spEak You’re bRanes

Turns out that Iran doesn’t have a nuclear weapons programme after all. If you thought this was about to lead to some sane discussion about the real reasons behind the sabre rattling (Iran’s decision to start selling oil in euros and how it might affect the American dollar, perhaps) think again.

The HYS on this subject seems to feature a reassuring portion of sane comments (presumably because it’s made the ohmygod-iran-is-going-to-kill-us-all lobby look rather daft and so they’re keeping a low profile) but there’s still a hardcore of spectacularly misinformed simpletons who see this exposure of US lies about the “threat” from Iran as… er… proof of the terrifying threat posed by Iran.

Check out these credulous fools.

Well, just they got it wrong on Iraq (by over-estimating the level of threat), they may be getting it wrong this time on Iran (by under-estimating it).
Deniz, Paris

If US intelligence is as accurate on this as it was on WMD then we should expect to see Israel “wiped off the map” sometime in the near future.

It really is a criminal mistake to trust any leader who has threatened to wipe a country off the map. We must learn the lessons of history, and of appeasement.

Don’t Trust The Intelligence

Are you bummer tied to a tree?

Someone find me something funny from that thread before I fling myself out of a window.

Should Nato members send more troops to Afghanistan?

If it’s to crush the terrorist then yes but any other mission would prove futile!!

Ed Brown, Watford

I have a picture of you writing this on your todo list. You’re using a blue crayon and wearing a frown of concentration. Your tongue is sticking out as you write “Crush… ” (you swap to red crayon) “… terrorists”.

We need to get these ideas to the people in charge. I’ll write them a letter, just in case they don’t read HYS.

Dear Generals of Army,

Nelson

This one was very popular. Thanks to Matt and Liam for both submtting it.

The belief among some people that democracy can be the solution for Pakistan is naive.

The sad truth is that Pakistan is incapable of democratic government.

The real question is whether Pakistan is going to be governed by the military or by extremist Muslim Clerics.

Take your pick - but if the military have the sense & courage to build a secular nation as Kemal Attaturk did in Turkey, it would be by far the better choice.
Herbert Thornton, Canada

Darkies eh? Can’t live with ‘em, can’t prop up their corrupt governments and keep them in poverty whilst generally bombing the fuck out of them whenever you feel like it. Whaddayagonnado?

“What should be done to stop the spread of hospital infections?”

Move in troops (Army)
Is this post code sorted like Cancer treatment too?

Mr. Mark Anthony Watson, Doncaster

Also, I’ve got an itch right up my bumcrack and I could do with some troops (Army) to scratch it for me.

A missile defense system is possibly the stupidest idea since the eight-track. There’s just no way either Russia or the U.S. could build a system that would remotely minimize the damage of a full scale launch against the country or a terrorist rogue missile.
ross lar

Thank you Mr Defense expert. Missile defense systems are a proven technology and a missile defense system in Europe could save millions of lives in case of an attack by a less than rational state (who said Iran?).

Azam Azam

You did, you credulous pea-brained cock.

Some countries are not capable of being governed in a democratic manner. It just so happens, from centuries of experience, that Pakistan is one such nation. It is a nation rife with corruption and a violent tribal heritage, therefore a strong dictatorship (preferably benevolent in nature) is the most suitable option.

Mal Borne, P’boro, United Kingdom

Indeed. We British should know, we invented it, then had to work extra hard to gain our “centuries of experience” in the 60 years that have since elapsed.

You were really hard to categorise Mal. I had to put you in “Permanently Bewildered”, “Delusions of Grandeur”, “Armchair Generals”, “Werthers Original Imperialists”, and “Racists”. I nearly added a new category just for you. I was going to call it simply “Pricks”.

I’ve been to Burma and what they need is a civil war it’s the only thinig which will create the change they need in the smallest space of time. Peaceful protest is a lovely ideal but when you want things to really change you gotta stand up and take arms, blood is the fuel of change. Gandhi was wrong.
Pedro, Tunbridge wells

Exactly. History has shown us time and again that these tree-hugging lefties are doomed to failure until they manage to persaude a power-mad psycopath to reluctantly elbow his way to the top of their beardy “collective” and stamp his authority on it with a big iron boot. And possibly a big fuck-off gun.

There’s only one thing that will stop Burma’s gang of bloodthirsty military leaders and that’s a gang of bloodthirsty military leaders who can stage a coup and then rule with an iron fist of peace.

it is hard for me to believe that Iran can say their nuclear program is for ‘peaceful’ purposes… they have a butt load of oil that they are sitting on….be real….

the US or Israel or both will hit Iran within the next year… probably even less.. civilian sites will not be hit… the army will not be used… it will be surgical strikes… shock and awe…. the US is good at this.. not city fighting as in Iraq. anyway, don’t forget 9-11. and ask yourself what u would do if it were u ???
Joe Terry, guadalupe

Hmmm.. I’d probably carry on with “doing whatever the fuck I like, who’s going to stop me?”. Perhaps I’d wait 6 years and then convince enough of you retards, with your goldfish memories, that it’s ok to bomb any foreigners who won’t do as I tell them.

Typical BBC removed from reality question. ‘is scouting relevant today?’

Well it is MORE relevant today then it has ever been. Scouting teaches you skills associated with the army. We are currently fighting 2 wars and are short of troops.

So scouting is very very relevant today. Why on earth do they allow girls in the scouts though? They have the guides? Why do they want to be in scouts?

Would you have men and women fighting together in the same combat unit? No.

Sam

I have to say, I think you’re being a bit sexist here. If a girl can take on the Troop Leader and earn her Knife Fighting Badge like anyone else then I think she deserves to go to war alongside all the other kids.

Thanks to Dave for this one.

NATO??? Did you say NATO??? Call me an ambulance, I’ve split my sides!!! NATO couldn’t defend my kid’s tree house without internal squabbles about whose troops will & won’t be put in harm’s way.
Once the objectives have been agreed the politicians should shut up & leave it to the military to deliver. To do otherwise is to tie the hands of the troops on the ground - and it’s difficult using an assault rifle in that situation.
Fire Storm, Chelmsford

That ambulance joke is BRILLIANT and really lends weight to the argument that follows.