Political Discrimination Ngone Wrong
By KelvinThanks to Jacob for finding the postings of this angry little stubcock in a thread where ThisIsBristol reported that scare scare hyperbole tearjerk tearjerk now wank yourself silly imagining how you’d vigilante his ass if only you weren’t a fat middle aged clunge.
This is an outrage. Every time I come on here to politely suggest that someone be hanged or stoned to death, my post gets removed.
This is political discrimination ngone wrong. Not happy.
Terry (& June), Falling off a sunbed
Au contraire, Terry. They remove your posts because when you talk politely about stonings and being tanned, they assume you’re a muslim favouring sharia law. Which I think you’ll find is political discrimination ngone exactly the way you want it to. Try being more self-absorbed, angry and patronising. That way they’ll know you’re really an ineffectual white middle class Travis Bickle wannabe.
59 Responses to “Political Discrimination Ngone Wrong”
A lesson for politicians everywhere. If you want to raise taxes, don’t mention education, health or pensions. Pretend you want to build a massive whirling vortex of knives.
I can’t decide whether to read his post with the theme music in the background or not.
Actually, yes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_muwtTQjMg makes it all better. Must try this for upcoming Election broadcasts.
Assuming that the first paragraph is a suggestion for improvement that would make Rich… never mind. I’ve been distracted by the thought of a Government Matey. Perhaps a Peter Mandelson version?
Tsk. Looks like if you want political discrimination done right, you’ve got to do it yourself
no. If you want it ndone right you’ve got to ndo it yourself.
N
Please paste this capital letter over the incompetantly placed lower case letter in the previous post.
…humorously suggest global thermonuclear war, seriously suggest the existence of God, chastely suggest an orgy, gluttonously suggest fasting…
No, but I fucking love this one:
Oh, if only they had charts for those things.
…says Tash, frantically jerking himself off to another shuddering climax trying very hard not to bear thinking about it really.
The “nuch” is a nice touch, too.
I don’t want to burst your bubble, but I’m going to go ahead and guess that Tash is actually not a stupid male, but a stupid female.
I make no comment, this baby needs to speak for itself!
I’ve heard Le Corbusier accused of a lot of things, but never the systematic failure of a child services unit before.
Charles is clearly using Word Of The Day toilet paper to mop up his sticky white love piss
By “Lords and ladies of the land who make jam”, is Rich having a pop at the WI?
He needs to watch himself if so, them bitches is dangerous. I remember the slow handclap they gave that nice Mr Blair. Scathing, it was. Scathing.
Does anyone else think that that URL looks like they’ve pasted in the reaction of the first random grunting mouthbreather they asked for an opinion?
Ug *smash*!
@Ed – it’s OK, just substitute ‘frigging’ for ‘jerking’, and not only does the sentence still make sense, but you get some bonus alliteration. Happy days.
Also ‘herself’ for ‘himself’. Made a bit of a Daily Mail article out of that one.
@ Ugly Newt
When first clicking on the link I actually assumed that a ‘killer pregnant Bristol mother’ had been ‘let walk’ and was slightly disappointed not to encounter the additional venom that such a story would have encouraged.
Having gone to school in Knowle West, it’s not a particularly unlikely scenario.
Hmm, maybe I should have added ‘I am aware’ in the middle of that last sentence, since without the phrase it appears to imply that I am, in fact, a killer pregnant mum.
Charles Henry of Somersetshire is a treasure, isn’t he?
And by “treasure”, I mean “stupid cunt”.
Oh, joy of joys! He has a blog! This tops his latest typespasm:
“On or about August 2007, human character stayed exactly the same, and something really shitty happened to a kid and the internet got all puffy and hard-up about it.”
In that spirit, I
wrotedone a poem in the style of e.e. cummings.I actually had to look up ‘diuturnity’, and was surprised to read that it is in fact a synonym of ‘right fucking prick.’
Did anyone else read Terry (& June)’s comment in the voice of Tony Harrison off of The Mighty Boosh?
“A house is a machine for abusing children in”
Oh dear.
I wrote that comment as a pisstake.
Nice to know you’re on the ball though.
So these units then,are they portable? Do they have a maintenance contract with them to prevent failure? Do you have to plug the child into it? Do you have to have,or be, a child to enjoy these services? are they like Mr Spocks little black bleepy thing that he used to use when he landed on planets?
I’m not sure you’d want one Bloke, they seem to failing all over the place under Gordon Clown BOOM BOOM! HA!
Take THAT NuLieBoerWar!
Is it still raining outside?
What we need is an inventer of Andy K Buxton type genius to invent a machine to transfer illnesses such as cancer and AIDS. Ant murdering peadophilic scum can then have cancer transferred from an innocent person into them, thus saving a fortune in both expensive cancer drugs and prison places.
Genius
For ant replace and, typing skills rather than spelling I am afraid.
I say, Mr. But Dim, I think you’re lost. Let me help you.
Also, you forgot to mention racist squirrels and how that “ant murdering peadophilic [sic] scum” appeared on the Andrew Marr Show to claim getting pumped full of cancer was against his human ant rights.
Although all my Tims stand by “inventer”.
Didn’t I write all those novels about Kenya? How come every time I write something about brutal British suppression and post colonial corruption, I get put in prison?
Not happy.
Actulolled at this. You can stay.
If I believed you were the person who wrote that comment, and I believed that person genuinely meant it as a pisstake, I’d suggest to that person that maybe next time they take the piss they try to give some subtle clue that they’re doing so, so as to distinguish them from the bona fide comments saying the same thing. Humour often works, I’d tell them, maybe try that.
To be fair, Kelvin, I thought it was a piss take from the moment I read it and was quite suprised no-one commenting picked up on it either…
I’m afraid I’m all out of gold stars, but what if I write “well done!” in red ink on your exercise book?
If that floats your boat then do as you please.
I’m more than familiar with the level of choice fuckwittery that gets posted on here but ‘politely suggest[ing] that someone be hanged or stoned to death’ I thought was perhaps a ‘subtle clue’ that it wasn’t to be taken seriously…
Oh, now you point that out it’s amazing it didn’t occur to me earlier. I mean, internet political comment boards are notorious for the lack of calls to reinstate the death penalty.
Too young to remember “Terry & June”?
Young enough to remember it used exactly the same sets as Rentaghost.
@Blah
I called Poe, then I read the second line and the rest of the comments in the thread.
Sad truth is – and looking at the shit that gets sent to my inbox every working day – people usually are very polite when they describe in detail what should be done to people who do things they don’t like. Like get elected, usually.
What does Easter mean to you?
Ok. You have to put Hot Cross Buns in the toaster or under the grill to make them hot. I like your idea about Good Friday though. Perhaps next year we should have Good Friday on a Saturday.
It’s a borderline one. My first thought wasn’t “This is a pisstake” but “Might this be a pisstake?”. The problem is, well, Poe’s Law. I don’t know why anyone bothers.
Kelvin seems to be in an unusually arsy mood, though. It’s sunny! The daffodils are out! You don’t have to go back to work til Tuesday! I can’t even muster the energy to mock HYSers. Shut down the computer and have a cold beer.
Yeah, it’s because people keep giving me trite advice about cheering up.
@Kelvin
Still, could be worse. Cheer up, you old bugger! Worse things happen at sea, you know!
Worse things certainly do happen at see – arrr mateys!
see = sea oh bollocks
Bullshit. I’ve been at sea and it wasn’t this bad.
You know, you come from nothing, you’re going back to nothing. What have you lost? Nothing!
I think the problem is that no-one’s been able to locate Jesus’ death certificate, so we just have to guess. But I do appreciate that looking at the calendar to determine when something happens once a year can be a real inconvenience. He has my
contemptsympathies.@Dizzy
It’s the use of the word ‘should’ that gets me. That one little word is the proof of their thought processes, which happen like this:
OPINION……….LEGISLATION
There’s nothing in between, no room for counter-opinion, reconsideration, compromise or pragmatism. If they think something, it should be law. FACT. Never mind whether you’re the only person in the world who holds that opinion, never mind whether you’ve even held that opinion yourself for longer than it took you to mind-spunk it on to the screen.
Hence: So and so SHOULD be locked up, they SHOULD bring back hanging, such and such SHOULD be banned, and Good Friday SHOULD be fucked around with even though it works perfectly well and guarantees us a long weekend.
Well, look on the bright side – as long as they’re saying SHOULD then it isn’t IS. I prefer reading SHOULD to populist legislation based on the fantasies of the ignorant.
**Goldmine alert**
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/haveyoursay/2010/04/is_sex_addiction_a_real_illnes.html
Probably worth a thread of its own if any of the Special Ones are around.
First two comments are from our good friend EBAYTKMAX, followed swiftly by Will Kay’s observation that
I love (not sex) the idea that poor Tiger might be remembered for his contributions to medical research, rather than being an above-average golfer. I’m waiting with bated breath for the jokes about holes in one, birdies, and getting trapped in a bit of rough.
However, there is a serious side to all of this, as enunciated sternly by DP
Well, that seems to have cleared that up. If only this rash was as easy to deal with.
If I could predict the unexpected i reckon I’d be an expert at all sorts of shit
Meanwhile, on the Doctor Who thread a poster has written to state that he is doubly unqualified to comment
*A Doctor writes: Many of my patients as me if posting on HYS merely to state that they have no knowledge of the subject is a sign of mental damage. Unfortunately, this is a symptom of the advanced stages of Twatbasket Syndrome only curable by a prolonged and intensive course of Kadir-Buxtoning.
Is “Get a grip!” the new “End of.”?
Is “Get a grip!” the new “End of.”?
I think ‘When in Rome!’ might be up there for stories about anything that happens in forrun you couldn’t make up, and which, by extension, gives a green light for any sort of unpleasant bigotry and intolerance you want to promote at home simply because Dubai’s enforced it’s rather opaque laws on pissed up expats.
A friend you say?
to all those ex-pats awaiting arrest in Dubai for breaking their stupid laws, I laugh at you. HA-HA.