community who were only doing 7 MPH above the speed limit on a quiet road.
The cursed “it’s” is in the blog article proper, My foot hurts.
So you get one freebie, then?
Phew, had me worried for a minute there. I was concerned I’d been spending too much time on HYS and picking up there bad habits.
So the government won’t even provide a decent walkthrough or access to Game FAQs? DISGUSTING.
[blockquotes]Incidentally, have you noticed how HYSers think criminals, whatever their crime, should be stripped of all human rights, all dignity, and all societal protection UNTIL the debate turns to speed cameras?[/blockquotes]
Don’t forget shooting children in the back with a shotgun.
Not that I’m one to ask, I can’t even do blockquotes.
What utter bollocks, let’s see what this rant should have said;
“I read in the Daily Heil, the guardians of truth, that burglars’ get to play computer games and get the top notch package from SKY, all on the tax payer. They reported that it was more luxurious than the Savoy and they only get 2 weeks!!!!!!!”
someone in his family-my arse, there is no family, he was disowned by them a long time ago and now spends his day usefully ranting at his keyboard in the squalid little bedsit that he rents above a laundrette, and the only real human contact that he gets is when he pops down to the corner shop to buy his Pot Noodle and the guy behind the counter says £1.50 please. I hate him, the Aardvarks’ acne ridden arsehole.
Sorry about that last one, just had to spend the whole day in a project planning meeting instead of trawling HYS, SYB and the usual haunts-I hate work, anyone would think they owed me a living.
hey @Desperado, close, but no cigar. Delete the ‘s’ from blockquotes and you should be fine.
There, good deed for the day.
Woohooo!
When I feel heavy metal
Woohoo!
And I’m pins and I’m needles
Woohoo!
As long as I don’t have to do any of the punishing, or work with the damaged dregs of our society.
Wouldn’t want to get my hands dirty. It’s like porn – I’m happy to watch as it turns me on, but I’ve never done the real thing ‘cos it scares me.
And you can bet See Dubya will have his seat reserved in the public gallery for all the juiciest cases.
Don’t apologise. It’s probably a quite eerily accurate character assessment. Interesting how these pricks always have a convenient story they think will prove the tedious non-points they make.
Damn fine irony there, my boy. Damn fine.
I’d just like to add that I think I agree with HYSers on this point. What the justice system really really needs is to have a large part of it acting like they’ve just been raped/mugged/burgled/beaten/been caught speeding/drink driving and waving about the Bible, crying an eye for an eye like those hysterical mothers in Iraq you get on the news. Dispassionate justice? Fuck that. I want the judge leaping over his bench screaming at the defendant at the outset of the trial. Guilty until proven guilty, and if he’s proven innocent or if it’s not the result the victim wants, try them again and again until you get the right result.
What I really think is missing from Western society is some good old fashioned barbarism. I mean, responding to the worst of crimes by slowly slicing offenders to bits is the way to go to level things up. Hey, if they can’t act civilised, why should we?
Or did I just massively miss the point of the word “civilised”?
in lizben’s defence, the senseless crimes committed against fish make me angry, too.
My whole Dover sole last night was lovely. But, you know, murdered first. The humanity!! Er…
Alex, i don’t want to be a sportsbore but the sporting naughty step is given to those massive rugby playing homosexualists, not those who indulge in association football.
2 x 40 mins then, not 45.
i amaze even myself at the depths of my dullness
[blockquote]hey @Desperado, close, but no cigar. Delete the ’s’ from blockquotes and you should be fine.[/blockquote]
Brilliant! Though my brother’s been inside and he said prisoners get better quality blockquotes at the tax payers expense.
Nearly right, but you need angle brackets instead of square ones “Dan”.
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
These!
see, when it comes to food, my dad, a deputy Governor, has been saying that it’s been difficult of late as they’ve not had the food budgets increased in line with rises in the cost of basics. They have a food budget of a massive 60p per prisoner per day…
What are they moaning about, that’s enough for a Mars bar each. It’s not as if they are running about burning off the calories, what with all the Sky TV and games.
Yeah, prison is like a holiday camp, and a really cheap and efficient one at that. I heard they have secret swimming pools underground.
Why, next year I plan to mug some pensioners and get two weeks in the Scrubs. It sounds that fucking good – it must be, because everyone wants to go back.
[blockquote] Well, I think it’s about time someone spoke up for soles’ rights. They’ve been downtrodden for far too long. [blockquote]
I agree. I mean, after all, they’re our soles.
Sorry, I can’t type in a Yorkshire accent but you get the drift.
Coat retrieval sequence initiated.
[blockquote] Arse magic? [/blockquote]
For 5 minutes I scoured the post, and all I could find was that ‘habitual’ is an anagram of ‘halibut’.
God help me, I’ve absorbed so much internet that ‘sole/soul’ doesn’t even register any more.
–
Quite.
* almost an anagram
Don’t worry, I’m reading it in Yorkshire, so it made perfect sense…
Mine was a terrible (and pretty poor) pun about footwear, which I wanted to retract as soon as it was submitted. However, as nobody’s thrown my coat at me, I think I got away with it…
Oh yes, MW is a twat but i’m even more bothered that ‘forrin’ people take Das Heil as an accurate window into life in the UK.
Sweet Jeez.
I bet Grant watched “The Execution Of Gary Glitter[1]” the other night and then cried when he found out someone had Made It Up.
1 – it was shite, and would have been even if it hadn’t contained Ann Widdlecob and Garry Fucking Bushell.
but it was redeemed by that scene where Gazza gets wound up by the Gary Glitter Monster Mix: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ni5YHK1sfFM (sadly there’s only a snippet of it at 0:35)
Oh, and the immortal words “this has gotta be a windup” as they put the noose around his neck.
Speaking of leniency, there’s story on the Daily Mail at the moment about a woman who’s just been fined £75 for littering (she was feeding the ducks).
Clearly this woman has broken the law; she threw stuff on the floor with the intention of leaving it there (until the ducks sucked it up) which is contrary to s87 of the Environment Protection Act 1990.
This woman is blatantly a CRIMINAL. And yet the Daily Mailers are now up in arms because she wasn’t let off!
Honestly, there’s no pleasing some people.
Oops, I mean the Environmental Protection Act 1990.
Citation fail.
And I missed out an indefinite article.
I’m going home.
Wow – if Daniel Almasy wants that for the victims, who knows what he has in mind for the actual perpetrators?
Rochdale, the Devil’s Island of the North.
{{Citation needed}}
“I saw a report that said prisons were issuing hotel style satisfaction questionnaires in order that their standards didn;t slip!!
Incidentally, or rather not, this seems to be a response to the fact that questionnaires were handed out in police station cells. Y’know, those ones filled with people who haven’t actually been convicted of anything.
Never mind. They never gave any of the people they murdered a trial…