Celibacy isn’t a Christian idea, it comes from St Paul who, last time I checked wasn’t Jesus.
Wardonia

You could interpret this one in a couple of ways at least. It could be that she’s making a subtle allusion to the idea that, rather than being handed down to us by a benevolent beard in the sky, organised religions have actually been carefully domesticated, nurtured and husbanded by humans. She could be trying to gently suggest that any god shit you feel you absolutely have to indulge in should probably be personal. Or it could be that Wardonia is dangerously thick, permanently wrong, inexplicably smug and generally a shoo-in for the title of “World’s Most Ill-equipped Pedant – 2010″.

I went and read a few more of her comments, to see if I could tell. You’ve probably got a fair idea how that went.

“England’s children’s commissioner says the age of criminal responsibility should be raised from 10 to 12. Do you agree?”

From the age of nine to ten the human brain destroys a lot of brain connections it thinks it no longer needs and no further development of morals or conscience is possible.
Scientists have described this cull as ’savage’.
Does this idiot think she knows better than scientists in this field? Or, as I suspect, this is the first move towards moving the age of criminal liability to age 25.
Wardonia

Do you think anyone has ever said “You’re not as stupid as you look” to Wardonia? Personally, I doubt it. But I guess there’s a chance she rides around on a tinsel-covered tricycle and has a cock and balls on her chin.

When the leader is in charge of ‘Have your Say’ and makes a total mess of ‘updating’ it so that it loses it’s point and it’s appeal – without consulting any of the contributors.

OK, so not the worst bullying I’ve ever suffered but my feelings are definitely hurt. No recommendations? How am I supposed to feel heard? Is anybody out there?

Chris Jones, Rickmansworth, United Kingdom

It’s always hard losing something you love. Chris Jones may have a little void in his heart where the ‘recommend’ button used to be, but it will heal with time. Until then, we’ll find him standing, dejected-looking, in the bread aisle at Sainsbury’s, poking wistfully at a pack of white English muffins.

Remember when the beeb asked the gnomes “Should sportsmen be role models off the pitch?”. BigHitter decided it was time to wheel out the word “moot”. He had obviously been deeply impressed by someone who used it once and had been practising at home, in front of the mirror, ever since. “The point is moot!” he’d say, waggling his eyebrows. Sometimes he’d hold a finger in the air and pause for effect before letting rip with the full force of his weighty moot. “The point, Sir” (significant waggle) “is moot!”. And then he’d fling his coat over his arm and stalk out of the room, feeling like a Massive Professor of Opinions ‘N’ Shit.

So, practice over, here he is, giving it a go in public. Be kind, this is his first time.

They dont glean any respect from me, so the point is moot.

But, they should be insiprational to youngsters, after all , they are all adults who never grew up but alas they have been developed inside a pandering , narcissist bubble all of their adult life , subsequently know very little of the real world

Ridiculous wages for what amounts to very little achievement
[BigHitter]

Shit at sport, eh?

Anyway, my advice is that you take “moot” along to a few open mic nights before you try another proper gig with it. Hone your skills in front of a friendly crowd. Also, and sorry if I’m doing you a disservice here, but you strike me as the sort of cunt who might start riffing on shit like “ergo”, “methinks” and “QED”. This is the equivalent of launching into a twenty minute acappella of “Hallelujah” and then, just as everyone is about to glass themselves in the tits, asking them to “join in if you know the words”. Trust me, you can’t pull this off. You’re WORSE at this than you were at sport.

They also got rid of the RSS feeds of user posts. Now I have to scan through, looking for good shit, instead of simply subscribing to the feeds of the most amusingly self-important bellends. It’s not massively rewarding.

I’m going through old ones I saved but never got round to posting. Sometimes, it’s never too late.

If a victim is being physically attacked, the victim can use self defence to protect himself. That is the law of the land, and it should be no different in the classroom.

To those who are shocked with this statement, believing that children should not be taught that violence is the answer to violence. Well remember this: bullying is easy when the victim can’t retaliate; and sometimes, it’s never too early to learn about the real world.
Lloyd Belle, Nottingham, United Kingdom

Good call, Lloyd. Sometimes, the only way to stop bullying is to batter the fuck out of someone much smaller than you.

Vanessa Redgraves grossly exaggerated curtsy was hilarious last night.
Is this the republican revolutionary of old?
She is also looking and sounding a bit doddery.
However she has lost a daughter this last year and she must be suffering inside.
That will have had a huge effect on her.
- Jennifer, Yorkshire

Nah, it’s probably just wind. Wind and Communism. Fucks me up on chilly days too.

We should have hung them when they were ten. Killing children is wrong and should be punished by death.

Pritesh Hathalia, Leicester

Ideally the hangman should be eight years old so we can go after him next.

Dan Oxford wrote:
Destroy your own culture through political correctness, Frnkfurt school inspired Marxist deconstructing and undermining, along with post- colonial guilt, encourage a policy of mass immigration from areas of war and tribal violence, cover up any reference to a likely increase in crime, allow the cultural vaccuum to be filled with money, violence and sex based US ’street culture’= explosion of tribal gang violence and gang rape. I feel ‘enriched’ already…

Unfortunately Dan, I’m afraid I can only give you a C for this, as you forgot to mention Russian formalists, an influential circle of Viennese psychoanalysts or French radical lesbians.

1 The Rapiscan is not an x-ray machine it uses “T” rays
2 No one scientifically or Medically qualified has done a study as to the effect of “T” rays on living human tissue.
3 Should I be refused permission to board my flight I will immediately strip totally naked in the security queue and show the staff and everyone that I am clean and have no impediments to boarding.
4) Having been seen naked and proved my innocence beyond doubt I will sue Manchester Airport and the British government for millions for denying me my absolute right to travel under admiralty law the highest law on the planet..

john marsh

Funnily enough I know John Marsh. I was behind him in the queue at Tesco the other day. Turns out, there’s been no study by anyone scientifically or Medically qualified on the effect of typing in your pin number to the little credit card machine. I won’t go into the details of what happened next, but suffice to say John is about to become a very rich man and it will be a while before I can bring myself to eat sausages again.

Saw an email joke recently, but it made sense. rather than scanning, have each individual traveler step into a giant bomb detonation device. If they don’t blow up, they can properly board. If they do blow up, hey, happy virgin time and we are safe

Richard king

Jesus, Richard, don’t tell us you got a joke that made sense and then keep it from us. You could have used the space where you had your exploding muslim fantasy wank to tell it.

And thanks to Louis for spotting this slightly disappointed pervert:

“but they also afford clear outlines of passengers’ genitals.” What genitals? Some women have breasts, big deal; the rest is on the inside. It’s like looking out the window: there’s nothing to see.

Phil E. Drifter

Phil, take a deep breath. Now look up and look for a green sign saying “EXIT.” Once you go through that door, you will no longer be in a modern art exhibit consisting of mannequins and empty window frames, and the world will make a lot more sense.

Thanks to Jo, who spotted these quotes at the time.

Good. It’s about time this Nazi behaviour induced by propaganda, lies, behavioural manipulation, poisoning and psychology…. was confronted head on and stopped now before this Government, and the one above it, lead the Lemmings over the Cliff… for a laugh! Wake Up! You are Programmed!

Rob O’Loughlin, Presteigne UK

And the only way to break that programming is to push innocent women onto live railway tracks. Damn that sinister illuminati for not wanting us to attempt murder on anyone who asks us to do things we don’t like. Don’t they know that Hitler lived by exactly the same principles?

I hope the two men never get caught, She is trying to help police society be enforcing fascist rules. The European Charter on Human Rights gives us the right to freedom of expression which smoke falls under. First the government deny us our rights with their tyrannical laws and now the people are trying to enforce them.

James Cochran, Bradford, England

It’s all about the Human Rights here. Infringe someone’s made-up right to smoke, and you’re subject to their equally made-up right to try and kill you. Similarly if an immigrant tries to deny you the freedom of expression to beat him with a stick, you can make up the right to beat him with a stick.

It’s like my grandma always said, “there’s a fine line between righteousness and self-righteousness.” Being a vigilante can lead to unpleasantness, so be sure you’re big enough to take the weight if you decide to go that way.

Azhid Madrors, California

Has anyone else seen the latest issue of Batman? It’s brilliant, first of all he uses his batarang to climb up to the 37th floor of an apartment building. Then he sneaks into the elevator shaft and waits until he hears someone flip open a zippo. Then he uses his bat-polite-voice to point out that the person’s in a shared lobby and there are no-smoking signs up. Of course, Batman was trained in tibetan martial arts so he can take that kind of risk. If you’re a woman you should probably just cower in a corner.

I can believe that people cannot see the effect that nonsensical rules and busybodies are having on the UK.
The argument started because of someone trying to enforce something that is clearly nonsensical and was allowed in this country for more than 178 years.

Farningham road station is not Oxford Circus, its in the middle of nowhere,
The risk to the railway system from someone smoking on an open platform in the middle of nowhere is zero. The platforms are made of non combustible materials and new trains manufactured to BS6853 are also impossible to burn with a cigarette.

If the smoking is offending someone they can move.

I am a non-smoker and I don´t condone what these guys have done, but there does need to be some defiance of the governments stupid rules by somebody.

Fred, Singapore

Bang on Fred. If you don’t like governments passing silly laws on what habits you can express in public, you can go somewhere nice and permissive like Singapore. Well I can’t because I work for Wrigley’s, but in principle, y’know?

There has NEVER been a good reason for ever having an Asian Network paid for by the TV licence payer.

An ‘Anglo Saxon’ radio station would never be tolerated, neither would a ‘White British’ channel be tolerated by the powers that be. And for goodness sake, even England doesn’t merit a radio channel of its own although Wales, Scotland and NI do! So why on earth the Asian community should be so specially treated is a mystery.

Or is it?

- Alan, Bewdley, Worcs

And you know, as a White British (not in Wales, Scotland or NI) myself I find his logic hard to escape. I can’t have a channel tailored to my interests – I mean, what kind of channel would show endless repeats of Top Gear and QI – so no-one should get a channel tailored to their interests. The BBC should identify the Average Licence Payer – Middle-Aged, About 5′ 7″, No Non-White Genes At All, Lives In Bewdley, Worcs – and make only television and radio for that person. But you can’t say that without a bunch of PC drones accusing you of being some kind of selfish white imperialist bastard.