Delusions of Grandeur31 Mar 2010 09:39 am
By Kelvin

So the other shoe has dropped and The Times is to be the first of the News International papers to charge for its online content. It’ll be interesting to see what happens when the base of say-havers is limited to those who value their opinion enough to pay for it. The quality might go way up, but depressingly it could equally well go way, way down.

On the bright side, Barnardo Millionaire has discovered some promising evidence that it might just be the former:

As soon as the Times agree to the exciting proposition of paying me for my comments, I will start paying them for an online subscription.

Either the “exciting proposition” of paying works for all online content – their copyright newspaper material and my copyright commentary material – or we will have a tremendously unfair situation where businesses are allowed to exploit copyright but individuals are not.
hubert huzzah

But don’t you see, Hubert? The whole reason News International has to charge for access is to make enough money to pay for your valuable insight! Whereas a free site like us will just infringe your copyright, and call you a chozzler to boot.

41 Responses to “My Copyright Commentary Material”

  1. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:03 am Fish

    As with everything else in Right-Wing Nutjob world, this is governed by the free market philosophy of supply and demand. There’s one News International, and millions of self-centred-cuntiosity commenters. His share value will not be high.

  2. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:03 am naich

    How does one chozzle? Is it something I might be interested in? I’m reasonably depraved.

  3. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:09 am The Violent Majority

    Hubert Huzzah is a syphilitic seal slit.

    Nelson, you owe me a tenner for that copyright commentary material.

  4. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:18 am Oaf

    Nothing to do with this but I liked this comment I read on Farcebook earlier… I mean which someone told me about.

    Me & Dan have written a song about The Daily Mail (a British newspaper). We’re aware this video won’t mean an awful lot if you’ve never heard of The Daily Mail, but on the plus side, you’ve never heard of The Daily Mail.

  5. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:28 am Alex

    Didn’t Enemies of Reason have the exact opposite idea? As in make the gnomes pay a small fee to comment?

    Hubert Huzzah might not like it, but I guarantee he’d be broke within a month of it being introduced.

  6. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:31 am WaymesBrin

    Elsewhere in that debate:

    At 09:15am on 26 Mar 2010, Chris wrote:

    Journalists think they are better than everyone else but the truth is free content will beat them. They are terrified of blogs.

    I’m slightly wary of starting an actual debate here, but this does raise an interesting issue. Of course, few bloggers can actually compete with (good) journalists in providing accurate, timely stories. Chris is simply an arse, and probably a blogger too. However it might transpire that people simply don’t care about accurate, timely news. I can imagine large numbers of readers (the core of which would comprise the HYS crowd) abandoning the main news sites and instead feeding off blogs written by twats with stupid opinions. Twats who, unlike journalists, have no obligation to even try and check their facts.

    Unfortunately BBC news will probably always be free, and this brand of commenter is drawn to its officialness like a fly to steaming horse crap.

  7. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:50 am WaymesBrin

    Oh, and this:

    At 10:05am on 26 Mar 2010, kaiser17 wrote:

    Do they really believe their opinions matter.
    The responsibility of the media is to report news – their egotistical opinions are a thing of the past.
    Journalists don’t write articles anymore, they do a “piece” as though it is some linguistic artform.
    Good riddance – I can make up my own mind so long as I can access freee impartial news

    Brilliant.

  8. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:53 am john Adair's Gerbil

    Hmm, on one side, a journalist, with, one would imagine, a degree and several years experience. On the other, the 21st Century equivalent of the nutter on the bus.

  9. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:54 am john Adair's Gerbil

    Good riddance – I can make up my own mind so long as I can access freee impartial news

    Like the Mail or the Express.

  10. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:01 am Goldstein

    Why does Hubert Huzzah (Great name for a gnome, by the way) use the phrase ‘exciting proposition’ normally in one paragraph, then put it in double quotes for the next? Has he failed to convince himself? Does he not take any of his own spoon-fed bias? Does he stand at the bathroom mirror screaming “Wake up!” for hours on end, then walk away with the feeling that he isn’t listening to himself?

  11. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:03 am WaymesBrin

    I think the “freee” is some kind of tic, aggravated by the astonishing quantity of bollocks he was spewing onto the internet.

  12. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:35 am RT

    http://www.number10.gov.uk/Page22996

    A government live chat on immigration you say? I can’t see how that could go wr…

    Oh.

    It’s almost enough to make you feel the slightest shred of sympathy for Phil Woolas, until you remember it’s the constant government hammering away on how tough they are on immigration that helps feed the tabloid fury.

  13. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:46 am Kelvin

    It’s almost enough to make you feel the slightest shred of sympathy for Phil Woolas

    Yes, if you’re the kind of person who felt the slightest shred of sympathy for smallpox when it was eradicated.

  14. on 31 Mar 2010 at 12:33 pm Schroduck

    Wow, I’ve learned things from that live chat. Mostly that Phil Woolas writes like a fourteen year old who’s just discovered the exclamation mark key.

  15. on 31 Mar 2010 at 12:47 pm Ugeine

    That’s got to be my favourite comment in ages. I can just see the advertisers dropping like flies, if the main advertisers on the Times website are pot noodles, Disney and kleenex.

    It actually makes me ponder how the HYS mob are going to react to the paywall idea.

    There’s no group of non white people that you can easily blame and even an idiot couldn’t fashion a tenous link to Gordon Brown, so there’s going to be a lot of umming and arring as they attempt to look clever.

  16. on 31 Mar 2010 at 1:07 pm Kelvin

    even an idiot couldn’t fashion a tenous link to Gordon Brown, so there’s going to be a lot of umming and arring as they attempt to look clever.

    Ahem. “I cannot afford to subscribe to the Times website because I am drowning under Gordon Brown’s insane tax burden” and “The Times wouldn’t need this extra revenue if Gordon Brown wasn’t so busy gouging businesses in this country.”

    I think you’ll find this idiot’s got two.

  17. on 31 Mar 2010 at 1:11 pm That Bloke in the Corner

    However it might transpire that people simply don’t care about accurate, timely news

    Most of the HYS eye swivellers still believe that we live in the 1930′s where Moseley is still in with a chance, Hitler isn’t really all that bad, and you can still call a darkie a darkie, why should they care about timely up to the minute news.

  18. on 31 Mar 2010 at 1:16 pm Ugeine

    Christ, I think I actually just underestimated the stupidity of HYSers.

    I need to go lie down for a bit.

    Still, as of yet nothing about how our poor journalists need extra funds to make more and more news for the millions of immigrants in the country, so I won’t be grabbing a length of hose pipe and going to the garage just yet.

  19. on 31 Mar 2010 at 1:36 pm Bit Special AKA La Spesh

    @Oaf – here’s the Dan & Dan Daily Mail song you’re on about:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eBT6OSr1TI

    It gave me chortles.

    Now please stop stalking me on Facecrack.

  20. on 31 Mar 2010 at 1:42 pm Knife crimer with a free PS3

    I’m pretty sure that Kelvin et al are perfectly happy to pay for the high quality commentary we get here on SYB.

    All you need to do is leave all your bank details in one of the comments and wait for the cash to come flooding in.

  21. on 31 Mar 2010 at 2:30 pm oliver

    the fucked up thing is, it would make sense for newspapers to keep some trolls on retainer (other than the journalists, that is) to get page views up…

    Or perhaps just an Amazon-style recommendations system, e.g. “Awful fuckwits who commented on “Immigration is not out of control, says Brown” also stained the comments section of “Ricky Martin is gay”, with a link that takes you directly to your next online hate crime opportunity

  22. on 31 Mar 2010 at 4:12 pm Nelson

    All you need to do is leave all your bank details in one of the comments and wait for the cash to come flooding in.

    I already have all your bank details, and your spouse’s phone numbers. Hasn’t everyone been getting my somewhat undeniable threatening tone messages? Perhaps my powers are fading. Bollocks.

  23. on 31 Mar 2010 at 6:49 pm Bit Special AKA La Spesh

    RICKY MARTIN IS GAY?????

  24. on 31 Mar 2010 at 7:11 pm Ed aka Lurkshire Bubble-Hunt

    No, he’s just resting.

  25. on 31 Mar 2010 at 7:31 pm Ugeine

    I’d gladly pay this guy a tenner.

    Stuff and nonsense.

    The Tories are no more racist or zenophobic than the average Daily Mail reader!

    - Dave, Edinburgh, Uk, 31/3/2010 13:53

    Unsurprisingly, this got 588 negative comments.

  26. on 31 Mar 2010 at 7:51 pm Bit Special AKA La Spesh

    The Tories are no more racist or zenophobic than the average Daily Mail reader!

    In other words, massively and unrepentantly?

  27. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:01 pm pigfrottage via Facebook

    and call you a chozzler to boot.

    red wine + monitor = :(

    @La Spesh. I will forever stalk you on facecrack, whatever that is, from now on. I don’t recommend googling facecrack by the way.

  28. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:36 pm Nelsons' Armpit [the worst one]

    Yet again I waste my fucking time on you bunch of cunts

    Twelve bloody hours and more or less the same number of shit comments

    Have any of you fuckers got something even remotely funny to say?

  29. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:53 pm Dizzy

    WaymesBrin

    I’m slightly wary of starting an actual debate here, but this does raise an interesting issue. Of course, few bloggers can actually compete with (good) journalists in providing accurate, timely stories.

    I know a blogger who’s quite big around these parts (fnar, fnar) and whose partner, to boot, is a journalist for a wire service, which helps his profile. However, while other big bloggers in the top ten list are only too happy to stroke their massive egos and tiny cocks by appearing on TV, or giving quotes to the “lamestream media” in order to big up their profile, this one lives by the mantra that “bloggers shouldn’t ever be taken seriously – especially by themselves.”

  30. on 31 Mar 2010 at 10:56 pm Dizzy

    There we go, blockquote fail. I’m sure you can work it out.

  31. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:24 pm john Adair's Gerbil

    Dear Mr. Armpit.

    The People Who Give A Fuck live here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pitcairn_Islands

  32. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:39 pm Nelsons' Armpit [the worst one]

    Is that not where descendants of a British naval icon fuck each other?

  33. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:47 pm Pirate Pete

    I have two very quick things to say…

    Re the Ricky Martin is gay??? comment – you mean you hadn’t figured it out years ago? I underestimate my gaydar sometimes I really do…

    On the plus side I’m not going to say one word about the Times issue, because I’d just start getting all serious and arsey, so I won’t

  34. on 31 Mar 2010 at 11:55 pm Dizzy

    Well, Pete, having just stopped working for a major news conglomorate, and knowing how much money they made year-end and what kind of unadulterated shit they spent it on, I can be fairly sure that I’m right when I say that Murdoch is talking out of his Sharpei-shaped arsehole when he says that they need to do this in order to be able to pay for quality. Especially when the best the Times has to offer is Frank Skinner talking about how great it is to be a minority Christian or something.

    It doesn’t need to be serious though. All you really need to do is sprinkle that rant with the occasional allusion to an animal’s genitals, and hey presto, no-one will take you seriously anyway!

  35. on 01 Apr 2010 at 10:01 am Bit Special AKA La Spesh

    @Pete – erm, yeah, I was being ironic. Surely everyone in the world could tell Ricky Martin was as gay as a teapot after 3 seconds of seeing him for the first time.

  36. on 01 Apr 2010 at 11:47 am Kelvin

    The wonderful thing about wire access is that it demonstrates just how little actual news-gathering most news outlets do (it’s equally true of radio and the papers, fortunately in this country the TV is mostly immune from it). If you’re actually interested in the content of the news rather than a hyperbolic reaction to it, five minutes on the wires demonstrates just how counterproductive it is to buy a newspaper.

  37. on 01 Apr 2010 at 12:13 pm Bugrat

    Gay as a teapot?

    http://www.teapottery.co.uk/

  38. on 01 Apr 2010 at 5:41 pm Pirate Pete

    I want an eccentric teapot – one shaped like a toilet please :(

  39. on 01 Apr 2010 at 5:48 pm Pirate Pete

    You know what Dizzy, you’re right – I don’t know why it gets me worked up. We all know that six months after putting up the paywall no-one will remember the name of that paper that Rupert Murdoch owned – was it The Tomes, The Teams? Something like that – shame you can’t google it anymore…

  40. on 12 Apr 2010 at 3:46 am teaparty

    howdy, great blog post.

  41. on 12 Apr 2010 at 6:23 am Rosa Hobell

    What happen to the showbiz world? Who will come out as gay.